The All-Male Wreck Review

[Note: Mildly risque jokes & images ahead. And one banana hammock.]

We all live in fear of an embarrassing photo popping up on Facebook, but it turns out there's an even WORSE place for those best-forgotten candids to turn up:

Your birthday cake.

(And, ok, yeah -  then on an internationally-known blog about bad cakes, but still.)

I used to think edible photos were the worst invention since the Steering Wheel Desk, but that was before I realized their true purpose:

Humiliating drunk guys who take their clothes off.

 Yep, edible images are the best thing to happen to passive-aggression since the Post-It note. How else can you get back at the guy who showed up early, drank all the Zima, and then passed out in your mom's favorite arm chair and peed himself?

Remember, revenge is a dish best served iced - and there is a lot of icing...IN CAKE.

I would comment on the misspellings, but it's hard to concentrate with big nipples staring you in the face.

Which I guess explains why employers block so much of the Internet at work, huh? 

(HEYO.)

 Of course, not all guys need alcohol to get a little frisky in front of the camera:

Must. Not. Make. "Horny." Joke...

And once you hit your ninety-something-th birthday, I know exactly what you want to see:

Not bad, not bad...but can we get some kind of a wild cat in here? And maybe a mullet?

Purrrfect.

I feel like we're straying off the drunken path, though. See, what we *really* need is something with a clown wig, a little Crisco, and a HUGE...

...oh. Rats.

Ok, never mind.

Thanks to Angie B., Kimberly E., Julie C., Christy M., Stacey H., Sarah T., Katherine M. & Aaron for the full Monte Crisco. It was delicious.

******

P.S. In the interest of restoring some dignity to the male wardrobe, I found you these socks with giant wieners on them:

Men's Casual Novelty Sock Collection

The 8-pack is $20, but the corny joke potential? Well, that's priceless.

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot:

Like, Whatever

Transcript of the actual conversation of the Loud Girl talking on her phone in the next booth last night at dinner...

"So, like, I was at work today, and my boss Bob comes up to me, y'know, and he's all like,

"Did you finish that project I gave you last week?"

"And I, like, totally forgot about it, so I'm thinking, like,

But I don't say that. I'm all

And he's just, y'know, looking at me, so I say

And he just stands there, so I go

And he rolls his eyes and looks at me, and he says,

I know.

And I say, what, like you never missed a deadline? Oh, I know, that's cuz

right, Bob?

And I'm getting, like, totally pissed that he thinks he can treat me like that, so I'm just all,

and I walked out.

Yeah, I know! Good for me!

Now I'm like

I didn't want to be a lawyer anyway."

Really, like, epic thanks to Sheryl L., Ellen B., Lexi R., Katherine B., Sam B., Allison W., Amy O., Bruce T., Julia R., and Laura D. I love you guys. You really get me.

*****

P.S. Parents, I don't know if your kids will love this Easter ring toss game or see it as some kind of humiliating punishment... but either way I see potential:

Inflatable Bunny Ears Ring Toss Game (3 Sets)

Plus you get 3 sets!

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot: