My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Hello, Kitty?

Hello Kitty is the epitome of all things cute, to an almost nauseating degree:

However, put her in the hands of these bakers and she becomes a puff-faced gerbil with a glandular problem:

This next one is deceptively nice, other than the RSS-icon hair bow...

...but then you realize that massive domed face is ALL icing, slathered onto a...a....[swallowing] CUPCAKE CAKE!! [blood-curdling scream]

I think this next baker tried to make a Hello Kitty vampire, but since HK has no mouth it turned out a little...odd.

Transplanted walrus tusks, or dangling fingers? I suppose either works on the cracked black background. Oh, and maybe this is just me, but I find that a vampire who waves totally loses all "cool" credibility. Seriously. Can you picture Dracula waving? Of course not. It's just not dignified.

Now, if you want a creepy Hello Kitty done right, you do what Bonefinder did:

Zombie Hello Kitty - excellent!

And lastly, Julie M. found out the hard way that her local bakery either has no idea who Hello Kitty is, or believes she is Porky Pig's sister:

Yes, that's really supposed to be Hello Kitty. Wow.

Hey Ayana W., Holly U., Kelly H., and Matthew Z., what do you get when you combine Hello Kitty & Darth Vader?

Answer: Something that horrifies every Star Wars fan in existence:

Everyone can relax; it's Photoshopped. For legitimate HK insanity, though, check out Hello Kitty Hell. It's funny stuff, although I'd be lying if I said I didn't think a lot of the stuff on there is adorable. (Look at these water bottles and tell me they're not just the cutest - go on.)

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Reader Comments (121)

Hello Vader is not a 'shop job, it's real. He's made appearances at various comic and anime cons. His costume is one of the more normal ones out there 0_o (whatever you do, do NOT google "Man-Faye" or you WILL regret it!)

I'm a grown woman and I adore Hello Kitty! I grew up collecting Sanrio stuff and still like it, though I no longer buy every HK item I see. She's cute and happy! How can you not love her?

Well, ok, I guess there's some Wrecktators out there who don't, judging by the photos *LOL*

July 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDawnspring

Zombie kitty looks cool! Wonder if it was made for a boy who ripped the heads off his sisters Hello kitty dolls. :-)

July 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

You have to check out Bakerella's cute Hello Kitty Cake Pops.

July 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Oh, no...horrible except for the vampire one which is actually pretty good ( but creepy )

July 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLynn

I didn't read through all the comments so maybe this has been said, but the zombie cake is Debbiedoescake.

July 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAlana

the zombie hello kitty is EXCELLENT!

July 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDangGina

I LOOOOOOVE the Zombie Kitty cake....but the rest are just HORRIBLE!

July 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAelwyn

The Hello Kitty Vader is real! not photoshopped but really real. x

July 22, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterPeter

Vampire Hello Kitty obviously caught the Cancer Rat.

July 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDANA

My 10 year old son said of the first cake, "it looks like Hello Kitty went through a paper shredder and they tried to put her back together. It didn't work very well."
I have been laughing until tears are streaming down my face this morning. Thank you.

July 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJill

I can't believe they would do that to Hello Kitty.

July 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterApril

Wow. Hello Pet Cemetery Kitty!! The cake that bites back. Awesome!

July 23, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterblueyeddaizy

That last picture isn't photoshopped xD;


July 28, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I love Hello Kitty. Its so adorable and sweet. Its my favourite Japanese toy. That reminds me... must find and buy a Hello Kitty bentou (Japanese lunch) box for when I don't want to bother eating Japanese food on a plate nor in a bowl...

My word verification was "bressers". This is what Brothers call their clothing chests, since they do not wear dresses.

July 30, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSr. Mina, BSP

This was awesome!

I've seen such horrors at WalMart recently.

The last cake looks like a pig of some sort.

July 31, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterThe Blogstress

The Darth Vader isn't photoshopped. I saw him at the San Diego ComicCon in 2007.

August 4, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterGabriel

that zombie kitty is mine Debbie does cakes, that's just a shot taken at the customers house..... not sure who BONEFINDER is but that's MY cake

August 18, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterdebbie does cakes

I don't know...When I saw vampire kittie, I found myself thinking "spider mandibles". I mean, really! Don't tell me no one else did!

December 31, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSophie

HAHA! Love this post! This is the best blog ever!

January 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterC

Wow..hello kitty,u r really so cute da

June 13, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMinah

The first thing that came to mind when I saw the vampire Hello Kitty was "Hello Walrus." I guess Paul wasn't the walrus after all (goo-goo-ga-choo). (look up Beatles "Magical Mystery Tour" if you don't get it).

April 26, 2017 | Unregistered CommenterErin T. Aardvark

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