My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

A Picture is Worth What Now?

I know, I know, sometimes you're in a hurry, and you have to grab just any ol' cake off the shelf for your party.


Why this one?

If you're fishing for a compliment, then that's strike one.


And if you bring this home to celebrate your sixth anniversary?

Well, let's just say there are other fish in the sea. Who can spell.


Wow, I'm so glad they remembered the glass slipper on Dad's cake!

The pink purse alone was just a little too cliché, you know?


It's not always a case of last-minute cake decisions, though; sometimes people choose this stuff intentionally.

And you thought dinosaurs were agnostic.


This cake was part of a Breast Cancer Awareness display:

Is that Coraline's creepy button-eyed Other Mother?

We can only hope.


Speaking of cakes that will blow your mind, how about a dust mite encouraging you to have healthy digestive regularity?

And darned if I just don't want to disappoint the little fella, too.


Thanks to Wreckporters Kati, Theresa G., Mark R., Danielle N., Anony M., & Kaitlin.

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Reader Comments (75)

I think you meant "cliched."

November 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJaney

OMG!! The dust mite one looks so happy!!!
"Hi, I'm Dusty, the Dust Mite! And I'm happy to tell you to GO, GO, GOOOOOO!"
Why would a little dust mite be so interested in toilet habits?
part of me dosen't want to know.

November 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterXion

the guy the first cake was for had friends who would greet him in the bowling alley parking lot shouting "great bowling tonight" like a cheer to get him in the right frame of mind. he would call back "okoi!" due to his slight speech impediment.

the kids the second cake was for were always stuck in junior varsity as they were just small fries. it was supposed to say Happy 6th year Anti-Varsity."

the "Happy Bday Dad" was for his last "boy day" before the surgery wherein he became Mom.

Hey, Zeus loves everyone- even a TWrecks who's lost his Princess wrangler.

Sadie always regretted her facial tattoo and wished she'd had less tequila & shame so she'd remember who Hope was anyway.

I never watched it but there was a cartoon called Thundercats and that reminds me of a little character on there. If I were interested, I'd Bing it and call it by name. I'd heard they were making a new version so I'm sure this is a promotional tie-in. (Why can't we get updates on something cool like Jem or Marvin the Martian?)

November 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBarbara Anne

um...not exactly sure how plastic blow up dolls raise awareness about breast cancer? Maybe for the monthly self breast exam demos???

November 5, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMree

That dinosaur looks like a monster that crawled out of some pretty nasty tar lol. Wow whoever gets a bite of that creature will have a nasty, black toothed grin for awhile plus a sugar rush. I loved gel as a kid lol so I know it would be interesting to eat that. As for that last one it looks like a multi colored tribble lol.

November 5, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

#1 Commemorates the deservedly short-lived TV show, 'Bowling for Carp' -- canceled when the producers couldn't find a way for fish to hold the ball. Sponsor Pepperidge Farms was very disappointed.

#2 Aww...Kate and Austin have been going steady for six years! Bet they'll be the talk of the senior prom if they last through high school.

#3 Where are the extraneous quotes when you need them?

#4 Why last-minute Christmas shopping isn't always a good idea. ('Hey-Zeus' adds a whole other level of confusion.) Good catch, @nani.

#5 Those eyes do look very non-buttonish. Maybe the bakery was trying to work in some other causes as well.

#6 Reminds me of that Outer Limits episode, 'It Crawled Out Of The Woodwork'. No, I don't know what 'Go! Go! Go!' might have to do with it, unless it's a warning.

November 5, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

I can see the Happy Birthday Jesus cake really being a Christmas cake. Some Christian families DO have a Happy Birthday Jesus cake at Christmastime--it's a way of celebrating Christ's birth in a fun way with their kids. I can totally imagine someone ordering a Happy Birthday Jesus cake, asking their small children what should be on the cake, and going along with little Tommy's suggestion that Jesus might like a dinosaur cake.

Or maybe it's for a kid named Hay-SOOS whose favorite colors are red, green, and sludgy greenish-black.

November 5, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMorgan

I can see the 40th Birthday cake for Dad being bought by a very tired mother.
"What cake did you want to get for Daddy?"
"Princess Shoe!!"
"Wouldn't the fish pond be more..."

November 5, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterElisheba

In reference to the title of this post, I was explaining to my dad how I won one of the Carrot Jockey necklaces in Toronto and so I sent him a link to the Naked Mohawk Baby Carrot Jockey post to show him where it came from.

His reply back was priceless: "That pictures is worth at least five words."


November 5, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMonica

I think the T-Rex cake is missing some punctuation. It should have read:


November 5, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMegan

I think that last thing is a pom pom. Who knows?

November 5, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKennedy

@ Friend of Jesus and David

What throws me off is that it is in Christmas colors!

November 5, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKennedy

Catching up this morning. Gary FTW, he definitely said it best!

November 5, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAlison

I think, if I'm not mistaken, the "Happy Birthday Jesus" cake refers to this:

**Eddie Izzard -- language issues included

November 5, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterReverend Ref

So a little boy named Jesus likes dinosaurs? Cool. I've got a handful of friends named Jesus. I can't figure out the wreck part.

November 5, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCorie

@mebrr - that is absolute gold, made me snort! TRex across the water, ha!

November 5, 2011 | Unregistered Commentershaz

The bowling cake with the fish on it. Those look like koi, in which case during harvest time the fish are "bowled" (placed in large tubs) to photograph better for potential buyers. It's still an ugly cake. But not as illogical as it seems.

November 5, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterHetty

Reverend Ref... I bet you are right.

November 5, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKennedy

We do not have the time so don't be coy. You don't have to fish for a compliment because I've already said you're a great bowler. Stop now while we have time to spare or you'll have a strike against you.

I think that cake says it all. I work with a man who has bowled 28 perfect games and has earned a ring for each one. This cake is befitting the man who constantly tells you how great he is at whacking wooden pins with heavy balls. He can be all wet and one more demand for attentino may have him sleeping with the fishes.

But, I digress....

November 6, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBill C

My sister-in-law buys a 'Happy Birthday Jesus' cake every year at Christmas for her nieces and nephews. Really.

I agree that the calico tribble is actually supposed to be a cheering pom-pom (Go-Go-Go!), but I'm totally at a loss for an explanation for the Cinderella Dad cake .

And someone should totally make gummy koi.

November 6, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCookie

Hope died long ago.
We honor her with a
Life-like make-up job.

November 7, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

Wow. These are some of the best ones I think that I've seen yet. I love the 'happy birthday Jesus' and the 'hope' for breast cancer ones for sure!

November 7, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterHanna M

once went to the grocery store got a cake wanted happy valentines day written on itguess what i got happy valentins day! but i didnt take a picture

November 12, 2011 | Unregistered Commenteranonymous

I think it is some Raptor Jesus joke I don't get.

Also betting the last one might be a Packer cake lol

December 19, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDez

Haha that dad's cake reminds me of the one my 5 year old daughter wanted for my husband recently. She wanted one with purple and pink flowers, she settled for multi colored balloons and purple writing (already on it saying Happy Birthday). My husband said he was just glad it wasn't a princess cake! ;)

March 21, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAeonix

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