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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Monday
Oct302017

Halloween Tips

Tomorrow's the big day, people, so before you hit the streets to go trick-or-treating, here are some useful "guidelines" for having a safe and scream-worthy night:

Never accept rides from strangers. 

Especially if you see fingers hanging out of the trunk.

 

 Wear reflective clothing:

Or just something so unbelievably hideous that people won't be able to NOT notice you. You know, like Crocs and a Speedo. (As a bonus: EVERYONE will want your picture!)

 

Watch out for roving gangs of lower-case Ms:

They're vicious this time of year. VICIOUS.

 

If you're trying to scare someone, don't yell "Boo!" It's not scary enough. 

Instead yell, "SCARY BOO!"

 It also helps if you can throw spiders on them.

 

Never assume you know what someone's costume is. 

 One person's Elvis is another's Dracula, and you really don't need that kind of awkwardness.

"I vant choo to stay off of my blue svade shoos! Muah! Ah! Ah!"

 

ALWAYS SAY "THANK YOU."

Even if they give you crap candy like generic lollipops and little bags of candy corn*:

*Actual candy we will be giving out on Halloween. Plus little boxes of Milk Duds. Y'all come by, y'hear?

 

And try to look grateful when you're saying "thank you," too -  not like this:

"This is my happy face."

 

Lastly, and mostly importantly...

BEWARE THE TOILET PAPER TERROR:

 He also goes by "The Spirit of Gasses Past."

 

Thanks to Carly T.,  Leah K., Catherine S., Chryss A., Kris D., Chris B., Brianna M., Denil B., & Jennifer G. for really wiping the floor with these wrecks.

*****

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Sunday
Oct292017

Sunday TREATS: Halloween!

You know when you go to a haunted house, how there's the usual super scary corpse-undertaker-chasing-you-with-a-blood-covered-chainsaw section? And across the parking lot there's the happy-hayride-pumpkin-patch-and-face-painting-with-the-kids section? That's where you'll find today's Halloween Sweets. Today there's nothing to be scared about, except overdosing on cuteness!

Not to mention sweetness.

By Rebecca of Sugar Creations

A cake covered in candy? I can handle that. 

 

How luscious is this caramel apple cake? It looks so real I'm tempted to take a bite just for authenticity's sake.

By Andrea's SweetCakes

 

I'm trying to be scared by this spooky graveyard cake, but ... nope! Too cute! See the wee little jack-o-lantern?

By Crafty Confections

 

Hmmm, speaking of jack-o-lanterns maybe I'll try to carve all of mine out of cake this year, because a) smaller odds of accidentally stabbing myself again, and b) tastier leftovers!

By The Ladygloom

 

Now this is a happy cake!

Made by Cake Central member preciouspjs

These monsters don't want to eat your entrails, they just want to see you smile! Love the different textures of 'fur.'

 

Ok, this next cake is by far the absolute cutest thing I've seen all day:

By Jen's Cakery

And that includes those newborn hedgehog pictures that are going around the internet and also my own children.

 

If some awesome person delivered these amazing cookies to my house, I would ban everyone from eating them, and display them as decorations instead. All year long.

By East Coast Cookies

 

It's never too soon to introduce the kids to Halloween, and not just because that means more free candy for you! (No, actually that's a good enough reason.)

By SugarRush Treats

SO CUTE! Look at the tiny droplets of blood on the vampire's fangs!

 

Now, if you are not delighted by this cake and its vivid colors, bats silhouetted by the moon and baby grand piano, you might be a Halloween Scrooge.

By The Well Dressed Cake

(Coincidentally, if you are looking for a great Halloween movie, rent A Christmas Carol with Jim Carrey, because that was the scariest shiz I've ever seen.)

 

The more I look at this cake, the more I'm floored by the details:

By Andrea's SweetCakes

 Tiny bones and fallen leaves. Itty bitty bats with fangs! Haphazardly hanging shutters! And so well-done too. I've never seen skeletons and gravestones looks so gosh darn adorable.

 

And finally, can you make it past the fearful fondling tentacles and eerie eyeballs of this cake? Beyond the ghostly guardian, over the circular sentinels, through the clingy cobwebs and up the slimy staircase to the haunted mansion?

By Good Gracious Cakes

 Go on, try it. I double dare you.

Yeah, you go on ahead...

I'll uh, just be over here getting my face painted.

 

Have a great Halloween!

*****

Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.