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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Thursday
Oct152009

Teasers for the Coming Seasons

There's nothing like the holiday season to put bakers in "the mood" - uh, to decorate cakes, of course. ;)

Why, last year we had so much fabulous Wreckage submitted from October through January that I couldn't get them posted fast enough! So here's a little sneak peek at what Wreckerators may have in store for you the next few months.

Halloween has its "monsters":

Gee, Frankenstein certainly looks hard up.

Thanksgiving has its "turkeys":

Outlines: making the vaguely suggestive so much more specifically nutty.

And "Winter" has...er...these things:

"Bat those baby blues at me all you want: I will NOT turn the photo around!"

Jill P., Anony M., & Barbara R., I would salute you, but these Wrecks beat me to it.

- Related Wreckage: Seasonal Non Sequiturs

Note from John: Wondering where yesterday's post went? Check out today's comments section.

« Oh What a Difference a Letter Can Bake | Main | Erring on the Side of Caution...Is Still Erring »

Reader Comments (196)

The bride should have scribbled out the ninja throwing star that looked like a swastika when she gave the baker the example images.

But that doesn't let the bakery off the hook. The piping work was amateurish and it looked nothing like the sample lace cake. I would have considered it a minor wreck (considering it was done by a professional bakery) even without the swastikas. I decorate cakes for my niece's birthday every year and I think I'm terrible at it, and that looked like something I could've done.

October 15, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMoxie

Odd thing is that I just came from the "It's a Cock" blog, and thought that I was back at that site. I had to double check the address.

October 15, 2009 | Unregistered Commenteranotherfascist

Oh, that turkey cake is the cutest cupcake cake I ever did see! Great use of color and the circle shape, why is it ...

oh.

OH! OH MY!

Well, it's just like the little mermaid movie scandel.
Remember those lovely castle spires? Or the wedding priest who had an obvious hard on during the ceremony. Oh, good time. Obviously REALLY good times.

Love the comments about yesterday's post. It really helps me understand why I didn't get cake yesterday. I NEED MY CAKE!

October 15, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDiagnose Rachel

I am glad you took the post down. While the cake itself fit the site, I was very disappointed that CW made this woman's contact information readily available (via the link to the mom's blog) so that other's were free to torment and harass her. It's all fun and games until someone loses an eye (or their job).

Fortunately that baker owns her own business, but had this been my mistake, the publicity would likely have lost me my job.

I would laugh if one of my cakes landed here, but not so much if you provided my name and employer information. I hope in the future you won't be doing that.

October 15, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKirsti

John & Jen,

Though I didn't get an opportunity to see yesterday's original post, based on your description of it all, you did the right thing. And don't ever feel like you will lose integrity by doing the right thing. If people lose respect for you for standing up for what you believe is the right thing to do, that's their own issue. Bravo & Brava to you both!

October 15, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTara and Kyle

Kirsti,

It's actually kind of tough. Include the link so that people know the story is real, and you risk getting the baker in trouble. Don't include the link and everyone complains it's fake all day. Ahh well.

We really didn't think it would get as bad as it did. And I hope you know that we never intentionally link to a a baker unless it's Sunday Sweets.

john

October 15, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterjohn (the hubby of Jen)

For everyone who (like me) missed the cake controversy yesterday there's a picture here: http://community.eharlequin.com/content/cake-wrecks-really

Others have posted the yelp link to the baker's side.

I think that taking it down was the right thing to do. The baker clearly just followed directions and meant no offense, although I think that in any profession we have set limits on what we'll do for a customer. The bride is clearly also to blame for sending the sheet with the symbols. Obviously nobody meant any harm or offense and anyone who writes hate mail to a baker over something like this needs to watch the news for more deserving targets.

Keep the wrecks coming!

October 15, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterkathleen

Love, love, love you. Love your blog. Prayed for you through your recent trials. Having said all that... the phallic symbol posts are getting really, really old. Please raise the level of class on this otherwise amazing (my favorite) family-friendly blog. I really hate to criticize and do love Cake Wrecks dearly. But please consider putting this category to rest for a while.

October 15, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

About yesterday...

I feel you did the right thing regarding yesterday's post. After reading all that I did, it seemed to me like an unfortunate and embarrassing misunderstanding - certainly not some diabolical plan.

Aside from the obvious, I felt it was the mother of the bride who was truly offensive and not the baker. She has every right to be upset that she and her daughter didn't get the cake they wanted and paid for, but her slandering of the baker and comments in her blog insinuating that "goth, alternative, or whatever else holds for wacky these days" couples would be happy with nazi swastikas on their wedding cakes were ignorant and upsetting.

I realize this was her personal blog, but every one of us needs to realize that ANYTHING we post online is PUBLIC, and we should think twice about what we type.

So, bravo Cake Wrecks for caring about integrity while still being hilarious!

October 15, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Wrecks that say "eat me!"
Here are more stick jokes than you can shake a dick at.

wv: fessit

I'm going to have to fessit this cocky haiku in a fessit box.

October 15, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

I don't know if you realized this or not, but those cakes look like they have frosting penises on them.

;)

October 15, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHeidi 'n' Jeff

OK, the cake drama is over... John, how are you feeling?

October 16, 2009 | Unregistered Commentermandi

I'm just going to say, in Lorelai Gilmore fashion, "Dirty!" : )

October 16, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKristen

Mandi,

Actually I got back to Orlando from Dallas and went right back into the hospital with an infected lung. Bummer. I'm out now and feeling much better. Looking forward to finishing the tour. The cough should go away withing a few years;}

Thanks for asking!

john

October 16, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterjohn (the hubby of Jen)

That monster looks like Thomas the Train with a bad case of the stomach flu!

October 16, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda

I randomly ran in to an article about this site and tried to quietly cry (from laughing so hard) at work. Thanks for adding a little humor to my day,

October 16, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterReelyne

Re: the swastika cake, it's a shame that everyone fixated on the swastika, because the real crime was just the cake. I'm not the first person to say this, but WHAT LACE PATTERN? A 10-year-old with a frosting kit from the grocery store could have done the decorating job on that thing, and it sounds like the bakers are pulling things from photostreams to make it seem like they've done work that they haven't. Okay, maybe the customer inadvertently provided the swastika. That doesn't excuse the rest of it, which was a hot mess. And if you look at the other Yelp reviews, it sounds like this bakery has a real problem with consistency and customer service (not writing on the cake correctly, and other vaguely wrecktastic categories of offense) and then claiming that it was all the customer's fault. So I have to say, I'd take that little Yelp explanation they posted with the proverbial grain of salt. I don't know. Hate mail is obviously inappropriate and lame, but maybe these people need to learn to take the heat if they're going to decorate a really bad cake in their kitchen and then charge someone money for it.

Personally, I just ordered a bunch of different kinds of dessert, undecorated, from Finale in Cambridge. The photo op wasn't as good, but the cakes were better, and I think that it's probably one of my top ten pieces of advice to the newly engaged.

October 16, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterShannon Chamberlain

Oh my gosh! I laughed so hard I almost peed.

October 16, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMeghan

Thank you Mandi for asking out loud, and thank you John for answering, and there is nothing Wreckier than hospital food. (Warm, diabetic no-sugar Superball-strong jello. Shiver.) Stay well, and thank you for all the laughs here!

October 16, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAlisonH

I can see that turkey's giblets. Tehehehe!

October 16, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterWolvie Girl

Oh WOW. These are freaking HILARIOUS. Either the bakers have no clue whatsoever, or these are partly intentional. *snerk*

October 16, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterXJ

Re: yesterday's post, it wasn't cool for people to send hate mail, but like many have said, that was a WRECK! They should've called it the Zapf Dingbats cake. All that was missing was the Euro symbol. There was no subtle ninja stars or even blatant ninja stars for that matter. One would think if they weren't sure what a ninja star looks like and the sample the customer gave was questionable, either do as they say and just make it lace (which there was none) or look it up on Google. And putting plastic ninjas on the cake didn't help.

October 16, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Eeeeew! The images are bad enough, but combined with the colours! Pass the sick bag.

October 16, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDrawn to Caricature

To the uplifting cakes in today's posts: hehehehe... phallic nose.

Having read both sides, and seen the cake, I'm going to say that the ninja star cake was unfortunate judgment on both sides.

Obviously the jewish decorator did not intentional or maliciously sneak swastikas onto the cake. Obviously the bride did not intend her fun ninja star cake to have an offensive symbol on it.

The mother in this case probably needs to take a deep breath and calm down. The bakery gave them a refund, apologized... why the need to smear someones business over a miss communication and poor judgment?

October 16, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

sweet heavens... I looked at this post 3 times before I realised there was anything sinister about those cakes!! i just thought they were a bit rubbish.

does this mean I'm too sweet and innocent to notice?

October 16, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKaty

Censorship sucks. Oh well. Back to the uncensored web, where net nannies don't get all flustered.

October 16, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I think I almost spit out my drink when I scrolled to the turkey cake...holy moly!

October 16, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKatie

Actually, it's not censorship. Censorship is generally done by an authority figure onto someone else. I suppose you could say they self-censored, but more accurately what they did was self-edited.

Censorship is bad indeed because it is someone telling someone else what they can say. It is a limitation.

Editing is a series of professional choices designed to put out the best product possible.

Cake Wrecks edited, they did not censor. They made an educated, weighed, and professional decision based on the situation at hand. That is a very good thing and something more blogs should consider doing more often.

October 16, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKimberly Chapman

Thanks Kimberly,

I honestly didn't get the connection between taking down yesterday's post and censorship. I thought he was talking about the disclaimer above the comment section.

Ah well. Thanks again.

john

October 16, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterjohn (the hubby of Jen)

No wonder Frankie's sad--just consider where his nose ended up.

October 16, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMelindaB65

"... anyone who writes hate mail to a baker over something like this needs to watch the news for more deserving targets."

I like this comment.
I'm tempted to suggest some more deserving targets, but since this isn't a politics blog, I won't.

October 16, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterGary

I think it's perfectly fine that the post was taken down.

The cake was badly decorated and the baker made a really bad decision. But, if she is Jewish herself, for her to get racist responses it's quite disgusting. It was a stupid mistake (from both parties) and that was that. Didn't need to take it any further.

As for this post.. I literally LOL when the reindeer(?) popped up.

October 16, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAli A

You sure could leave the crude comments UN-POSTED. There's enough garbage on the Internet already, why add to it?

October 16, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSandee

LOVE LOVE LOVE these phallic cakes. To me, they are among the most hilarious. Ya know, it's part of life that people have bodies, instinctive urges, desires, and best of all, a powerful unconscious component guaranteed to bring this stuff out now and then.

Thumbs up to your healthy approach and ability to acknowledge and appreciate the humor in being human. :-D Yall are the greatest (Jen & John) and these cakes are among the most hilarious. Ginger

October 16, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Thank goodness my son is still alittle naive he thought frank was the hulk, and all he saw were cupcakes!! I on the other hand say way too much!! LOL

October 16, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterGo Kart mom/fan

The previous day's post surprised me - I saw that it had been taken down, which was disappointing, but didn't see that there was an explanation here until today. Anyway, it's not the post that surprised me, it's the reaction. I thought it looked pretty clear that the baker had just put various shapes on the cake that looked vaguely star-ish, and one just happened to be the same as a symbol of a very bad group of people. It's kind of like Frank's nose in this post - it wasn't intended to look like a particular thing, but it did. And it's funny for that.

As for the hate mail, that just sickened me. We live in a culture of offense - which means that if someone decides they're offended by something, our society informs them that they're absolutely right and should act on that immediately. Don't bother checking out the facts. If you were offended, you must be right. The other person must have deliberately offended you. So you have every right to extract whatever vengeance you so desire. A mistake on a cake is totally worth hate mail. Send death threats, too. That way they'll know that your way of seeing the world is the only right way. Ever.

Seriously. How immature do people get???

October 16, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I think I peed a little. I'm typing this from the floor. Oh my hell, those are hilarious.

October 16, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterNikki_in_Cali

I actually think that as far as ccc's go...that turkey was good! But oh, poor anxiety ridden franstein...widdle monster needs zanax!

October 16, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterpeewee

That looks like "The Passion of the Frankenstein."

October 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAmber

I actually like the turkey one. It's pretty darn cute!

October 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterPandora

Those are greatly gross and weird! I love this site (my friend sent it to me via facebook). I try my best when making a cake to "see" it in my head BEFORE I make the cake!

October 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLoriAnn

The green Frankenstein looks like something from an English show called The Mighty Boosh.
There's a character called Old Greg that looks like that green monster.
http://www.metacafe.com/watch/530183/old_greg/

October 20, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

the one thing no one said is that regardless of the symbols, the ninja cake looked horrible and the design in no way resembled lace of any kind... whoever decorated it didn't know what lace is

October 21, 2009 | Unregistered Commentermiss leigh

Lovely, because family-time cakes made for Thanksgiving and Christmas are meant to have strange-looking male append--

You know what? That's just wrong...

It's so effing hilarious, though. xDDD

October 29, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTeh Notebook Ghurl

I think people aren't getting laid enough and it's on their mind too much while their working

October 30, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBre

I hate to start mass panic.... but I beleive the uh turkey (slap) is *dum dum duhm!* a cupcake cake

October 31, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

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