My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Kiss Off!

This meeting of Leprechauns Who Can't Get Kissed on St. Patrick's Day (LWCGKSPD) will now come to order. Welcome, supernatural wee folk!

Now, let's go around the circle and share the excuses we got this year. Seamus?

"Well, I'm not sure it's an excuse per se, but most of them yelled a lot about me getting out of their bedrooms."


"A few said something about Hallie Tosis, but I've never even heard o' the lass!"


"They said I was too hairy." [belch]


"Too blonde."




Oooh, rough luck, guys. Clover joins us this year as an honorary member. Clover, how'd your St. Paddy's go?

"They said I was too needy. Me! Oh, and apparently crying is a 'turn-off.' So, you know, long story short: NOBODY got lucky."


"Hey, speak for yourself, Clover! A pack of pretty young things told me me nose reminded 'em of Owen Wilson!

"Best. St. Paddy's. EVER!"


Thanks to Sam G., Claire O., Gwynn R., Dan B., Tangie H., Jennifer M., & David B. for making sure that glistening schnoz will be haunting my dreams tonight. [shudder]


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Reader Comments (30)

Sung to: The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything

We are the Irish, who don't get any kiss
When we stare at you, you stand your ground
And when we ask you, for a little kiss
You just tell us, we've hal-i-to-o-sis

Well, we know that we're too hairy and we use too much peroxide
And we really like to talk about the turtles at the mall
And we know the clover's needy, and we've got a case of wang face
And that's why we never get a kiss at all.

March 18, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

Not sure just which part of Owen Wilson I'm seeing in that PanWow cake! (Ewwwwwwwww!)

March 18, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterZippy

That first one looks like the new photo of the "Two-and-a-Half Men" kid that hit the news this weekend...

March 18, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJuls

These Cakes are slightly Creepy. I didn't realize people bought cakes for St. Patrick's Day. Although the first one is kind of adorable, the rest are just extremely creepy looking, I don't think I would want Those in my house starring at me whenever i'm getting food from the kitchen. I think I would just rather stick to not having a cake on St. Patty's day.

March 18, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterCassandra L.

For some reason today, every single one of the narratives for these beauties really got to me. By the end of reading this edition I wanted to go take a shower and then hide in a dark quiet place. Shudder....

March 18, 2014 | Unregistered Commenterbassgirl

I am reasonably sure the last one wasn't referencing Owen Wilson's NOSE....

March 18, 2014 | Unregistered Commentermiss_paper

"Too blonde"??? WTF (What the Frosting?!?!)

March 18, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterFranP

Clover sort of reminds me of that paperclip dude from Microsoft Windows who always wants to 'help' you, even when you don't want to be helped, and even when you DO need help, he just confuses you. Maybe that's why he didn't get the love.

You help me find my boss's favorite font, I'll take you home. Deal?

March 18, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSaraCVT

Haaaa hahahaha

March 18, 2014 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

Is that a mini bagel instead of a buckle on Owen Wilson's hat?

Yes, they ARE shudder worthy...

Pan Wow creepy cake
Unlucky three leaf clover
The Saint is now DOOMED.

March 18, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterVBeach Alemap

A Leprechaun by any other name is still a TROLL!

March 18, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSusan

So creepy.

March 18, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterBarbara

I don't remember ever having seen THAT part of Owen Wilson in any of his films that I've seen. Did I miss something somewhere?

March 18, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJoeMama

I don't get the Owen Wilson comment. Why Owen Wilson?

March 18, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

it's the long dark green turd on the hairy guy that really turned my own stomach! Thank you for sharing? ;)

March 18, 2014 | Unregistered Commenterdonnio

Love the vampire shamrock with the green blood coming off his teeth. The last leprechaun looks like they put a penis in place of his nose. So not appetizing.

March 18, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterReets

Sooo that last one is a heart-shaped cake turned it a Valentine's Day leftover?

Also, all the eyeballs on the cakes are really creeping me out!!

March 18, 2014 | Unregistered Commenterlindzijo

Amy, Owen Wilson has a long, crooked nose. As for the other body part people are referring to, I can neither confirm nor deny any crookedness.

March 18, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJodi

#4 The long green turd didn't bother me as much as the mealworm beard. Yuk!

March 18, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSusan

Yeah... (blinkblink)... NOT "Owen Wilson"... **shudders**

March 18, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterBADKarma

"wang face" **snort** Thanks @Sharyn!

March 18, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJodee

I think the 3-leaf Clover looks like wimpy broccoli

March 18, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterNerdyLutheranChick

Oh why did I have to look closer at the shiny nose?? Lmao I really should know better but unfortunately I will never learn and will have the nightmares to prove it. Wreckerators should go into the nightmare business lol.

March 19, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

Cake 2 reminded me of the late, great actor Pete Postlethwaite ( if he had played a leprechaun).

March 19, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterCynthia

I'm thinking none of them got kissed because none of them have lips, but I really don't think the cakes would have been improved by the addition. Yeah. Definitely not.

March 19, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterMuria

#1 looks like a hillbilly leprechaun, one buck-tooth.

The blonde ones look like some type pf demented furby....eugh.

March 19, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterNerfbomb


March 20, 2014 | Unregistered Commenterlisadh

Pan Wow!! Making the comeback!!

The "too blonde" still has me laughing!

March 20, 2014 | Unregistered Commentershannon

And here I was thinking the "nose" cake was a likeness of a younger Judge Reeve Alvin Valkenheiser. Talk about gross out. BWAHAHAHAHAhahahahaha!

March 21, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterAdo Annie

I'm pretty sure the heart on the third one should really say "kill me". He looks like he's in pain...

April 10, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterDjoseph

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