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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Friday
Apr162010

Getting a Bad Vibe Here...

Attn Parents: This post is not appropriate for young children. Or adults, really, but I won't tell if you won't.

Since I know you're curious about the behind-the-scenes workings here at Cake Wrecks, I thought I'd provide you with the actual dialogue between me and John while discussing a cake.

This cake:

Ready? Here goes.

Me: [calling to other room] "Hey, you don't know any vibrator puns, do you?"

John: [crossing the distance in approximately .7 seconds] "What are you working on?"

Me: "Oh, it's this one. I've got the 'bad vibe' thing going for the title, but now I'm at a loss. What else do you call these things? Do you know any euphemisms?"

John: [staring] "What's it supposed to be?"

Me: "Beats me. It just looks like a giant pink finger."

[both of us pause]

Me: "Hey, I bet that's one."

John: [unable to speak due to laughter]

John: [getting his breath back] "You HAVE to write this down."

Annnnd that's about it. By the way, I feel this is an excellent time to mention that, yes indeedy, we actually get paid now to do this. Living' the dream, people. We're livin' the dream.

Oh, and neither Lis B. nor I have any idea what that cake is supposed to be. However, since it was in the "kids cakes" gallery on the bakery's website I'm guessing it's probably some perfectly innocent character from a cartoon or something. No doubt many of you are preparing to point this out in the comments, too, so that the rest of us look like pervy malcontents. So, you know, I've got that to look forward to.

Livin' the dream, man. Livin'. The. Dream.

- Related Wreckage: Funny Business

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Reader Comments (344)

I am laughing too hard :D

Jaime said...
It looks like a cheapo vibrator that would come as the prize in a box of Cracker Jacks....if there were adult versions of Cracker Jacks, that is...lol ;)
~Jaime

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterOnTheSceneTV

Huh. And I thought it was a pantyliner.....without the wings of course. Maybe its a first period cake? Birds and Bees? Eeeerrr...butterflies? Oh, thats where the wings are!

Kira B.

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGlamMacGyver

i think its ment 2 b number 1 from numberjacks

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterFreya

Does it have a pink cross or minus sign at one end? It looks an awful lot like a pregnancy test to me.

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda

Maxi pad, pregnancy test, tongue depressor, take your pick. but why it has a female face and is in a garden of flowers is beyond me. feminine issues, I presume.

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Duhh... its a dancing tampon.
Can't you TELL?
Every 11 year old girl wants one at her birthday party. Look how HAPPY she is. Have a happy period!

LOL..pervy malcontents. Y'all are funny

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMe!

Well, perhaps this reveals my macabre sense of humor... but I thought it was a pastel casket, at first. It does look like it's about to be lowered into the ground - as it should be.

I mean, really, someone bury this thing, quick.

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGabby

Looks like the cap end of a pregnancy pee-stick to me.

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered Commentertrek

I think it's a cake given to a new gardener - meant to be representative of that phrase "green thumb" (hints the flowers and such)... aka. i think it's a thumb, but they didnt want to actually make it green because they were afraid you wouldnt know what the cake was supposed to be.

...

that's a joke. get it? because clearly, we dont know what it is regardless of the color!

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa

If it's a Numberjacks 1, then I have to say, they did a better job than this one:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/bruceandjackie/4263384026/

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRememberMe

I got all shook up when I saw this thing. . . It seems to have crated quite a buzz!

(You wanted vibrator puns, right?!?)

As for the BOB reference: I used to work in a department where our boss' boss was Bob. It was so challenging to work for him he became a verb, as in: You're going to a co-worker's desk, and they're just getting off the phone with Bob. You ask if she can go to lunch. She replies, "No, I can't go to lunch today. I just got Bobbed and now I'm swamped."

This gives a whole new meaning to the term "I've just been Bobbed."

Thanks for the laughs!

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTLC

I was completely innoccent and thought it was a female version of Thumb Man... :S

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSarah F

i think its a numberjack - tho the colour isn't quite right.

http://www.numberjacks.co.uk/adults/content/view/108/61/

was it from a British site - as im British and guessed pretty much straight away !

lots of funny comments tho !

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

My 5 year old says it's a corn dog. I asked why and he said because of the shape. Then I asked him about the color and he said maybe it's part of a butterfly. That clears it up right?

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

WV: wainati--what your mind becomes when you look at too many of these perversions of cakes

WV: confl--I'm so confl, I just can't figure it out!

WV: actrali--I hope it isn't actrali supposed to be what everyone thinks it is...

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Now here's a thought.... If one *were* to actually order a cake for the purpose of "the talk", how badly do you think the bakery would mess that one up?

"umm what's this? It's supposed to look like a friendly maxi pad...."

"It doesn't look like that at all..."

LOL

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMichelle

This seems like either a tampon or what my students call a BOB--Battery Operated Boyfriend. Either way it;s just odd.

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Tampon?

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterPamela

Ooo, maybe it's the mutant baby from the science fiction classic, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/That_Only_a_Mother" rel="nofollow">"That Only a Mother"!...and as such, a poignant reminder of the dangers of radiation.
wv: eaton
Or maybe its arms and legs have simply already been eaton.

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRachel M.

OMG! WOLVIE GIRL's comment..."pinkbob NoPants...HAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHHA!!"

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterpeewee

Is it Prince Charles?

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterlabibliotecaria

I'm throwing my vote behind the number "1" from Numberjacks. A creepy, Stepfordy, dragqueen version of that character, but there is enough resemblance in the face for my vote. Rather popular for cakes, but usually in a recognizable version.

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTerri

I think it looks like a show here in the uk called the numberjacks. Its a show about numbers saving the day. Thats what i think.

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered Commentercrashandburn22501

I think it might be a character from a uk show called the "NUMBERJACKS". Its a show about numbers saving the day. It could be no. 1

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered Commentercrashandburn22501

It's a worm

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterNicky

Karate Mom's idea was the most awesome! :) Since I have two girls; I'll have to remember that. First I have to get through the potty training stage...

"Well, I, for one, think that it's the perfect cake to accompany "The Talk" with your 10 to 13 year old daughter because it looks like a fancifully decorated maxi pad.
"Honey, we need to talk. But first, have some cake. You're going to be a woman soon, and...."

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAlysa

a poorly shaped humpty dumpty? or an extremely smooth tampon.

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBec

My vibrator Pun:

It's a Dil - Doh!

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCasey Becher

My friends call them BOBs = battery operated boyfriends.

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJen

Using it for "the talk" might not be so far-fetched--my school used to show the girls a film in which a mom explains things by making a pancake shaped like a uterus with fallopian tubes! Thanks for the memory.

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Definitally a tampon applicator. lol

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I dunno... To me it just looks like a huge, happy tampon...

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBADKarma!

You know, if you add a string to the bottom of it, it looks like not a maxi but something other that is used for the same pupose. Try giving a piece of this cake to your male relative..here honey, have a piece of tampon cake. Bet that gets them excited.

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

teeheehee
there's no cartoon character that looks like that.

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAdrienne

I wanted to say dil-dough so bad that I didn't have time to read the rest of the comments.

Dil-dough, dil-dough, dil-dough.

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterkelley

Wolvie Girl said: There used to be a cartoon character called Pinky but he was a mouse. Maybe this is Spongebob's somewhat disturbed sea cucumber friend, Pinkbob Nopants.

I agree that it's a Bob.

Battery
Operated
Buddy

Or the tongue B.O.B., we saw at a "toy" party once.

wv: unimate...yup...that's what it is...like a unicycle...one and you.*LOL*

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterHyena Overlord

It is Thomas the Tank Engine's distant cousin, Tillie the Tombstone. Notice the family resemblance? Notice that she is pushing up daisies? No? I got nothing.

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTricia L

Yeah....I'd have to say it's either that Numberjack thing or some sort of sanitary napkin/tampon. At first glance I thought, "A happy Maxi-pad?"

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSuzanne Dargie

I feel old.
Its obviously a pink trimline phone.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trimline_telephone

Here is a pink one for sale on Etsy (Not mine, no affiliation.)

http://www.etsy.com/listing/40541573/vintage-pink-trimline-phone

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterEAnglin

If you look very closely you can just make out the lettering at the bottom:
Congratulations on your proctology degree!

-PKM

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

It's the "Have a Happy Period Cake."

Because sometimes, when you're dealing with that crap for a week, you need a slice of cake.

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBree

Honestly?? My first thought was as Adipose, but it's not quite short enough or round enough, but it is what I thought.

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJaemi

What a lovely color for a vibrat.. I mean cake. With pretty butterflies and flowers to go with it. Now if only the wreckerator gave a hint of what that thing is.. I wouldn't let any kid near that thing since it could be a demented finger disguised as a friendly.. whatever it is.. lol.

April 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

It's totally a pantyliner with a face.

Everyone's comments have me laughing till I cry!

April 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterShinyGreenApple

I'm pretty sure it is for a first birthday. I've seen similar napkins with plaid, daisies and butterflies. Sure is weird looking though!!

April 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

http://www.pixiedustcakes.co.uk/numberjacks_detail_1.jpg

I think numberjack is a good option, Number 1 is also purple on this cake.

Oh look. It's Margaret's birthday cake. (re: Are You There God? it's Me Margaret.)

April 17, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterbeautifamous

On another note, I do want to take red frosting and scribble:

"Have a Happy Period!"

April 17, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterbeautifamous

This is funny. It is. I am just pissed I missed the turd cake game yesterday. You mentioned Estonia and I was like, dude, I live in an Armenian village! And then I couldn't get my internet to work to enter. But you should know that someone in a tiny village in armenia is reading this regularly, laughing, and sharing it with my armenian friends.

April 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBrent

When I saw this, the first thing that came to mind was "vibrator!" But I have a "feeling" that's not what it is.

It could be a tampon...

April 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterYuurei Sakka

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