The REST of the Story

"Welcome to the K. Krex Evaluation Center! Please have a seat, and we'll begin the exam.

[consulting clipboard] "Ok, let's start by having you cover your left eye and spell out the top line here."

"Uhhh.... M. d. W. 2. K. 1. O?"

"Perfect. Now go ahead and read me the bottom word here."

"Oh man, that's tough. Um...matheridby?"

"Good, good. Now, please cover your right eye and spell out the letters on the bottom line here."

"N... O... T.. T.. P.. P.. L.. B.. S.. S.. S.. S.. L?"

[writing on clipboard] "Mmmhmm. Now, kindly read this for me:"

{squinting} "Uhhh.... Is that even English?"

"Excellent. Moving on, now I'm going to change the lenses over your eye. Tell me which is more in focus:

"Number one...

"...or number two?"

"Gosh, I don't know. They look about the same."

"I see. Ok, for our final test, let's have you put on these glasses and try reading these:"

"Happy....Bir....um... I have no idea what that says."

"And I'd rather not say that one out loud."

"Oh! That's the artist formerly known as Prince, right?"

"Well done. And congratulations - you're hired! Here are your apron and piping bags, and you can pick up your spools of ribbon and plastic flotsam in the morning. Now, go make us proud!

"And a bunch of cupcake cakes."

Thanks to Brandon D., Rosie, Melissa M., Becky, Rebecca M., Sara B., Judy R., Abby M., and Grace N. for the eye-openers.

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot:

John's Precious Submissions

Jen's been sick in bed today, and was so out of it this morning that she asked ME to write a post. This is john (the hubby of Jen), btw.

And so I present to you:

"What happens when John writes a post (mostly) unsupervised." 

Or,

Fun Fact: that is the face I make when I check your emails.

Speaking of ducks, Abigail sent in this cake from a going-away party.

In her words: "I don't know what a 'hood duck' is, but I imagine it is some sort of hood ornament for a special migration vehicle."

Which of course made me wonder if there was a duck hood ornament...

And of course there is.

(I'm getting Darkwing Duck-as-a-Sumo-Wrestler vibes here.)

*****

Amber writes: "I told the local bakery that I wanted half of my cupcakes to say ‘Dirty 30’ and the other half to say ‘34’"

Huh. Tell me, Amber, did you have to halve half of the "have" cupcakes?

English is fun.

(Jen would like it to be known that this gif was her sole contribution for today.)

*****

Next up, Wendy brought in a picture of the cake she wanted.

Because that always ends well.

On the plus side, I can show you both the picture Wendy brought in AND the cake she got in one shot:

But wait, THERE'S MORE.

I went looking for Wendy's original photo on Google Image Search, since I couldn't tell what the blue lump was. I found this:

It's like the road untraveled, Wendy! A different, darker timeline! LOOK WHAT COULD HAVE BEEN.

(I'm still not entirely sure, but I think the blue lumps are legs.)

(Also if you search for "blue legs gif" you won't be disappointed.)

*****

And now for something... completely different.

Rachel discovered what happens when a wreckerator gets a job in the neon sign business:

As Rachel says, "I’m just hoping they got a deal on the sign."

You and me both, Rachel.

Thanks to Abigail H., Amber S., Wendy K., & Rachel G., who are all welcome to join me for some Thai cuisine. Or a Thai crusurel. One of the two.

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot: