My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

"Hey everybody, thish cake ish from Holland. Ishn't that veird?"

Brace yourself, my friends, for what you're about to see may haunt your dreams for the rest of your natural lives, and will most certainly turn you off of acrylic nails.


Here it comes...

Just when you thought it was safe to go back to the baby shower, they went and added...


[drawn-out scream]

Ok, what's worse: the bone-white skin pallor, popped-out belly button that looks like the tied-off end of a balloon, or the fact that Thing-ette there seems to be sucking the life-force out of Octo-Mom Wraith-style?

Now, I have pudgy little Hobbit hands, so my basis of reference is off: tell me, is that hand as disproportionally gargantuan as I think it is?

Kevin V., you musht be toight like a toyger*. Schmoke and a pancake?

*Ok, so the pop-culture references got a little out of hand** in this post. Sorry.

**Get it? Out of hand? Booyah!

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Reader Comments (266)

way to rock the 'wraith', yo.


February 24, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterek3.

I love it how they took the time to add the perky nipples, because you know pregnant normally have perky nipples

February 24, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterErin

I think I'm more concerned that someone made cake boobs...and what a rack.

February 24, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterStuffCooksWant

My god! It's like Voldemort's hand......if Voldemort was a drag queen.

February 24, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterIrishgirl

OK, I can't be the first to notice this....but NO COMMENT on thing?

Seriously, was this an icecream cake (har har) because someone sure looks cold!

February 24, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterheartafire

Did anyone happen to notice the extra digit UNDERNEAT the green shirt near the left (ahem) breast?

I really think the only thing that could make this cake creepier would be if the stomach were really a big giant water balloon with a little doll inside, and it was iced-over, and then when they performed the C-section, the "water" would actually break, and the baby would sort of float out through the incision.

Former L&D nurse

(Oh, no....thank YOU, I've really enjoyed it, good to your servers, I'll be here all week)

February 24, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterheartafire

um not only does the belly button look like that thing you stick in a turkey to let you know when its done, and not to mention the alien like hands that might be used to probe humans, but did anyone else notice the erect nipples??!!

February 24, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterangeluvsyou2

FINALLY! A "Stargate: Atlantis" reference! I KNEW there was a reason this was my favorite blog!

February 24, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterFoxTrottinKate

Cakes should not have nipples. Or fingernails.

And that's all I have to say about that.

February 24, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSusan

why must they put nipples on these cakes???? seriously, do we need to be that detailed??? it just keeps getting creepier.

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKatie

I live in Holland and they don't talk like that!

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Wraith! hahaha So glad that I know someone else who watches SGA! But that is one pastey belly

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSander

That is really, really ugly.

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAngie

Given how prominent the nipples are on this cake, someone had to decide how best of construct edible cake nipples and include them in the design.

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Hideous on every level. If that was the cake at my baby shower, I would run screaming back home...gotta wonder what the Mom-to-be's family and friends are all about ??? This has got to be in the top ten of Cake Wrecks.

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLynn

Ok, I'm 6' tall, and pregnant... One, my belly button does NOT look like that, thank God! Two, what the heck, no freakin' head?!?!?! Three that thing has got a HUGE mit! She'd put Troy Aikman to shame! WOW!

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterNicole

Why is it sitting on the french flag?

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSara

that is a very cool cake. Fred Smilek is the acting president of the Society to Save Endangered Species. It was founded two years ago by Fred Smilek along with his two best friends Charles and Jonathan.

February 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

You could not PAY me to eat any of this cake!

February 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMe

You made an SGA reference.

I think I love you.

February 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKessie

I asm just wondering exactly HOW cold it was in the room when they took the belly cast to make this mold from... i mean seriously... she could cut glass!!

February 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

ew ew ew

February 27, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterinspiredgoodness

I hate to be vulgar, but that "popped out belly button" totally looks like an up-opened condom with fondant over it! :X and the nails! Omgosh! Who's going to eat that one??

February 28, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAudrey

That hand looks like a facehugger from the movie Alien.

March 2, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJD

It reminds me of that creeeeeepy hand from Coraline, the book, not the movie. You know, the severed one that had a life of its own?

March 2, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Um. Someone had a fair point... whose job was it to actually MAKE those cake breasts? I mean really?

March 2, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

It's got to be a Dutch cake, I know the flag on the nails looks more French, but the plate the belly-cake is on is clearly the Dutch flag.

Bespidat- Oops, I forgot the carrot baby, Bespidat at the end here.

March 3, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKath

The erect nipples are a lovely touch.

March 4, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterandcloserstill

lol what is this?? Fred Smilek is the acting president of the Society to Save Endangered Species. It was founded two years ago by Fred Smilek along with his two best friends Charles and Jonathan.

March 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Am I the only person who thinks those are French flags rather than Dutch?

This is a creepy, creepy cake.

March 28, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterFinlala

I always loved CakeWrecks, and THEN you go and throw in a Stargate reference!


Just when i thought this place couldn't get any more full of win...

March 31, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I don't think anyone's mentioned yet that pregnant women are generally cautioned against getting manicures during pregnancy.

This cake is so disturbing.

April 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

When most of a country's population is whacked out on weed, what do you expect lol?!

May 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTrudi

honestly, that hand looks to be about the same size as mine..but i do have pretty long skinny fingers so shrug. *embarrassed for hand size* and i am 1/4 dutch. however, though i am quite pale, i'm not THAT white. and i've never had nails that long and those colors, so i think i'm safe. though it tempts me to, when i'm pregnant someday, take a photo modeled after this cake.. >:]

June 7, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterjenn

Is it just me or does the belly button look a condom?

July 10, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJG

wait.....the shirt of the wierd pregnant thing looks as though it has been put over the cake so hey must of made breasts out of cake and then covered it in the icing.


August 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

"Were the nipples necessary?"...nipples are always necessary--and appreciated :-)

August 30, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDamon Scott Hynes

Until I read all the comments about the nipples I thought those were her knees.

September 7, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterApril

Edward is lurking in the corner waiting to save Bella's life by ripping the baby from her womb-cake....

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterStephenie Meyer

why is it so white???

September 18, 2009 | Unregistered Commenternatalie

Uhm...all of you are missing the nipples. Do we really need those to be all poking up on the CAKE!?

October 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

This is hilarious. Thanks for making my day.

October 15, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRP

I'm sorry, nails and boobs are the least of my's the cutting into the belly that gets hinky. Yuck.


October 16, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I like the fact the there is a mysterious finger trying to scratch her (ahem) boobage.

October 29, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterChalene McGrath

Hahahahaha - Debbie Brown would be REALLY proud of that cake!

November 9, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterwhizkidforte

Not so sure that the hand is out of know what they say about more than a handfull being too much...

December 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Not only os this hand terrifying to most people but if that is what the mummy's hand looks like in real life that baby will stay in there forever.
The nipples are really something.
I have threatened my friends with death if this cake turns up at my baby shower.

January 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRebekah

Look at the huge nipples they gave her. What the hell?...

February 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Miss L.
What I wanna know is, where do ya make that first cut? And what do you get when you do it? Eeeeeeooooowwww!

February 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

ON top of being disproportionally huge, the creepy hand is also backwards.

March 22, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

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