You'll Never Guess What These Were Supposed To Be...

WARNING: Gratuitous, often incomprehensible wang innuendo ahead.

No, no. GUESS:

It's NOT a uterus. Or a ruptured trouser weasel. Scout's honor.

Give up?

It's an exploding thermometer. Like this:

Yep. THAR SHE BLOWS.

This is ALSO not a one-eyed zipper splitter (with accompanying cherry pit):

Nope, it's a kite.

Remember, my friends, no man is an island.

But sometimes his inflatable leg nose is.

We sure see a lot of "balloons" that look more like doggy-paddlin' miracle grow:

(Doggy-paddlin' to freedom.)

...but sometimes the balloons get a bit more... nutty.

Great gobs of pendulous plum pillows!

Whoever did this should be sacked.

Hey, speaking of balls:

Never make Dad the butt of his own cookie cake.

And finally, a self-rising lap baguette the baker was so proud of, she had to put a ribbon on it:

The three "fun-slinger" salute was also a nice touch.

(Although once you see it, the green "slung" bits get pretty dang disturbing.)

Thanks to the appropriately named Phyllis B., Alicia W., Christina M., Jessica N., Kristine C., Lauren B., Sheree K., & Charlie for just being happy to see these wrecks, and not having any butterfly cakes in their pockets.

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I typed in my favorite phrase from this post ("inflatable leg nose") into Amazon just to see what would come up, and you guys, I was not disappointed:

Amazon calls it an "Inflatable Body Suit," but we all know it's for horsing around.

By the by, did you know that anything you purchase through my crazy Amazon links each day helps support the site? 'Cuz it does! So thank you for being awesome.

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot:

10 Drop Dead Gorgeous Cakes For Dia de los Muertos

Did you know Day of the Dead is actually celebrated for several days, and starts this Thursday?

We're starting extra early here on Sweets, though, because I have so many gorgeous cakes to show you! Even if you don't celebrate Dia de los Muertos, trust me, these beauties bring plenty of sugar skulls and eye candy to sweeten your Halloween:

 (De Un Bocado, Spain)

WOW. Anyone else want to dress up as this cake now? The flowers alone have me swooning!

(Flour Power Cakery, California)

The colors, you guys. ALL THE GORGEOUS COLORS. And look at that hand-piped "embroidery" - incredible!

There are lots of Day of The Dead wedding cakes out there, in fact, and some of them make skeletons look positively adorable:

(Three Tiers For Cake, North Carolina)

D'awww. Plus those cute pom-poms!

Here comes an extra dapper sugar skull:

(Baker unknown. Anyone?)

I never would have thought to add purple to this color scheme, but WOW do I like it.

Speaking of colors, here's another wedding cake in one of my favorite combos:

(Twiggs Bakery, California)

Teal and red!

They're just so retro and happy together.

Although we all know teal and orange is my OTP:

(Sugar Song Cake, Arizona)

These marigolds are so fluffy looking and vibrant, I can't get enough.

Most Day of the Dead cakes are almost neon they're so bright, but I'm also loving this more muted - but just as gasp-worthy - wedding design:

(Bakers Cottage Cakes, Florida)

Definitely a more Gothic feel overall, and WOW.

Can't celebrate Day of the Dead without giving Disney's Coco a shout-out:

(Alba's Cake Studio, California)

Pretty safe to say anyone who's cried their way through this movie will remember it. I love the little candles and picture frame!

And speaking of Disney-fied Day of the Dead cakes... how about this?

(Little Cherry Cake Company, England)

Star Wars meets Dia de los Muertos! Ha! Of course I love this - and of course, YOU KNOW.

This last showstopper is so stunning I want to put her under glass and just stare at her all year long:

(Il Mondo Di Ielle, Italy)

I think maybe she's contrasting the night vs day? From the vibrancy of a Dia de los Muertos night to the pale light of morning? That's just a guess, though.

 However you interpret it, this is absolutely gorgeous, and I'd never be able to cut it.

Wishing all of you who celebrate a wonderful Day of the Dead this weekend, and a happy Halloween!

*****

P.S. There's still time to get a pretty floral headpiece for next weekend. JUST SAYING. 

I already have a pretty rainbow one, but I'm eyeing this one next:

Day of the Dead Headband

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot: