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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Monday
Apr042011

Blowing in the Wind

How many times must a baker be told,
"Don't pipe 'flowers' where flowers belong?"


And how many colors are spelled correctly,
While still managing to be wrong?


How many directions are misunderstood,
Like the first Wreck that received such renown?


And how many ways can you try to explain,
That "nothing"'s still something written down?

The answer, my friend, is blowing in the wind.

The answer is "italicized" like it's blowing in the wind!

Thanks to Anna B., Alexis, Erica, David H., & Rosej, with the thanks "fuzzy" like a warm hug. (Only not in a creepy way.)

« Move Over, Hallmark | Main | Sunday Sweets: Cake or Fake? »

Reader Comments (75)

I so love that you parodied an entire song just to get to that last cake!

@Becky 12:36 PM - No, sad to say, after working in a state office for almost 20 years and reviewing many, many written examples of "standard American English" as interpreted by native speakers...of standard American English (whatever that may be), I can attest that the problem stretches across the entire spectrum of those who use writing to communicate. Still, makes for much better Wrecks!

April 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMiss Mindy

My personal favorite has to be the worm cake that says "Nothing." After all, what is more of a waste of money then sprinkling Oreos and gummy worms then an addition of hot pink frosting that makes absolutely no sense.

Do wreckerators get paid by the letter? Is that why that put all of the unnecessary extra effort into piping all of the instructions on the cake as well as the original message?

April 4, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterdarlingbeatrice

IDIOTS!!

April 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The last one - such a pretty cake. Such a wreck of a sentiment...

April 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterStephenie Daily

Nobody likes me, everybody hates me, guess I'll go eat worms...and cake. With nothing on it.

April 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMelinda

Just last week, my co-worker piped instructions on a cake...I couldn't believe it!! I work with a Cake Wrecker!! :)
I think a lot of these mistakes are caused by the decorator being distracted while writing, overworked with lots of orders or doesn't read the order form thoroughly!

April 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCoco

Please, Please, Please have #1 sing this! This post made me so happy. Way to bring back these classic wrecketypes with a classic song.

April 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterTricia N.

I don't know why, but I love the last cake.

April 4, 2011 | Unregistered Commentertarichuck

The answer, my friend, is throw it in the bin...

April 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterNan

Ok, a dead frog on cake #1 and a colorblind wreckorator on the "pink" thing. Banner Monday.

April 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDonna

ARGGGHHHHHH!

Obviously most decorators can READ (though comprehension is questionable) so why can't someone come up with a simple order form that clearly breaks down the items?:
-INSCRIPTION
-INSCRIPTION NOTES (STYLE, CASE, COLOR, ETC.)
-DECORATION

April 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I do believe the "italicized" cake is one of my favorites!

wv: emblette: When the ingredients in your omlette sink below the surface and are embedded in the egg.

April 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterValerieC

Every time I see instructional cakes gone awry, I wonder if the human race is doomed...(in pink with flowers please!)

April 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDJ Twisted Sister

I'm with Courtney... these (at least some, if not most) have, have, HAVE to be on purpose. There simply is no other reason why there seems to be SO MANY of them. I'm not complaining, I'm just pguessing that, for grocery chain store cake decorators who don't give a damn because this wasn't their dream job, having their wreck make it onto the esteemed Cake Wrecks blog is some sort of trophy to them. Or maybe customers who specifically order cakes this way then send the pics in hoping their cake will make it on the blog. My brain refuses to accept the idea that there are actually THIS many idiots out there who do this without realizing it.

April 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterChantelle

Arghhh who would pay for these?? Lol if you know it isn't right just don't buy the thing. And that nothing cake.. really is nothing. I don't know why they can't figure out that you don't put directions on cakes. Guess they all like wrecking poor customers cakes.

April 5, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

Thank you for brightening my Monday - it's not just that you do this, it's that you do it so well! ;)

I hate to think that there are that many wreckers out there, but I have to admit - if I got one of those I'd buy it just so I could laugh at it and submit a photo to you!

April 5, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterhyphen8

Hey Jenn, I don't know if you saw it or heard about it, but on Rachael Ray, they briefly talked about CW, and that Rachael is a fan of it.

April 5, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterRachel

Do you suppose these are along the lines of "there is no such thing as bad publicity"? I suppose it conflicts with "the customer is always right," though that one seems to have gone out of favor lately.
Very funny wrecks today (well, yesterday, as I'm posting on Tuesday)!

April 5, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMuria

Hey, but Gilmore Girls sure saw this coming! "Green is the new pink"
:D

April 5, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLen

Oh, that blowing in the wind cake! The lettering is so dang beautiful! Beautiful, and oh so wrong.

April 6, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterGale

I think that even Dylan would have to laugh---certainly one of the funniest parodies of a great song!

April 6, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCarol

The sad thing is, the script on the last one is beautiful -as is the cake!

April 6, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterIsabella

This reminds me of my own cake wreck. I bought a cake for my sister's birthday. Her name is Monika-- note the less common spelling. I suppose it was my fault for not writing it down, but I got: "Happy Birthday Monica with a k!"

April 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

At least the cake decorators aren't SEO experts cake candy wreckage videos kittens...

PS Happy birthday Flowers! Whoever you are!

April 28, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSam

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