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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Thursday
Jan242013

Bazinga!

Everybody sing!

 

Squashed kitties

 

Shorn kitties


Mangy balls of fur!


Crappy kitties

 

 Creepy...kitties?


STILL BETTER THAN A DOG.

 

 

Thanks to Laura T., Gina P., Celeste B., Chris S., Jesse S., and Anony M., for starting our day with a Big Bang.

 

Note from Jen: So far you guys have let me joke about self-help groups, glaucoma, and baby bags with no air holes, but I'm betting THIS - the ages-old cat vs dog debate - is the uncrossable line. LET'S ALL TUNE IN TO THE COMMENTS TO FIND OUT. :D

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Reader Comments (132)

Not going to weigh in on the debate, but I do want to show a little (very little) love for the mangy ball of fur kitty. While the frosting is atrocious, I love that the plastic face looks like a throwback to the Beistle die cut Halloween decorations of the 60s and 70s. Very nostalgic. The rest of the cake looks like crap, but I'd totally buy it for the face.

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterNagzilla

@Joelle - been there, done that, & doesn't need repeating - read her 1st book for details.

@PuppyGirl - dogs kill too. And yes, usually it's bad owners, but sometimes if it's a pack out in the country & your toddler's with you in your back 40 feet...(happened here in TX more than once.)
And they will kill cats, but I don't think I've seen/heard of a domestic cat killing a dog. Mountain lions kill a dog, sure, but a domestic cat?

Both are good, both are useful. (JessT, can I be Switzerland too?! Or maybe just a wise, all-knowing, neutral, martial arts master...:-)

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKarateLady

Uh-oh. I'm heading to the bunker. I'm bringing a nice pot of hot menudo, some tortillas and cotija cheese. The perfect meal for this weather. It's raining cats and dogs out here. See what I did there? Huh? Huh? *elbows neighbor in the ribs* Huh? Hahahaha!

*walks off singing, "J-E-N-Y-A-T-S-E...." *

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAndrea

Cats! Loved the poetry SuBee!

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLynn

All hail Sheldon Cooper!!

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterDakotah

I think shorn kitty is really kitty in a straitjacket! As far as cats vs. dogs, it's dogs all the way.

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJulse

I vote for dogs barely, as I am allergic to both but my dad is deathly allergic to cats. Soft Kitty is the only cat I am in favor of. ;-)

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJulie

I have cats and dogs- what is the problem?
Besides, Crazy "dog" Lady just does not have the same ring to it and I FULLY intend to grow old as disgracefully as I possibly can........
So, bring it on, I found the post funny, there is not conflict of interests unless you really wish to make on.

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKirri

A group of cats is a 'clowder''. Or a 'glaring' . You should know that now that we have one.... This is Zazzles. He's very zazzy.
-Sheldon

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterWendycakes

So this is what we found when we opened the box with Schrödinger's cat??

<3 Cats!

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSneakyAmanda

Ok, not sure this went through the first time. If the comment below looks Identical to my previous one, then DELETE THIS ONE. Thank you, Wreckssistant! (or if the other's not printed & this one's better, delete that & keep this!)

Can we *not* fight on my birthday? NO?!?!?!?!? :-) Ok, fine, I'm goin' to the bunker & taking my GF cake & ice cream with me. Gonna try a new GF recipe for chocolate mousse...(I'll save some for all the CW regulars...)

PS @ Craig - that idea about forwarding the hate mail is excellent! :-)

<Walks into Bunker...Door thunders shut...>
"Hi ya, Theardare! <gives him some major scratching behind his left ear>

"I love what you've done with the Atrium. Those mustaches are just the right touch!"

<meow, meow, meow...meeeeooow?>

Yeah, it's my birthday. Ok if I go hangout? Thanks! I brought a bunch of Jackie Chan movies - love his moves! Just wish they had English subtitles...don't have my old college friends to translate for me..."
<meow?>
"Yeah, it's been years...those were some good times..."
<Pops in a DVD, plops down on the couch with a slice of cake & a bowl of ice cream & starts the movie...>

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKarateLady

DOGS!!! Dogs ARF-riendlier, ARF-abulous! Dogs will play with you. Dogs will be compassionate when you're sad or sick. Dogs will protect you (sometimes from evil UPS delivery guys.... but also when you really need it!) Cats on the other hand are self-centered, aloof and standoffish.

Needless to say, I prefer dogs.... but I think I AM a cat.

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJeneric

Cats are Satan's spawn
Untrustworthy, plus dander
Dogs are love unbound

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLulubelle B

Like 'em both so I'll just perch happily on the fence.
On a side note, that dog looks like a doggy version of Colonel Meow.

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered Commentermsyendor

Love dogs, love cats, but I'm on the lazy side, and dogs need so much more attention than cats, so cats win me. ;-) Plus, cats smell better. And some will exfoliate your nose for you.
Oh, and I too have had cats that drool. Plus, my favorite cat came when I called him, played fetch with me, and followed me everywhere, even into the shower; he was part cat, part dog, part human. I miss you, Aristotle.

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJasry

Cats rule, dogs drool. Bazinga!

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterkmbc

I love my cats, my dogs love me... that is the difference between the two!

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJen

Be Ye Warned, fellow Wrekkies! We are on the cusp of a rip in the time-space continuum here, trying to handle this sort of monumental debate in a blog comment section!

Next it will be dogs and cats, living together - MASS HYSTERIA!

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAgent B

Gotta vote for cats! They provide hours of entertainment when playful, and hours of snuggling when resting. One of mine comes when called AND plays fetch! Just as good as a dog with less mess and less maintenance. My 2 also always stayed by my side when I was sick or sad, just laying there being purring, soft, furry little heating pads. <3 YAY CATS!

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterShannon

My dog sleeps on the top back of the couch the cat sleeps on the floor and occasionally tries to talk .... A bit of species confusion at my house, but the cat is big enough the other dog (mini dachshund) walks under him with no problem. We just like neurotic animals it seems. Are you sure those are cats? Pretty sure some are aliens.

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterjoy

One of today's posts on Cute Overload: http://cuteoverload.com/2013/01/24/the-eternal-battle-of-dog-vs-cat/

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterGuest

Now let's sing it as a round....

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJaime

I'd be surprised if you got many hate comments, you said something bad about dogs, cat people are the crazy ones...dog people don't have defend to defend themselves. They just know which species is better! ;)

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAshlee

What a lot of Catty remarks!

Love cats.
Love your posts!

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKathleen

Happy Birthday KarateLady!!! Can I come join you and bring my Star Trek TOS with me? That way you can explain all the subtler things I miss. I have GF brownies! Can we teach Theardare to sing the TPG song? **J-E-N-Y-A-T-S-E** has been stuck in my head for 2 days now...

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJodee in WA

A dog sees you pick up after it, feed it, give it affection and it thinks “YOU ARE GOD!”
A cat sees you pick up after it, feed it, give it affection and it thinks “I AM GOD!”
That is the only difference.
Personally I love both. Sometimes I like to worship, sometimes I want to be worshipped. It’s all good.

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterArtemis

That pink ball of icing with pink piles of icing nearby is a travesty. TRAVESTY.

Also, being expected to pay $20 for the dog cake at the bottom. Also a travesty.

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

Things getting too quiet at CWHQ, eh? Why do I have a difficult time imagining that.

#1 Looks like something that lived in my closet when I was three.

#2 "Well, we're out of food coloring and the oven isn't working, so I had to improvise."

#3 Flotsam. Saving wrecks from the dumpster since (whenever flotsam was invented).

#4 Wreckerator: "I don't think this new 'bubble gum' frosting is going to be a winner, boss." Boss: "Use it anyway -- corporate says we can't order until we use what we have."

#5 I knew chupacabra was real!

#6 Dogs are usually festooned with bows when they come from the groomer. The only way this one is post-groom is if the groomer also decorates cakes, which is a combination I don't even care to contemplate.

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

This post is absolutely correct -- three opportunities to eat cakes (of kitties) is better than one opportunity to eat one cake (of a dog), especially when they all look awful. So cat cakes > dog cakes. Nom the kitties.

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterA Dog Lover

Cat. 'nuff said. =^_^=

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMapleGirl

That's not a cat, that's a fox that changed the copier toner.

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSharon

AND ALL FOR 19 bucks! Oh boy!

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterStoich91

"Incorrect. Obviously, the answer is cheese Danish."

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterTrudy

As for me...
"I only like Hippo-pota-musses -
and Hippopotamusses like me too!"

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBarb B

I think the item on the board with Crappy Kitty is a sperm. And Crappy Kitty seems to be deathly afraid of it.

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

It's 27 degrees out today, and I don't have to take my cats for walkies. That alone makes them the winners. Plus mine are loving and cuddly, and one even does mroe tricks than either of my sisters' dogs (sitting to beg, shaking hands, rolling over, etc.).

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterkayk

That pink thing in the 4th photo (NOT a cat) is some sort of ultraviolet alien chasing after . . . its brain?

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterFM

A cat that does tricks, @kayk? You're being played. Either some sort of feline experiment or there is one doozy of a quid pro quo in the offing. Be careful...

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

@ Jodee in WA - GF BROWNIES?! Heck, YEAH!!!! So it'll be a half n half ST:TOS & Jackie Chan marathon, then... :-) But I'm not sure I want to try teaching Theardare to sing...He doesn't sing in Rm101, ya know...he's just the DJ from H*LL in there... <shudder> <flashbacks> "At the Copa, Copacabana...." "If you like Pina Coladas and gettin' caught in the rain...if you're not into health food...." "HEEEEYYY Macarena!" "...Sir, I want to buy these shoes...for my Mama, please ..." ...AAIIGGGHHH!!

Oh, where was I? Oh, yeah - I'll meet ya @ the Bunker door, Jodee!
<Hops up & runs from den, passes the game room on the left, the TPC meeting room on the right, takes shortcut thorough the gym to avoid Theardare's room & Room 101, then goes thorough the atrium, to the door... and, finally, (pant-pant-pant), spins open the hatch...CREAAAAAK>
<Waves hopefully - Jooooooodeee...Ooooover here...>

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKarateLady

Let's all have a round of applause for SuBee's comment.
Also, dogs.
That is all.

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKate

Once again it's time for "What does my 2 year old think these are?"

1 birfday cake
2 kitty birfday cake
3 monster birfday cake
4 blobby (bubble?) birfday cake
5 doggie birfday cake
6 doggie (not identified as cake)

On a related note, my kids are way more fun than the cat that we live with. I'm not pro-dog either. I do appreciate that other people have and love pets, but my favorite animal is still the human (and I also believe firmly in the food chain).

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKdot

I will now have "Soft Kitty" in my head for days, but anything that combines BBT and CW is good in my book. As for the cat/dog debate, I like both, but dogs are better. After living with my MIL and her 5 cats for a year, my fondness for cats dwindled a bit. I never like female cats though, every one I ever had was either a total biatch , went psycho, or both.

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterfluffy-girl

My son and I are deathly allergic to cats, and I was bitten by a cat when I was 4. So I vote for dogs, even though they require more attention.

Having said that, in spite of my un-fondness for cats, these wreckerators should be reported to the Humane Society and other ruling authorities for cruelty to animals. And cake.

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterTLC

Jen, sweetie, whatever you're on, I want some! :) You are crazy funny!

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJuls from Houston

I am so grateful for your blog. After a shitty day at work, I unwind and laugh out loud to your comedy and pictures. Thank you!!

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered Commenteremily

Dogs. Hands down. Nothing like puppy breath. =)

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAuthorAshton

"There's nothing wrong with a shorn kitty."

OMG Catherine OMG I am still cracking up, LMAO at your double entendre. But it could be lack of sleep and an immature sense of humour combined...

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSue

Cats all the way! :D

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAnn

Happy Birthday @KarateLady!

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAndrea

As the Celeste B. who submitted cat #3, I have some things to say. Dogs are WAY, TOTALLY, ALL THE WAY BETTER THAN CATS. Also, my husband is allergic to cats. Another reason right there to love dogs. I feel totally awesome that my picture finally got posted!!!!

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterCeleste Blinn

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