My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

A Total Dud

John and I spent all of last weekend working on the Halloween costumes we're going to wear to go trick-or-treating at Walt Disney World this Friday, because that's totally something thirty-something adults with no kids do.

Oh, I'm sorry; did I say "trick-or-treating? I meant "treak or treating."


It's a lot like trick-or-treating, only with more treaks.


We also bought a giant variety pack of Halloween candy to give out to the neighborhood kids next week, but John's already eaten everything except the little boxes of Milk Duds. We are literally going to be giving out Duds, you guys. We'll probably walk outside on November 1st to find our lawn littered with TP, Milk Dud boxes, and tiny molars.

I'm pretty sure caramel was invented by a lazy dentist who got tired of pulling teeth. Admit it: chewing caramel is like chewing a mouthful of Lilliputians armed with grappling hooks. (Really sweet Lilliputians, though. Some of which come with a chocolate coating. Mmm. Is this disturbing anyone else? No? Good.)


Hey, speaking of Lilliputians with grappling hooks... what the heck are these?

More importantly, does the idea of chewing gummi teeth squick anyone else out?

 And most importantly, isn't "squick" like the coolest made-up word ever?


This ghostly bowling ball has a boo boo. See if you can spot it.


 Now, I know what you're thinking, and I'm way ahead of you. So you just sit right there and relax, while Auntie Jen fetches just the thing you're looking for.

[sounds of construction]
[geese honking]
[slide rule]
[minor explosion]


 Er, you did want a pair of zombie muppet pumpkins, right?

 Dang, I'm good.


Hey, I just realized "Auntie Jen" sounds like "antigen" if you pronounce "aunt" the American, buggy way. Which is totally creppy.

It's kind of a cross between crappy and creepy.

Or maybe it's like a thin pancake. 


Either way, as the pirate mummy with a poor grasp of puns likes to say, 

"It's a wrap!"


Thanks to Heather S., Raevyn, Julie D., Brooke, Melios, Timothy C., & Lorinda R. for the spirited selections. 

« Subjective Reasoning | Main | Read 'Em And Weep »

Reader Comments (61)

Only on Cakewrecks would I find myself commenting on ghostly bowling balls, zombie muppet pumpkins, and unpunny pirate mummies. I'm not a lunatic if people actually know what I'm talking about.

October 24, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterteabunny

I reckon 'creppy' is the spider's comment on the quality of the purple web. As for the muppet pumpkins - that right hand one, with the blank eyes, is HORRIBLE. Yuk.

October 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMorag

am I the only one who saw the first cake as "Preak or Preating"? yes??

October 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKatherine

Yeah for Mickey's Not-So-Scary Halloween! My favorite place to go Trick or Treating as a 30-something adult with no children.

October 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAl

I've called my Aunt Jennifer, "antigen" ever since I was little. :)

October 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterDanielle

That mummy that even a cake? Or cupcakes, or anything? It looks like a pile of frosting on a board. Maybe some people like that, I know kids probably would, but I need a little substance with my sugar rush.

October 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMolly Musaka

We just got back from the DW Not So Scary Halloween and it was great! Haunted Mansion is my favorite ride so I was extra excited and we are actually 30 and 40-somethings with no kids who went trick or treating there.

October 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterLaura

Too bad the baker didn't have plastic words for cake #6. "creppy" is about the only thing on that cake that's not plastic.

October 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterPuppygirl

Geez, Jen, I expect you to not miss these easy pickings.
It's not a pirate mummy, it's a UNICORN pirate mummy. Get it right.

October 28, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJo

My dentist actually uses gummy things that he calls jujubees to remove caps on teeth that won't just pop off when he wants them to. He warms it a bit & then you bite down on it. When it's good and stuck, he will run cold water on it to make it hard and then you try to open your mouth. Too funny - but it works! Well,... unless you have it between two caps. Then it's a little dicey......

November 4, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSuphred

Love theses posts! And yes, a 30 something year old couple with no kids going truck or treating at Disney world is totally acceptable and normal! I'm an Auntie Jenn and my niece called me Jim for at least a year (she is only 3 now) and now it's Antigen :) she is super adorbs, so it matters none what she call me. Love your site and I will be purchasing your books for Christmas gifts for everyone! Keep up
The great work here! Love your humor!

November 13, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterAuntie Jenn

PostPost a New Comment

Enter your information below to add a new comment.
Author Email (optional):
Author URL (optional):
Some HTML allowed: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <code> <em> <i> <strike> <strong>