Friday
Mar122010
Et Tu, O-Town?
March 12, 2010 I feel I should prepare you in some way for today's Wreck.
Hm. Let's see...
Oh! I know. How about this:
Think of a place. A happy place.
A place where chocolate-dipped demon mummies can never, ever reach you - much less wrap you in their fudgy arms and squeeze the life-breath out of you.
Are you imagining that happy place? Are you there?
Ok, good.
You may now proceed.
AAAAAAUUUUGGGHHH!! THINK OF THE HAPPY PLACE!
THINK OF THE HAPPY PLACE!!!
Ahem.
Yes, it IS cake.
Forty six pounds of cake, to be precise, and fifty five pounds of chocolate ganache. It's a testament to the baker's skill that I could never get within arm's reach of this thing, for fear of it suddenly coming to life like in Night at the Museum.
Still, you've got to appreciate the humor of where they chose to start cutting:
"Hey, girl, you have one sweet piece of...[noticing onlookers]...uh...shoulder blade."Thanks to Wreckporter Jessica Y., who featured it here in her article for Orlando Weekly, and also to Paul J., the baker/sculptor, who's been an awfully good sport about all this.
In fact, you can check out progress shots of Paul sculpting the demon mummy (warning: a live model was used, & she's nekkid!) at his FB album here.
Reader Comments (187)
The comments are something else on the original blog. They are being pretty damn defensive of the artist and the piece and are condemming the blogger who directed this to Jen's attention.
It's the second photo that creeped me out the most. I could appreciate the skill required to make the cake but once people started cutting into it, I got kind of grossed out.
When I saw this I was instantly reminded of the Legend of Zelda games. This cake looks like one of the monsters that sits in town square on Ocarina of Time after you've pulled the sword out of the stone in the Temple. I *hated* those things! They always freaked me out when they would suddenly jump on your head and try to choke you.
I love how the article specifically says you wouldn't post it.
Way to stick it to the man.
I used to BE an artist's model, for drawing, for painting, and for scuplting out of clay. But CAKE? that's something different.
meanwhile, Sirius, your son would probably want the cake for the "cool freaky" factor, but considering this was sculpted live with a nude model--you'd better watch out! ;)
okay, it's a terrifying cake, but you have to admire the effort.
I'm apparently really, really in the minority, but I'm really blown away by the talent of the creator, and not creeped out at all. Ingenious how he's hidden the armatures so well.
And thanks, Anonymous at 10:36 -- I thought of Degas' ballerinas, too. He says in his comments that he wants to try the next cake using a bronze-tinted final coating...that would complete the illusion!
okay, it's a terrifying cake, but we must applaud the effort.
Does that count as performance art?
(3 days!!)
I´m glad I´m not the only one who thought of Pompeii, and that was one incredibly disturbing line of thought.
However, looking at it from a, um, distanced perspective, I can admire it as an abstract piece of art. As long as nobody mentions volcanoes. Or mummies. Or zombies.
Hm. While I appreciate the technical skill that must have gone into sculpting a cake like that, and it would look awesome done in metal, and I think it's kind of a cool idea, that first shot is probably the least flattering thing I've ever seen. Ick.
Props to the artist, that is, um, interesting work. I'd like to see what else he's done. As long as I'm not eating at the time.
And tonight on Cake Boss, an homage to House of Wax --
It's a shame all the comments on the blog are so rude towards the author.
It *is* a technical achievement, and it *does* look like a woman...but WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO EAT THAT AUGH D:
What is WRONG with these people?!?!?!?
First, I must say that I don't see anything creepy about that cake. Maybe I'm not normal.
I see a very good sculpture of an human being, althugh the chocolat was not the best option. The person who made this could have tried to gove some color to the cake, couldn't he? XD
But, yes, in some way, it reminds me some person found in the ruins of Pompeia.
That is amazing! It is so lifelike it would scare me to death!!
....not something you see every day. 0_o
This is a perfect example of what should be called "The Baker's Caveat"--Just because you CAN doesn't mean you SHOULD.
I've never seen a cake that was both a remarkable technical achievement, and a living nightmare.
The sad thing is it all comes down to color choice. Had they used white ganache It would have looked like a classic Renaissance statue and less like the charred body of a burn victim.
Just unbelievably amazing! I'm truly in awe over this. It is and it isn't, ya know?
All I can say is that model must have killer quads and feel REALLY comfortable with herself to pose like that nekkid for what was probably an extended period of tim in front of a crowd.
Is it weird that what bothers me the most is the pose? If this had actually copied the Degas bronze ballerina statue - which it sort of resembles - or a similar pose, I think I'd have been less creeped out and more blown away by the skill involved.
I thought of the ballerinas, too. Except that in the first shot, one of the knife/spatula strokes totally looks like mummy bandages. It's really quite impressive, but in a creepy, "What is that supposed to BE?!" way.
I think it's pretty cool actually.
I amazed at two things...how the creator was able to keep this cake from falling apart with little support...AND...the braveness of the model!
Uh, no no no! That looks like someone stole it from a morgue. If I was that model, I'd be having nightmares!
This thing looks like how we feel on a bad day when we have cramps.
She looks like a burn victim. This is seriously disturbing. Yes, accomplished cakemaking. Also...eww.
Thank you for trying to prepare us for this cake but I just don't think anything could.
Very comical..they should've done red cake on the inside...kind of looks like someone who was stuck inside a port a potty when it rolled down a hill..this is the end result...nasty!!!
I don't get it. Why is this a wreck? That's a beautiful piece of art there. Looks like cast bronze. Gorgeously sculpted. It seems like that was the idea too, not like they wanted a cute marzipan bride and got this instead. Show some love for that sculptor's skills.
Glad that I'm not the only one who thought it looked like she was spending some quality time on the throne...
The fact that it actually has FINGERS scares the heck out of me. It would be so less creepy if the chocolate was smooth...something about the texture makes it seems much more disturbing.
On a side note, if you are going to have a realistic cake of ANY type (but especially human)do not start with eating the a$$ first!
WV Buleh...the sound the cake makes as it come to life, "Bulehhhhhhh"
Pass the a$$(cake),please.....
Mmmm....Earthy!
That is an incredible piece of work, especially if it was created in situ in front of an audience. Yes, it is creepy but only because it is so lifelike - it could get up and get you at any minute!
Taking a deep breath, thinking of happy place.
Did I mention I visit here everyday, just before I eat lunch?
Did I mention that i teach junior high?
Thinking of happy place
This cake seriously freaks me out. I have tears in my eyes! And I'm 28 years old! Off to go look at some cute bunnies or something.
Before reading the description, I thought - wow, that's a crazy world history class to have a cake that looks like one of the castings of victims of Vesuvius in Pomeii... so strange.
Y'know, I could this cake working quite nicely at the opening of a mummy exhibition. Archeologists and museum staff tend to have that kind of humour.
It looks like one of the figures you can see at the Pompeii museum. Yikes!
This looks like it should be celebrating the Bodyworks traveling museum exhibit. It's a great example of a skinned body. (shivers)
wv: DIAPACEN. I would diapacen to get out and away from this!
I feel like if he had icing that could have been poured over the cake instead of spread this could have been quite beautiful. Its the awful icing job that really makes this look like the flesh is sloughing off... AAAUUUUGGGGHHHH!!
I just wish he'd gone with ANYTHING but chocolate ganache, which makes it look like a bog body. An amazingly sculpted bog body. Maybe it looks less terrifying in person?
Am I the only one getting a Hieronymus Bosch vibe from this horror?
WV: sabing. I am on the verge of sabing my eyes out rather than look at this horrific wreck.
Yes it is creepy but am I the only one who doesn't understand the title of the post?
I see I'm not the first person to think of the Pompeii victims. Scrolling down the page, I was half expecting to see various other figures frozen in their ashy death throes. Yum! ...so what'll the theme be for the *next* banquet, wreckerators; drowning victims? Earthquake victims? (Topical!) Ugh. I don't wanna think about this any more.
wv: repar. You cannot repar the damage done to my psyche.
You're trying to stun us all into silence aren't you. :) I did think Rodin, then I saw the second picture & thought, Descendants of the Donner party reunion, nice to see they have a sense of humour about their ancestors. Why are they cutting up the people of Pompeii? A lure for Wendigos?
My happy place just went "poof" like a pin pricked bubble, the second picture was so disturbing, like some cannibal feast. It reminded me of that scene in the movie Alive, where they were trying to decide from who & what part of the people they could take the meat, interestingly they chose the same part. If it was a Hannibal Lecter party, that would be different, freakish, but different.
How did they balance all that weight like that? The impressiveness does not override the creepy factor it has going. One man's art is another man's nightmare.
What is it with the cakes like people they cut into & eat, it's just really disturbing. Yes I know it's supposed to be like a sculpture. Maybe if it was more bronze tinted or something that wasn't someone's skin colour.
I haven't even gotten to the position they chose, wow.
@Ashley B. Red velvet cake! ROFLMAO!
Does anyone else think this looks like a burn victim? Is there a reason they didn't use fondant??
Of all the cake wrecks I've seen, this one is enough to give me nightmares.
Looks like one of the Redead from Zelda
...........
Just. Wow. I really did get scared/disturbed there for a second.
Props to the baker/decorator for pulling it off but .... why????!
Uuummmm, all I got is "WHY????"