My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Taste The Rainbow

[gazing dramatically into distance]  

Sooome... WHERE.... oooover the rainbow!

My, oh my.


There's a cake that I heard of

Once that I'd like to buy.


Some... ONE... spelled out the colors!


Chris is "blue."


Why... did... the wreck-er-a-tor

Pipe the instructions, too?


Someday I'll get into my car
And drive until the wrecks are far behind me!

("Scarlett around the Edge")


Where "banquet"'s spelled right in the shops

And no one tries to sell cake flops

That's where yooouuu'll FIIINNND me!


Some... WHERE... ooover the rainbow

Bakers try.


They... don't... write out instructions

Those are the cakes I'll buy.


If happy customers can buy

Cakes with a "rainbow"
why ooohh whyyyy
caaaaan't I?


Thanks to Tristan S., Vern M., Tim L., Debi G., Sarah B., David H., Brenda T., Karen B., Stephanie D., and Sahara H. for really bringing the house down.


Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.

« Weekly Wreck Up 2/7/14 | Main | Look Out, Germany »

Reader Comments (48)

I see Trstan’s cake, his name is blue,
What’s wrong with that? “Chris” is blue, too.
And I think to myself, what a wonderful wreck.

I see “congrats” in red, a lovely duck,
They’re not quite right, but what the hell.
And I think to myself, what a wonderful wreck.

The colors of the rainbow, were never meant to be,
Put down on cakes we ordered in the mash-up that we see.
Red looks just like yellow, and brown is white,
Scarlett’s name and color aren’t quite right.

I close my eyes and hope to see,
A bankquet of colors running free.
And I’ll think to myself, what a wonderful wreck.

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

*headdesk* I wonder what is wrong with people

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

Rainbow Objection (remix)
Why are there so many color blind bakers.
Producing cakes that aren’t right?
Why is my cake clad in yellow and dark brown,
When I asked for red, blue and white?
Purple’s not pink, though most choose to ignore it.
And black isn’t blue, can’t they see?
If someday they get it,
I’ll throw a huge bankquet
For all of you guys and for me.

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

@SuBee: Brava!!!

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

I don't see this in any existing comments, so of course when it shows up there will be 30 (cough *Epcot*) comments identical to mine. The Blue and Gold one is a horrendous misspelling, but the banquet it refers to is actually called the Blue and Gold Banquet. It's a Cub Scout thing - ours is at the end of this month.

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterClaire

As for the last one, only in New Jersey is brown a color of the rainbow.

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterRoy

I think my favorite wreck is "scarlet around the edge." Thank goodness you included the subtitle, because I never would have figured out what that said. I have terrible handwriting, but at least I have never sought work as a wreckerator. I wonder if the kid's name is Scarlet, or if the lettering around the edge was supposed to be colored scarlet? We may never know...

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJodi

Bravo! This one needs a video, since the "team" made the post, I think some nice 3-part harmony and dreamy music is called for here.

It will lessen the hurt....

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered Commenterbassgirl

Am I the only one who is sitting here with a rosy (well, maybe violet) vision of Cake Wrecks fans around the globe, warbling these three fine parodies in front of their computers? Someone should do a video. *Sings like Kermit*: "🎶La la-la LA la-la-la..."🎵

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterPersephone

I was waiting for a good reference to a "horse of a different color". There's got to be a good wreck out there that'd capture that phrase.

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJK

I find these totally hilarious. However, my dad's best friend's nick-name is RED. Not that this is a cake for him, but, it could have been!

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterChristine

No one can convince me that that's not play-dough on the last one. Ewwww.

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSusan

Of the three filks I see at the moment, I don't know which one's best!

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterClassic Steve

@SuBee -- you are on FIRE today!
in yellow

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterMaureen

SuBee---I'll never hear those two songs in quite the same way again. Thanks for the laugh! (I have to admit, when I first started reading each post, I thought that it was Sharyn...)
I wonder what "Red" is being congratulated for...

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterCarol

Cakes for the color blind. Lovely.

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

@Susan: Yep, I'm with you. As soon as I saw the last "rainbow" cake, I immediately thought they had decorated with play dough. Mmmm...salty.

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterMichelle

@Carol - Red is being offered congrtulations. I assumed that was the wreck part.

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered Commentersue

Maybe Tristan likes to wear yellow so it would be correct to say, "Tristan in yellow."
Red is being "Congrtulated" because that's how Red talks in his thick drawl. "Ya'll didn't have to congrtulate me! Ya'll are too kind!"
Roses green z for a color blind person and they are thoughtfully saving the person from exclaiming how much they love the pink and blue flowers on their cake.
Chris' nickname is obviously, Blue. I think because he has blue freckles as indicated on the cake.
The bakery instructor had to leave for the day so he left instructions on a cake as they had run out of notepads.
Scarlett around the edge...has no excuse.
Bankquet? Oh yes, that's a little inside joke at the bank. When the bank has a banquet they call it a bankquet. Those wild and crazy bankers!
Where is Red, White, and Blue going? Do you know?
You left out the word, "Pretty! It's Pretty in pink! Pretty in pink! Got it?"
Oops, someone forgot the green line in the rainbow and thought they could get away with airbrushing it in down at the bottom. Tsk tsk. Don't you remember? ROY G. BIV?!!!!!

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSandy

Cakewrecks comment. In black.

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterErica

Judy Garland would be soooo proud!

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterDaisy

Well, of course cake #2 is for Morgan Freeman's character in Shawshank Redemption when he made parole. Duh! ;)

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSaraV

Hee, Maureen!

I forgot to mention earlier, that I was very concerned that the duck seems to have a bullethole in his head.

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJodi

If I remember correctly, a "Blue and Gold Banquet" is an actual Cub Scout thing. Still misspelled, though.

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterErin Yvette

CW fans the world over are now channeling Judy Garland.

@SuBee Well done lady!

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJodee

I had to reread it in a quiet area to get the tune, but my oh my once I got the tune I can't help but hear Judy Garland singing in my head

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered Commentersam

Cabbage roses and scary rainbows. It's a Valentines miracle! Seriously, the rainbow... have these people never met Roy G. Biv?

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterCandace

Very funny post -- and the comments were as good as the wrecks! I am in awe of you all.

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterNancy

I'm surprised no one posted this yet: where do bakers go to weigh their pies?

(somewhere over the rainbow)

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterAriel

Color My World

As I’m quite blind, I cannot see
Colors the way they’re s’posed to be.
And now, now in this job,
I do my best to just follow directions
And dream that I’ll get just one thing right.
Color my cakes with hopes of pleasing you.

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

Just picture me running through a bakery, leaping over display cases (ala Pocahontas) as my flowing hair flies behind my 12 inch waist. PICTURE IT, DAMN IT!

You think you own whatever cake you’ve purchased
And icing’s just some goop that’s in a bag
But I can turn that goop into a treasure
If you pay me the price that’s on the tag.

You think that Tristan’s name should be in yellow
Congratulations needs more than just one “A,”
But I say pink can really be light purple
And what I say is true 'cause it is what I say.

Have you ever filled an order for a bankquet cake?
Or asked if Scarlett’s color was her name?
Can you make a patriotic yellow-brown cake?
Decorate with all the colors that I make?
Decorate with all the colors that I make?

How great is that dead duckie , though?
And my fine roses; both green and yellow.

So you’ll never fill an order for a bankquet cake,
For skills like mine are nothing you can fake.
You’d need to make a rainbow out of play-do,
And decorate with all the colors that I make.

You can bake a cake and still
You just don’t have the skill:
Decorate with all the colors that I make

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

Egad. Not just the head/desk factor, but gee...the "Congratulations Red" looks as though it was written on a block of "cee-ment"! Most of the others the "rainbow"? The plasticine is BACK! (ack.)

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered Commenterkrunchifrog


Who's gazing down on cakes clad in rainbows?
Smiling at all wrong spellings they see
Who's trying to decipher bad writing?
Everyone knows it's Wreckies...

D'you wait for Jen to post something awful?
Poo-swirls or airbrushed broccoli trees
Want a mohawked baby carrot-jockey?
Then you know you're a Wreckie...

And Wreckies will laugh out loud
Pass haiku and songs around
And Wreckies have always found
The greatest wrecks (the greatest wrecks, the greatest wrecks)

All Wreckerators cower in fear now
Banning all cell-phone cameras they see
Who's trying hard to capture the wrecks, now?
Everyone knows it's Wreckies...

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterStarknight

Word-bug has bit, so here's some more:

Not found in Nature:
A bizarre Play-doh rainbow.
No black lights in sky.

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterStarknight

What a Wreckerful World

I see roses of green,
Gray roses too.
I see them piped,
for me and you.
And I think to myself,
what a wreckerful world!

I see icing of "Blue"
and "Holly" in white,
the bright messy cakes,
the dark sloppy frights.
And I think to myself,
what a wreckerful world!

The colors of the rainbow,
so brownish in the sky.
Shocked looks on the faces,
of people going by.
I see friends shaking heads
Saying, "WHAT DID YOU DO?"
They're really saying,
"Looks like poo."

I hear babies cry,
because they know
they'd do much better
than what you have shown.
And I think to myself,
what a wreckerful world!

Yes, I think to myself
what a wreckerful world.

Oh, bleahhhhhh!

[My first wrecked song parody. Not great, but I had fun!]

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered Commenterpikkewyntjie

Yes, I sang both songs out loud.

No, I wasn't able to get through either one without snickering.

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterE.Anne

@pikkewyntjie- Excellent job. Congadelations!!!

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

I want whatever SuBee's having today... :-)

Rainbows galore, but
How did pooh brown get in there?
"Hurk" says my stomach.

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterRachel CrazyMum


..Because then where would we be, without you? :)

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterKarin

Each time I see instructions written down on a cake in CW, I still can't help but wonder if those wreckerators are brain-damaged people or immigrant bakers that unfortunately don't understand English.

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterAthena

Bravo, SuBee!!!!!!! Especially like the "Colors of the Wind" one!!! :D

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered Commenteranony mouse

That last one looks like it was decorated with play-doh.

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered Commentermarfie

I am just a duck
made from expired toothpaste
and a bowling ball.

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

@pikkewyntjie: Actually, it's wonderful! And the most important thing--you had fun!

@SuBee: I just have one question: what's play-do?

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSaraCVT

I just learned that it's really hard to sing while laughing/snickering. The songs and comments are awesome. The cakes? Not so much.

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterEmily

Great job, CW team! And the songsters, woot!

But I see no mention...tell me, am I the only one?

I heard every "unsung" title in William Shatner's voice and style! Is this a new bug going around? Ear bleach, anyone?

Well now I know what not to order in terms of birthday cakes lol.

February 7, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

Yep! The "Blue & Gold Banquet" is an annual event in every Cub Scout Pack. It commemorates the anniversary of BSA being formed. The official colors of Cub Scouting is blue & gold. Ironic that the wreckerator got it right...and yet still wrong.

February 7, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterL.A. Browning

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