Sobering Celebrations

Choosing the right cake design to go with your message is key. After all, you wouldn't want anyone to get the wrong idea, now, would you?

Aw, now there's a warm welcome.

(And if you think an overly enthusiastic volunteer fire brigade might spell disaster, you're wrong. It spells "neiborhood.")

Baptism, baseball...they both involve dunking, right?

[UPDATE: I have just been informed that baseball does not, in fact, have dunking. Apparently that's hockey. My bad.]

Ah, Niko. That boy is creeping up on death like a herd of geriatric turtles. Why, it seems like only yesterday you were playing with Thomas the Tank Engine, huh, Niko? Maybe because it WAS only yesterday, but still.

(No, the 5 is not a typo; this really was for a fifth birthday party.)

Whoops, Karen T., Karen G., & Tammy C., apparently geriatric turtles come in flocks.

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Hey all! john (the hubby of Jen) here. Do you love your daily Cake Wrecks? Do you feel like supporting us directly? Well now you can with a one-time donation here or a recurring donation here. Your support will help keep the lights on and the wrecks coming. And hey, If you can’t, that totally fine. We’re just glad you’re here. Wreck On!

Gray Is Bae

Help me out, minions: is this alien shrugging, or is that a snooty little handlebar mustache?

WRONG.

It's neither! 
 It's a unicorn.

::head tilt::
 ::eyes narrowing::

Or so they'd have us believe.

 Well, thank goodness unicorn cookies are easy. All you need is a horn, a mane, and an eye!

...
.....
........

Sweet merciful leprechaun trouser monkeys.

This is worse than I thought.

OK, hang on, hang on, I've got it: If bakeries make everything out of plastic - the eyes, the horn, even the ears - then there's no way a wreckerator can screw it up, right?

RIGHT.

In fact, here's an example from a bakery's order book:

See? D.L. made a great choice when she ordered this one: Literally the only thing the decorator has to pipe is some rainbow hair, and maybe a few flowers! 

This is a sure thing! This is in the bag! This is...

... Grandma Unicorn?

(Shh, she's "sleeping," kids.)

(We hope.)

Thanks to Kaitlin H., Dimi C., & D.L. for livening up that party.

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And from my other blog, Epbot: