Search

My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Wednesday
Jul012009

Happy Canada Day!

No, my northern friends, I didn't forget about you. For some reason your bakeries just aren't churning out the patriotic-themed Wreckage - and for that I'm torn between congratulating you and scolding you.

Fortunately I do have a few specimens to share, though, and I'll also be sure to liberally sprinkle in some "Eh?"s throughout today's post, to demonstrate my impeccable cultural sensitivity. (I know better than to tick off a country of people wearing those hats with the earflaps and hanging out with moose all day, Ok? I mean... eh?)

First, let us non-Canadians take a gander at what your flag is supposed to look like:


Simple, bold, graphic... I have to say, Canada: I like it. Eh?

And then there's this:

Ah, the airbrush...uniting the world in Wreckage. Eh?

And this:

The finger hole was the result of an over-eager guest, but that "leaf" is pure Wreckerator skill at work. Kinda looks like a monster on a Popsicle stick, doesn't it? Eh?

I'm pretty sure this next one must be from Canada, too, because, well...

...it says "I heart flannel". And we all know what country loves flannel! Eh? (Right now the rest of you are jealous of my superior cultural diversity, aren't you? Yeah, I can tell.)

To leave you on a sweet note - Eh? - check out the beautiful Canadian flag-inspired cake Jessica J. found:

So pretty! It looks like this was displayed at a convention in the Philippines, but I don't see the baker's name listed. You can see more pretty cakes at the source page, though. Eh?

Nicole K., Michaelle P., & Lauren K., I would leave you with lovely French phrase, but I don't know any French.

Auf Wiedersehen!

Eh?

Wednesday
Jul012009

Considering the Uterus

Warning: Impending TMI of a medical nature. (In case the title didn't already clue you in.)

Tomorrow I will have the dubious pleasure of having the insides of my uterus cauterized. In honor of the occasion, we could take a look at the uterus in all its glory and learn from the wonders of the human body.

OR...

We could take a look at what other women order when they get their lady-bits worked on. After all, I could use a little inspiration.

(Yeah, I like option "B" better, too.)

This woman nicknamed her baby bag "Tilly", and then ordered it a farewell cake, like so:


Hm. Not a bad idea, really. Of course, coming up with just the right nickname for your internal organs can be a mixed bag - er, no pun intended. Plus, I'd have to give mine a guy's name, since I refuse to believe any female would inflict such horrors on another. So...The McCramper? Sweeney Todd? Sir-Clumps-A-Lot? I'm open to suggestions, obviously.

Elizabeth made this nifty Operation cake for her mom, who was feeling kinda down about an impending hysterectomy:

Elizabeth writes, "My friends said I should have made a driver's license with her picture and changed the F to an M, but since I didn't want her to kill herself, I just made this."

Good call, Elizabeth. Having the cake recipient collapse in a sobbing heap can be such a killjoy. Far better to take the more chipper, Pollyanna-ish route:

Although there is the possibility that wishing someone a "happy" hysterectomy could lead to a different kind of meltdown: Anyone remember Wendi Aaron's famous "Happy Period" rant at Always maxi pads? If not, and you don't mind a little language, you should check it out.

Here's my favorite line:

"...there will never be anything "happy" about a day in which you have to jack yourself up on Motrin and KahlĂșa and lock yourself in your house just so you don't march down to the local Walgreens armed with a hunting rifle and a sketchy plan to end your life in a blaze of glory."

Ah, which of us hasn't been there, eh, ladies? Or are there right now? ("Husband!! Bring me more Kahlua!!")

Some women obviously have a better relationship with their bits than I do, though:

Friends? Friends?!?
("Husband!! I mean it!!")


Now granted, I'm not having Sir-Clumps-A-Lot removed tomorrow, but that doesn't mean I'm any less apprehensive about the anesthesia and the whole, you know, cauterizing thing. So if any of you have some spare well wishes to send my way, the doctor's way, the Almighty's way, etc., I'd sure appreciate it.


Oh, and for the most realistic-looking (ie shiiiny) uterus cake yet, check out Debbie's here.

Thanks to Wreckporter Hall-of-Famer Monique R. for finding the last three.


UPDATE:
For all of you asking if vasectomy cakes will be next: Been there, done that. :D