My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Bohemian Wrecksody

Is she a real wife,

...without the letter E?


Post-marital strife?

Buy a cake from the bakery!


Open your eyes,


Watch the monster cry,



He's just an old man!

He needs baked sympathy.


Because he's easy come,


Easy go,


Little high,


Little low!


Any kind of cake goes, as long as the batter's...


Na-il freeeeee.


Thanks to Kari Jo M., Kyla W., Jennifer L., Beth H., Randi H., Stacie B., Amanda H., Andrew H., Bronwyn G., & Sarah M. for helping me be a little mercurial. (See what I did there?)


Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.

« Friday Favs 5/15/15 | Main | Cake Secrets »

Reader Comments (33)

Sharyn, just nailed this post
Got a song stuck in her head, lesser women would have fled
Sharyn, her song's just begun
But, lack of more wrecks stopped her on this day
Sharyn, ooo ooo ooo oooh
Didn't stop to ask "No. Why?"
She never said they shouln't be baked at all
Carry on, carry on and keep writing cake based song wrecks...

May 14, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

Nail - free? what the heck does THAT even mean??? No don't answer that ... I don't really want to know...

May 14, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterAddie

...Baker...just wrecked a cake;
Piping gun up to my head,
Pulled my trigger now I'm red...
Baker--yeast had JUST begun...
But now it's gone and flattened all awaaay...!!

But you made my DAY, Sharyn!!! (Huge Queen fan!) Wreck on!

May 14, 2015 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

One of my all time favorite Queen songs!

May 14, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterBigg3469

Good lord, I'll have this song stuck in my head all day. And when I pick my son up from school, with the windows rolled down, singing this at the top of my lungs, and he refuses to climb into the car because he's so embarrassed, I'll tell him that he has Cake Wrecks to thank.

May 14, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterDegera

I LOVE this place! Sharyn starts us with a song, then SuBee and sending add the next verses...this place totally ROCKS!!! CW rules...yeah, I see what you did there with your mercurial wit!

May 14, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterVaBeach alemaP

As soon as I saw today's title I knew it was a post by Sharyn. Excellent as always!
Second cake looks like the wrecker scraped off some roses, too. *shudder* I hate to think what they looked like!
I think those sperm balloons are looking for a certain cake that made its appearance yesterday!

May 14, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterGingerSnap

Sharyn,... oooh ohh eee ooohhh
made me laugh until I cried
and you won't find the nail until tomorrow,
wre-eck on, wre-eck on
'cuz I know it's in the batter....

Queen fan here too, thank you Sharyn, you nailed it, and I'll have this song in my head alllllll day!

May 14, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterCookiemama

Find the TOENAIL?!? Gross!

May 14, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterAthena

Sharyn is Queen for a day!!

May 14, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterDiane

OK, my fellow Wreckies, we definitely need to start a Queen cover band. Theardare says we can use the bunker. (Good kitty.)

May 14, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

Ewww at the toenail one :))) Yet, I assume the customer wanted that message, so it's not the baker's fault.

May 14, 2015 | Unregistered Commenterbluefairy

OMG I just sang that in my head XD XD perfect. sendingtheclowns thanks for the additional lines :D

May 14, 2015 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

One of my favorite songs in cake form!

May 14, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterHelen

I'm just a poor wreck, nobody loves me.
Cupcakes and cakes made as monstrosities!

May 14, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterJdad

Welp...I know what song's going to be stuck in MY head for the rest of the day. :)

May 14, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterKimS

This is just genius Sharyn. Huge Queen (+AL) and CW fan. My day is complete.

May 14, 2015 | Unregistered Commentersue

Thank goodness! A Theardare reference. I've been wondering what kitty has been up to lately.

May 14, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterColin M.

And in the distance, Freddy Mercury is applauding. Well done, Sharyn and commenters!

However, I am not touching Seth's cake. Bismillah! NO! I do not want your toe! (Or your nail!) No no no no no no NO!

May 14, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterTLC

I see a little yellow plastic butterfly
Would it hert, would it hert
If my wif tried to eat it
Toenails, sperm and Muppets
Fuzzy frosting puppets, please
I’m no a**hole, I’m no a**hole
I’m no a**hole, hell no

I’m not a baker, nor a decorator
I just leave comments, I’m no wreckerator
Spare me complaints ‘bout the cakes that you have seen

Big space high, big space low. Can’t you let it go?
It’s frosting! No, we cannot let it go!
It’s fondant! No, we cannot let it go!
Will not let you go. (Let me go!)
Never, never let it go
Never let it go, oh.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Oh, It’s a cake wreck, it’s a cake wreck (It’s a cake wreck, can’t let go.)
Oh Jen and John have some more wrecks put aside for me, for me, for me.

May 14, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterNotMe

@Sharyn, @SuBee, @Sending and @Cookiemama are my new favorites! Unfortunately I look like a chipmunk today after having an abscessed tooth pulled yesterday so I just have to hum along in my feverish, pain medication induced stupor.

The Little low wreck has dead flowers on it. Like, dead, rotting flowers. Yummy! o.O

May 14, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterJodee

Sharyn, I love the idea of a Queen cover band, but does it have to be in the (dreaded) bunker? We'd have to keep Theardare plied with treats just to keep him from caterwau--I mean, SINGING-with us. =^>.<^=

May 14, 2015 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

Thunderbolts of icing, very very frightening...

May 14, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterChicago

"Sorry you hert your back old pops"
Why is that one so funny to me. LOL!!!

May 14, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterCreamsicle Badger

@Sharyn: Sure, Theardare "says"--but we'll probably have to line the bunker walls in tins of cat food for the honor!
@VaBeach alemaP: join us all at our next gig--and bring a tuning fork, lol!
@mindy1:Thanks for thanking me!
@Jodee-Aw...hope you feel better really soon, so you can join in the caterwauling-I mean "singing"!

May 14, 2015 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

For the record, that vs Ames with shifty unsteady writing are written on by non-cake decorators; either being a counter staff or staff of a different department, because the decorators had gone home for the day (shocker right?! We don't work 24/7!!!) And pushy customers insist that any writing is "fine" despite staff saying they are bad at it...
Most of these therefore don't count as cake wrecks, as the decorators did not mess them up.

May 14, 2015 | Unregistered Commenterdecorator

This post and all its comments: brilliant. Absolutely brilliant.

May 14, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterDances with Lasagna

Look again "decorator." Most of these DO count as cake wrecks as the counter staff was apparently responsible for only one.

May 14, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

Massive QUEEN fan here, this post and the following comments are awesomesauce!

May 14, 2015 | Unregistered Commenterladiebugg

All we need now is one of Mel's stories about the various bakeries he's written about.
And can Haiku Joy sum it all up in 5-7-5?

May 14, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterMarym

Lol now that song is stuck in my head along with the cakes. Will have some scary dreams tonight.. eeek especially the crying monster one. Sheesh.

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterArlene Marie

Jdad and Notme, you are geniuses. GENIUSES, I say!

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterMorag

Her quicksilver wit
Such a crazy little thing.
Now we'll hum all day.

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterJoJo

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