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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Thursday
Nov132008

Face Time On CW

This is so exciting, everyone: I had no idea there were Doctor Who fans in the Walmart bakery! Check this out:


How cool is that, huh? It's totally Lady Cassandra O'Brien Dot Delta Seventeen!

[crickets chirping]

What?

[Pin dropping. Loudly.]

What's with all the blank looks? Are you guys telling me you don't know who Cassandra O'Brien Dot Delta Seventeen is? Really?

Oh.

Well, here, she looks like this:

See, she's a human from the future, and she's had so much plastic surgery that there's nothing left but her face. Get it? (Really, I don't see how you guys survive without this kind of quality programming in your lives.)

Ok, now go look at that "cake" again, and tell me it's not her. Go on.

Hm? Oh. Yeah, I guess you do have a point: she doesn't have eyebrows. Or a nose. Or weird purply hair tufts. Or antennae. But if that's not supposed to be Cassandra O'Brien Dot Delta Seventeen, then I'm going to go out on a limb here and say maybe the Walmart in question should consider employee drug screening. Not that I'm implying anything by that, of course - nosirree.

Thomas R., you thought it was her, too - right?

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Reader Comments (237)

That is TOTALLY Lady Cassandra! Moisturize her!

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterdocgrumbles

As if I weren't already terrified of Wal-mart.

Gee. Thanks.

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterPersnickety Ticker

I love you and your blog more and more each day, for bringing together two of my most favorite things: Doctor Who and baked goods gone wrong.

Now if we can just find the TARDIS in fondant...

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterwenzday18

That's ... wow.

Just wow.

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered Commenteryousuckatcraigslist

Anyone else see lambchop...like the shari lewis puppet?!

i hope im not goign crazy here lol

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered Commenteribesnag

I'm glad you went out on a limb for us on this one. Especially, since neither the cake or and "bitchy trampoline" seems to have any.

Are those purple things sunglasses? Is she supposed to be a cloud? A little happy cloud for that painting guys birthday?

I should watch the new Who. The old one with it's $5 prop budget used to crack me up.

word verification menforna...should be malforma for the cake

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterHavocec

I don't care who it looks like (or doesn't) - what really freaks me out is that they would charge $20 for it! They should pay ME to take it home and throw it in the garbage. Yikes!

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterKandiB

Someone needs to get this cake some tweezers. Seriously.

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterErica

Now, a David Tennant cake, I would enjoy.

*yummmy*

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered Commentererin k

HAHAHAHA!! I do see lady Cassandra!

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMrs. Wentz

Hey Cassandra would have certainly been My first thought, too!

"Moisturize me! Moisturize me!!!"
B*tchy trampoline... :D :P
(Ladyfox7oaks, over here from the LJ/RSS feed)

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Oh god, you do NOT want to look for Who cakes. Well, actually maybe you do - there are some pretty great wrecks out there. But they're mostly home-made from what I've seen so not nearly as hilarious.

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterTracy

I know who she is! And another Who-ite <3 She does in fact look like Cassandra AND Zoe Wannamaker - who played Cassandra........

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterTracy

Dr. Who=Best sci-fi schow ever!!!
Well, maybe not ever. I am overly fond of anything Joss Whedon.
And that cake totally looks like her. It was the first thing I thought when I saw the picture. Before I read the post.

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterKatieDoyle

I totally knew who she was, and you're right, that's totally her. Scary!

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterArcher

Looks like the Wal Mart bakery manager needs to revoke that creative license...

Maybe this is a signal from the lone Dr. Who fan in WalMart begging for rescue.

Moisturize me!

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterReam O Rama

Woohoo! Fellow Who fan! And yes, saw it right away.

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterScott

The minute I saw the picture, I immediately thought of Cassandra! I'm still convinced it's her...

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterCody Melcher

Oh my gosh! I laughed right out loud - I actually thought it was Cassandra before even reading your description/comparison. NICELY DONE!

All I can say is those cakes better be MOIST!

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterStacy

You have reached a new level of awesome with the Doctor Who reference!

As for the cake...yeah, totally Cassandra.

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLisa

No way, you're totally wrong! It's clearly made by a fan of French techno music producer Sebastian's recent EP Cover:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/collective/dnaimages/gallery/2/edbanger/6.jpg

I'm just kidding, you had me at the first sentence actually. Cake Wrecks + Doctor Who = Made my day!

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterProfessorJesse

im going to have nightmares about this cake and that picture from Dr. Who.

Who would ever buy that?!

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLaurie

Moisturize her! Ha! That is hilarious. As soon as you said "Doctor Who" I saw Lady Cassandra.

But WHY would anybody want a cake of an evil, body-stealing, plastic-surgery-obsessed character?

Why not a TARDIS? How hard would a TARDIS be to make out of cake? I would like to see Ace of Cakes do that one.

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterKaren

That's creepy. I never watched Dr. Who, but after seeing that my interest is piqued. Was Cassandra a big player in that show? Seriously... what was that cake supposed to be?

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJacqui

It looked like a strange cow to me.

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMelodi

Hopefully this cake explodes just like she did :P

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterBreeAnn

I agree with other's that is totally the Face of Bo. The heavy eyebrows, the big lips, the purple life support tubing . . .

All it needs is a little cat cupcake on the side . . .

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterPeggy

Doctor Who is everywhere. And I love it!

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterKate

Hmmmmmmmm. I confess I had never heard of Lady Cassandra, but I did Google her after reading the comments. Now, I'm even more confused.

However, I think this cake sorta kinda resembles the Jason's ship (the bow of the ship shaped liked a woman) from Jason and the Argonauts. It's supposed to be Honor Blackman (Hera). Anyway. That's what I think

I cannot imagine anyone paying $20.00 for this wreck. Man. What a ripoff!

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMaryO

The picture came up and my mind immediately thought 'Doctor Who'! Then I scrolled down and the smile spread across my face.
This is truly a good day. One of my favorite blogs references one of my favorite shows.

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJanet

It looks like Toni Basil from the end of the Mickey video; that was my first thought.

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAidan

I must see the Daleks cake, if only to finally use the following joke.

Wait for it....

"Extermi-cake!"

Get it? It's like "Exterminate"...

you people are lame.

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterCarrieTown

It looks like "Spidaris" from the Miss Spider cartoon.

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterTheOtherJennifer

Good Lord...
They're both highly disturbing!

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterChatRabbit

Don't worry. I got it. :]

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterjamie

totally got the reference and agreed with you. The fact that you're a Who fan has just made me even more in love with this blog. But what was that face suppose to be for real? Did yhe person who submitted it have any answers?

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterzann

I totally thought of Cassandra too!!

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJJ Sobey

I think the funniest part of the whole thing is that they're charging $19.48 for it!

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Um... I don't know why but it looks like Bjork to me.

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Awesome! I love the Dr. Who reference! Cassandra as a cake? She'd be more appropriate as a crepe. :)

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterstephs

Who else could it be?
Hahaha, so bad, really.

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterEll

It is reminiscent of Cassandra, scary!

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMK

that purple stuff sorta looks like sunglasses pushes up on her cupcake forhead

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAmy McMean a.k.a McSunshine

Not only do I know who Cassandra is, I am sitting not 2 feet from an action figure of her (or should that be an inaction figure?) We are knee deep in Daleks and Sea Devils too.

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLoth

Bwahaha! And you can "explode" the cake to eat her! Love it. LOVE IT. Although MY favorite Cassandra incarnation is when she's David Tennant. Hilarious. I pee myself laughing every time.

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLiz

That is the ugliest cake I have ever seen. I think it may even top the birth one.

Angie.

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered Commenter..::Angel::..

I think those purple things on her head are supposed to be sunglasses.

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterCarrie and Michael Brown

The cake doesn't even care that it's on cake wrecks. Is it bothered? Look at its face. Face; look; bothered? It ain't bothered!
(Apologies to the Catherine Tate Show)
~Melanie

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMelanie B.

Um. Is it the evil spider villain from Miss Spider's Sunny Patch Kids??

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered Commentermrs. q.

Hooray for the Doctor! Does the cake need constant moisturizing, though?

November 13, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAlice

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