Here's a fun game for Father's Day: tell dad you got him a special cake that represents your relationship together. Make a big deal out of it - maybe work up a tear or two, if you can.
Then hand him this:
...and just look at him expectantly.
Remember, if you laugh, you'll totally ruin it.
I know you're scrolling down here looking for the answer, but in all honestly I have no idea what that is. Someone told me it's a hat, but I'm just not buying it.
Speaking of which, here's another "hat" I'm not buying:
You know, if it weren't for these punny sayings I wouldn't know what half the wrecks I see are supposed to be.
Not that this label is helping me any:
It looks like one of those awareness ribbons. Is there some new Handyman cause I should know about?
"Stop Corporate Tools. Support Your Local Handyman."
Dang it, now I kind of hope that's it.
Don't even tell me if I'm wrong; I need this to be a thing.
And now, some unfortunately fishy pole action:
Talk about the catch of the day!
No, on second thought, we'd better not.
("You should have seen it, guys! It was THIS BIG.")
I think I've featured this next cupcake cake [patooie!] design every year since Cake Wrecks began, and yet STILL the bakeries keep churning it out:
Seriously. Can you tell what this is? NO YOU CANNOT. Don't even pretend. If you can tell what this is, you're probably a witch. Or you weigh the same as a duck. Or you've been turned into a newt.
Harsh? Maybe a little. But you'll get better.
You don't mind a little course humor, do you?
Although, really, all I see is a sea-sick Fail Whale.
What, you don't see it?
[pointing] A WITCH!!
Father/child hand prints are SO last year. The newest thing?
Skeleton hand prints.
(Five bucks says you just counted those "fingers.")
(You did, didn't you?)
(A-HA!! I knew it.)
(Wait, what are you doing? Where are you taking me? WHY IS THIS DUCK HERE?!)
Ashley W., Leah Q., Jen W., Matt A., Kathy J., Jessica P., & Kat J., I'm NOT a witch. I'm not. And tell John to stay out of this discussion. THAT LEFTOVER BURRITO WAS FAIR GAME. Plus I was hungry.