Before You Complain, Note How I Did NOT Make A Beaver Joke

We've got a triple-hitter today, minions: not only is it No Housework Day (woo!), it's also National Beer Day (hoo!) AND International Beaver Day!!

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[crickets]

No?

OK, but that still means we can get sloshed on thrones of dirty laundry, right? Beavers optional*.

(*Beavers Optional is the name of my Damn Yankees cover band.)

Also, cider beers count, right? Because I don't really like the taste of beer.

Oops, I'm supposed to be showing you cakes, huh?

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It's a turtle.

Obviously.

 

While I was looking up what crazy holidays we could celebrate today, I also discovered it's Bat Appreciation Week:

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Batman: "He'll never see me."

 

AND it's International Twit Award Month.

Now, I know it's still early in the month, but I'm callin' it:

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This baker wins.

 

And finally, allow me to send you off with my own holiday, which I've decided to call the Day Of Being Thankful This Sign On The Card Swiper Is Spaced Properly:

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Give it a minute.

You know, to see the funny thing, not to... um... hoo boy... uh, LOOK! Over there! [points] [runs off]

 

Thanks to Dianne W., Laura H., Paula S., Dustin O., & Stephanie H. for proving the penis mightier.

*****

P.S. The perfect product link for this post doesn't exis...

Bone-Shaped Ballpoint Pens

OH LOOK

Boner pens.

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot: