My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Saint Patrick Would Be SHOCKED

Shocked, I say!

I mean, as I understand it ol' Patrick was a pretty conservative guy. So I'm going to go out on a limb here and guess that the whole "Kiss me, I'm Irish" thing was not his idea.

Apparently they needed all of the capital "I"s for "IRISH."
(And as we all know, the Irish hate apostrophes.)

Still, someone needs to tell these cookie cakes to stop giving us lip. Mostly because their lips are deeply, deeply disturbing:

First tell me what "Irist" means, and then we'll discuss which display of affection I'm comfortable giving you. Mmkay?

Given all the suggestive suggestions being suggested, you might think Wreckerators would be more mindful of their capital "L"s, too:

Granted, that yellow magnet does "suck," but blaming it on the Irish is a pretty polarizing move.

Let's end on a more positive note, though. After all, it is Saint Patrick's Day, and I'm sure he would appreciate a more appropriate expression of celebration.

Aw, that's doing Ireland proud, right there.

Btw, when did Peppermint Patties get canonized? (Not that I'm complaining, mind you; they are quite heavenly.)

Ok, forget appropriate expressions of celebration. Let's go out with one final insult to dear St. Pat:

[brightly] Today's word, boys and girls, is "prat." Puh-rat. Prat.

It has some really fun meanings, too, kids. Why don't you go look it up in the dictionary with your parents?

Terri J., Margaret C., Madeline, Chris H., Cathy W.,& Ruth S., since no one else is gonna say it, I guess I will: Happy St. Patricia's Day!

- Related Wreckage: Funny

Update: Apparently, St. Patrick was actually Welsh. Or was it English? Ohhh... and then he was kidnapped by Irish pirates. But he later returned to England to marry Buttercup after many madcap adventures with a giant, a Spaniard and an angry little man with a lisp. Everybody clear? Good, good...

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Reader Comments (128)

Er, trek, have you been in Dublin for St. Paddy's recently? Today the gangs of drunk 13 year olds were roaming before the parade started at noon, and middle-aged men were vomiting outside the pubs by mid-afternoon. So it's definitely a day of drunken debauchery for some people. But a nice family day out for others, and a celebration of Irishness for others, and still a holy day of obligation for others!

And oh, so funny that someone had word verification of synge as in JM Synge, Irish playwright, of Playboy of the Western World, which caused riots when it opened at the Abbey Theatre in Dublin in 1907!

Is it just me, or have the comments on the Paddy's day cakes been even funnier than usual? (Not including mine.) Jen of course is spot on as always. Thanks for all the good laughs Jen!

March 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

St. Pratrick's day...

March 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Those were great! Thanks for the smiles!

March 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterQuack and Quill

Maybe the Luck of the Irist is what one has on St. Pratrick's day... Or maybe my meds need adjusting again...

March 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBADKarma!

I'm Australian, so forgive me if this is a stupid question, but we don't have these here so I will ask anyway...what the hell is a cookie cake??? I keep seeing cake wrecks here that claim to be cookie cakes... so what are they? Is it just an oversized cookie (ie flat) or is it the same size as a cake but made to look / taste like a cookie? Again, sorry for the stupid question, but it has been bugging me for weeks!

March 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

To the last Anonymous...a cookie cake is just what you thought it is...a big cookie with decorations. And if it's on this site, wreckorations.

March 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Hmm either I have a dirty mind or that cake doesn't say Luck of the Irish.. that capital L looks different to me lol. The first cake.. makes me wonder who would buy it and would they think they would actually get lucky? Hm many weird cakes this lovely day.

March 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

I just wuv, twuly wuv, this site.

March 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterButtercup Bento

Don't forget the bit where St Pat became the Dwead Piwate Woberts. Oh and how he drove the R.O.U.Ses out of Ireland after dealing with the snakes. No more monkey-fighting R.O.U.Ses in Monday to Friday Ireland.

And I really pity those poor little leprechauns on the top cake that are about to get ingested by an amoeba.

March 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterWolvie Girl

HA! These cakes are inconceivable!
"I do not think that word means what you think it means."

It's amazing to me that after all this time people still feel like correcting someone smart enough to know it's not called "epcot".

STOP CORRECTING HER, PEOPLE! You only make yourselves look sillier and Jen look smarter.

Makes sense since prat can also mean a$$.

March 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Great post! As an Irish girl, I'm loving the American (mostly?) take on Paddy's day as demonstrated through that most expressive of media, cake. One of which is "Patty's Day" ha! Patty is a girl's name^_^ Can we instead celebrate the cultural icon that is Patty Bouvier on March 17th? Maybe people can go around painted yellow&wearing purple wigs?

March 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

A surprisingly accurate video clip on St. Patrick's Day from Veggie Tales

March 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKatie

Love the Princess Bride reference; made me LOL.

March 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLori

I was pretty sure that was a bird...And then after seeing the second "kiss me" cake, I realized it was supposed to be lips.
My bad.

March 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa

When your point of reference for Irish symbols is a box of Lucky Charms, that giant U on the suck of the irish cake makes complete sense. It looks just like the little yellow horseshoe marshmallows.

Wreck on everyone, wreck on!

March 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterYota Armai

ROTFL! Love the segue in the
Princess Bride. Brilliant.

March 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJenn McKinlay

I'm surprised you saw a yellow magnet (and horseshoe didn't cross my mind for SEVERAL minutes). I saw a toilet seat. Yup.

March 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterNaazju

heh heh heh ....

Granted, that yellow magnet does "suck," but blaming it on the Irish is a pretty polarizing move.

polarizing? magnetism? heh heh heh! science joke :P

March 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterPolexia

You know, I don't think that one cookie actually says "Irist", judging from the shape of the letters, I think it might actually be "Inuit".

March 18, 2010 | Unregistered Commentersjvan0

The third cake from top seems to say 'Kiss me, I'm Inuit'. I could be wrong though...


March 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

That cake actually does say "Luck of the Irish" in perfectly acceptable cursive, at least it looks like it to me.
The bottom of the letter has the little loop of a capital cursive L, the capital cursive S just has a curve. I'll admit that they can look similar, but that would only mean that I'm more likely to assume it's an L in this case.

March 19, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I'm looking over a 6-leaf clover, that I overlooked before...

March 19, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Those lips look bikini bottoms

March 21, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I think that "Irist" one might say Inuit? That's what I thought it said when I first looked at it.

March 21, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterChocolatier

Aaaarghh.... I hate it when poeple refer to St Patrick as St Patty!!!
And he was niether Welsh nor English but came from the part of Britain which would later be called Wales. And he was my third auntie twice removed.

March 22, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCake Woman

the Princess Bride joke was classic

March 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

YAY! I'm an official 14 year old geek to have read AND seen The Princess Bride. As you wish, wrecktastic overlord.

July 25, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSabrina

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