Stop And Smell The Clichés

Normally I avoid clichés like the plague.

Still, when it comes to buying a cake, sometimes you've got to grab the bull by the horns.

(Just don't grab the other end.)

See, I'll bet you dollars to donuts:

... that some of you are going to get wrecks.

You may think you have all your ducks in a row:

(or maybe to be rowed...)

... but let's face it: There's a good chance the baker's ...

... a poo ant short of a picnic.

And they might get your cake ...

... bass ackwards.

I mean, does a bear ...

 ... sit in the woods?

(Aw, Pooh.)

;)

Look, you're probably never going to get the baker to eat crow:

So don't make a tempest in a teapot!

(Actually, don't make anything in this teapot.)

After all, you've still got a cake, and maybe the manager will mark it down.

So rather than look a gift horse in the, uh ...

... gaping mouth nozzle of despair?

... just enjoy your cake.

I think Shakespeare put it best:

"That which they call a rose by any other name...

"... still looks like meat."

Thanks to Scott D., Deanna C., Laura M., Wolfie W., Anna M., Autumn J., Reba S., Jesea J., Lana H., and Maria V.  for letting us have their cakes and read them, too.

*****

P.S. If you need a drink after those cakes, then I have JUST the game for you:

"These Cards Will Get You Drunk" Party Game

And since I have the constitution of a dizzy squirrel, I propose an alternate version where instead of drinking we eat whoopie pies. Any seconds?

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And from my other blog, Epbot:

Up All Night To Get "Lucky"

Ok, guys, I think it's time to go over the "guidelines" again for wishing someone good luck.

Sooo...

Well? Are ya, punk?

EXCELLENT.

Now,

Rule The First: Pick ONE sentiment and go with it.

It's either "Good Luck" or possibly "Get Lucky." Or, in this case, maybe "Get Lumpy." Heh.

(Anyone else want to stab that giant bump before it scurries away?)

Rule The Second: Watch your handwriting.

Believe it or not, a cursive capital L is the single most difficult letter in the entire known universe to write:

Which is probably why this baker tried for a cursive capital Q instead; sure, it looks bad, but at least it doesn't spell anything embarrassing:

Gentlemen, start your engines.

Of course, even if you nail the L, there's still that pesky U to contend with:

o.0

Yowza, "best of suck" and "good lick?" How much dirtier can an innocuous "good luck" cake get?!

I had to ask, didn't I.

Which brings us to:

Rule The Third: Mixing botched cursive letters with printed

ones is a sure-fire recipe for disaster.

Hilarious, awkward disaster:

Yeah, Christina. Try not to screw that up.

Thanks to Bethany P., Gail K., Jodee R., Kristine W., Amy S., Tracy M., & Christina W., who would not believe how often I see dirty good luck cakes. Or, ok, maybe you would.

*****

::shaking head:: All these cakes trying to say goodbye, when I've got you covered right here:

7-Ft "Later Traitor" Party Banner

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot: