My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen


Believe it or not, this cake is supposed to look like this:

Well, sort of, anyway.

That deer is staring straight into my soul, and it's totally creeping me out. The smoke column on the side is kind of odd, too, although I like the idea of using sprinkles for ash.

And what could be better than a cake with a demonic deer staring out from the fiery depths? How about one that was sold in California when all the wild fires were raging? Yep. Niiice.

Or, to Wreck it up further, you could always have a dial-a-wreck inscription on it:

That's supposed to say, "Happy Birthday you old bastard". So obviously the wonky heart was the decorator's idea. "Let's see, demonic deer, unintelligible greeting, still needs something...."

Oh, wait, that smoke column was supposed to be a tree? Huh. Well, I guess if all the leaves were burned off...

Jenna Z. and Rya M., these cakes are smokin'.

« I've Heard of Death Taking a Holiday, But This is Ridiculous | Main | Cake Headlines »

Reader Comments (162)

I first thought it said "Happy Birthday, your old postcard."

Which makes about as much sense.les

November 7, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous


And was I the only one who read the inscription on the second cake to be 'Happy Birthday your old postcard' and trying to figure out what the heck THAT was supposed to mean???

November 7, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJulianne

Oh, lord. It took me until now to realize that wasn't SUPPOSED to be fire. LOLZ.

November 7, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I don't think it is suppose to be fire but grass that has gone yellow and a tree with leaves that are turning color. The second one even has real leaves on it so you can see.

It looks exactly like a hunting scene to me.

November 7, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

the deer in the second one looks so much better, but why is he being burned? *sob*


November 7, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLily

See, the funny thing is that when I first looked at it, all I saw was "FU". And then I realized that that was a buck. It took me another couple of seconds to realize that was suppose to be a tree?

November 7, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The first thing I saw in the first one was F U

November 7, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAdrienne

Maybe the cake giver was the "old bastard". That would explain the heart too. Like they signed it with a pet name. Maybe. But with the misspelling of bastard, I doubt it.

November 7, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAislinn K

I laughed so hard I cried! Keep up the great work, Jen, and I'll go buy a huge box of Kleenex.


November 7, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

My son's birthday is Tuesday and there is a sick and twisted part of me that hopes his WALL•E cake is a hot mess. This is wrong, of course, as he's only going to be 6 and probably wouldn't find it nearly as hysterical as I would.

November 7, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterintothethickofit

This is like the vase/face picture. I pull up cake wrecks and see a smiling deer on fire. Do a double-take and see a deer in alien world's meadow (you know, on a planet where the sky is green and yellow and the tall grass is strangely thick and the trees are like post-modern art). I see both bambi flambe and alien deer.

The second one is just weird. I read it as "Your old, Pastard" Maybe someone is telling the deer he's old and they plan on burning him alive now that he's outlived his usefulness?

November 7, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterTobias

Y'all have to start reading other people's comments before making your won... There's about 3 people who have already asked "Am I the only one who read it as 'your old postcard' first?". No, you are not the only one--if you had taken 2 minutes to check you would have known this.

I can't count how many people have pointed out that the cakes are supposed to show deer in tall autumn grass rather than in an inferno, as though no one else had already made this observation. YES. WE KNOW.

November 7, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJessie

I'm having a San Diego '07 flashback!

November 7, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterTee

I would take great offense at being called a pastard. Was this a mistake or did the decorator have a problem with writing the word?

And is it just me or does the deer in the second one seem happier?

November 7, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterWhat's Her Face

Postard...someone who was a tard but is now not?

I dunno...I don't like cakes with eyes on them.

Or OT, ice cream cones filled with icing.

November 7, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterHavocec

I am constantly amazed how often the word "you" is misspelled on the cakes that get featured. I difficult is it to spell a 3-letter word?!

November 7, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterEpiphany

I used to work as a grocery store bakery cake decorator. I have made that cake kit before. The deer is a plastic magnet. The brown lines are supposed to be a tree with fall leaves (done with icing, not sprinkles) and that is supposed to be tall dry grass. I don't have a photo as evidence, but my execution of the cake was actually very nice, well, nice for a deer cake. Here's a link to a site that sells the kit, along with a photo of the cake that decorators are supposed to copy:

November 7, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

"You Old Postcard"? The heck is that supposed to mean??

November 7, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterCalantha

The grass that looks like fire doesn't bother me as much as the sprinkles on the tree. Are those supposed to be leaves?! What tree has leaves that turn blue and white in autumn?!

November 8, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterTB Tabby

I'm so glad I'm not the only one who saw the F U on the first cake.

No, FU!

November 8, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Am I the only one who thinks it actually says "YOUR"? As in, "Happy Birthday Your old Pastard". Could it be saying something like "Happy Birthday! Love from Your Old Pastard" I know, it still makes no sense whatsoever. But I do think I see a definite R there at the end of that word.

November 8, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMidnight Ramblings

. . . so even the people who sell the deer head magnet agree that the deer is supposed to be on fire?

You guys have to click that link. The ad shows a deer staring blankly out above "grass" that is blaze orange with sinuous red cores. FLAMES, FLAMES on the side of its FACE . . .

November 8, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Is it terrible that all I can manage to see on that first cake is F U???

November 8, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterSarahB

Jessie, do y'all realize that messages are posted online in groups, that Jen or Mr Jen approve them before they are posted? So many times previous comments are *not* visible when another one is posted saying the same thing.

November 8, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

And who wouldnt want a scary red eyed deer on a cake??

November 8, 2008 | Unregistered Commentersearching_for_something

What kind of pastard can't even spell you without putting an r on the end? Seriously?!

November 8, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMs Unreliable

I have been checking back on these comments throughout the day and I can assure you, the comments I was referring to were definitely visible early enough for many of the repeat-information commentators.

November 8, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJessie

I've mad this cake before. I hope that mine have never looked this bad.

November 8, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Yes, as some have noted, it says:

Happy Birthday
[heart = love] your Old Pastard

Hence, a cake FROM the Pastard, not to to him. Mystery solved.

Next question: so who does the Pastard love?

November 8, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I used to decorate cakes at a grocery store. The deer head is a magnet. The "fire" is actually supposed to be like prairie grass in the fall. This is how the cake is supposed to look:

I always hated making this cake. If you love frosting this is your cake! All that grass (or fire lol) is a lot of frosting.

November 8, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterRenee

ROFL!!!!!!! What a tacky cake!!

November 8, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I'm inclined to believe Jessie, who insisted "I can assure you, the comments I was referring to were definitely visible early enough for many of the repeat-information commentators."

That's just the nature of humanity.

"What I want to say is important, but I won't bother to first read what others have said."

Ah, the internet...gotta love it.

November 8, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The top one looks like it says F U.
love it.

November 8, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterskankassbitch

So... do those antlers look like chicken feet to anyone else? Just me? OK, then.

I see the FU in the top cake also. Hilarious.

November 8, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterEEEEEK!!

I, honest to G-d, thought that Smokey The Bear had been replaced by some random deer and this was a cake advertising fire awareness.

How else can one possibly describe why a harmless deer is being engulfed by fire? In nice Thanksgiving colours. All packaged up for that fantastic Monday morning meeting with staff.

I'm horrified to think of the small children going up to the glass to smoosh their noses next to the cookies and cakes and seeing their new firewise friend being burnt like some 4th of July hotdog.

Rest in Peace Bambi. Rest in Peace.

November 8, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJenP

I'm glad I'm not the only one who saw the "F U" in the first cake. I'm shocked that only a few people noticed it. It's the only thing I can see every time I look at it!

November 9, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The next time I buy a cake for anyone, for any reason, I want it to have "Happy birthday, your old postcard" written on it. This HAS to happen.

November 9, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterjaw

I must have done too many rebus puzzles as a child--I read it as "Happy Birthday, your "dear" old postard."

November 9, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The first dear cake, when I saw it I thought it said F U (The F being the tree, the U being the deer antlers)

November 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterDonna

So is this where evil deer go after I run them over with my car?

Deer Hell?

November 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJon

i'm going to start calling everyone a pastard. it reminds me of a kind of mustardy bastard. which seems worse than just the regular kind of bastard.

(i got nothing.)

November 10, 2008 | Unregistered Commenteralicia

Yes, the deer's antlers look like chicken feet. Or like fat fingers with those black Halloween fake-nails attached.

I officially have The Willies.

November 10, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterbizarrogirl

Did anyone else see "F U" on the original picture (the tree branches make the F, and the deer's horns form the U)? Are they trying to tell us something?

November 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Pastard? Pastard? Hahahahahahahahaha!

November 11, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterKanani

I showed this to my co-worker, who is a hunter, and his remark was, "I can’t help but think that the antlers look like Chernobyl chicken feet or something."

November 11, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnna

the first cake kind of at first glance looked like it says "F u" the F obviously in the shape of the sad tree/smoke stack area....and the antlers of the deer are kind of shaped like a U...well ok maybe my eyes just see what they want to see.

November 12, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterflutterbyegirl72

That first cake looks like it says, "F-U"!

November 14, 2008 | Unregistered Commentermamadance

I work at Baskin Robbins and the decorating company we go through has this available.

In the 4 years I've been decorating, I don't remember anyone actually ordering it. Surprised much? Haha

Adrian W.

November 23, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAdrian

ok so after talking to my husband he says we have this cake all wrong... he is a deer hunter and he says that it looks more like a tree on the left in autumn hence the multi colored sprinkles and dots of icing. That my also be why it's brown... and he says if you notice the "flames" are all yellowish in color...kind of like a wheat field where deer like to eat. I mean I will say if it is a wheat field shame on them for making it look like flames...but I think my husband might be right about this one.

November 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterChrista

haha, what i don't understand is... one deer burning in a forest fire on a cake is pretty hilarious and weird, but why are there two?? is "deer burning in a fire with a tree on the left" a commonly requested cake theme for some reason...?

December 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJ

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