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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Thursday
Jan012009

Year of the Tongue?

Happy New Year, from a pig with the world's longest tongue:

Or I suppose it could be an ant-eater. Or a wild boar. Or an anthropomorphized vacuum cleaner.

Or, if you turn it THIS way, a Billy Goat wearing a balloon hat:

Heh, it's like an ink blot test. What do YOU see?*

Thanks and belated birthday greetings go to Amy C., who suffers from having a birthday between Christmas and New Years. Like many kids growing up with such a birth date, she never had a birthday cake of her very own. So last week, after years of waiting for someone else to buy her a cake, she decided to go out and just get it herself. [standing and applauding] Plus, she ALSO bought this cake - with no intention of eating it - solely to share with us here on Cake Wrecks. Now that's a Wreckporter.

Amy, you just keep wreckin' on with your bad self. And thanks for the reminder that life's too darn short to not buy your own birthday cake. Live it up this year, my friend, and enjoy that cake.

* You know, besides the obvious but not-so-creative pink elephant. ;)

Thursday
Jan012009

Wasted Cakes

If there's one thing I've learned from this blog, it's that there's a cake for everything. Vasectomies, divorces, fecal triumphs - bakeries come through where even Hallmark is left speechless. So for those of you reading this through squinted, blood-shot eyes, nursing a killer migraine, and wondering if God was actually paying attention to your 4AM porcelain-throne confessional this morning: cheer up; there's a cake for that.

Binky here is part of the new "scare 'em sober" line of cake kits. Nothing says "drink in moderation" quite like a deceased flattened clown with charred lumps for feet, right? "And that's why it's important to remember "stop, drop and roll" when doing flaming shots, boys and girls!"

Look familiar? I hope not; anyone who keeps a big mass of string cheese in their bathroom has serious hygiene issues. I'm glad the guy is labeled a "Party Animal", though: otherwise you might think this was celebrating the flu or food poisoning.

(Bonus Side Tangent Competition: Who can be the first to find me an actual cake celebrating the flu or food poisoning? C'mon; you know they're out there!)

And then there's Charlie, who shows us once and for all that you're never too old to party:

Charlie apparently likes to rock the Casbah with a couple of redskin potatoes shoved down the back of his pants. He also has a gargantuan toilet with a joystick on the seat, which he doesn't like to talk about.

[whispers] Shhh. He's sleeping. That pink shag rug and the smell of 2000 Flushes gets him every time. Aren't they just the cutest when they're dreaming?

(Yes, it's "professional". What, don't you trust me?)

Well, Happy New Year, everyone! Here's to a Wrecktastic 2009.

Thanks to Sarah N., and Stefani H.!