My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Belly Cakes, Continued

I believe I ended yesterday by saying that belly cakes were in dire need of some serious sex appeal. Well fortunately, a couple of Anony Mice have come to the rescue. Now then, I'll just cue up some sexy saxophone "Muzak" for atmosphere...

[Accordion instrumental of the "Chicken Dance" begins to play]

Whoops! Haha! Sorry - wrong CD. [fumbling with disks]

[Sax rendition of "Whole New World" begins]

Theeere we go. Much better. Ok. Y'all ready?

Ta Da!

Or should I say "Ta Ta?" [wicked grin]

Something about this brings the image of Han Solo frozen in carbonite to mind. But hey, killer nips!

Still, it's just not sexy enough, you know? I mean, it still has some clothes on.

Enter the "Sexy Suds" belly cake!

This clean bit of fun was submitted by the baker herself, although she asked to remain anonymous. And hey, it IS a beautifully done cake - it's just also a pregnant torso wearing nothing but bubbles. (Woo woo woo!)

But you wanna know the best part? Anony writes:

"The highlight was that the belly was filled with custard and with a tacky little plastic baby inside. When the Mom-to-be cut into the cake she had to use forceps (kitchen-tongs) to remove the plastic baby. Honestly, it was VERY funny at the time."

Oh I believe you, my friend - I do. Just remember: It's all fun and games 'til it ends up on Cake Wrecks*. Or 'til mom-to-be's in in the delivery room talking smack and brandishing a pair of kitchen tongs. One of the two, anyway. ;)

*I admit it: This is a shameless plug to sell more CW aprons.

« Well, Cake IS My Drug of Choice... | Main | Return of the Belly Cake »

Reader Comments (111)

There was a plastic baby inside it?! Yuck!!

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMalibu Niki

Custard and a plastic baby? Oh, that's horrid. . . wish I'd thought of it.

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSusan T-O

The second cake is actually quite clever. Creepy, but clever.

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous


...they look pretty well made, but still. would you plunge a knife into the dome of the belly without thinking twice? I know i would...

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMad Izatie

A custard-filled belly cavity and a plastic baby removed with tongs? It might have been funny at the time, but now? It's just revolting!!!

"Hans" Solo? Prepare to have the Star Wars fans go after you in a rage.

And before I read the commentary, I thought that second cake was covered in popcorn, not fondant bubbles. Yikes.

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTed S. (Just a Cineast)

That is just so very wrong and disturbing, especially the fact that the belly was custard-filled. I would've been so grossed out if I were a guest at that shower!

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterEm

I love that the second cake just has to say "Ready to pop?" It's almost as if they saw your earlier posts and have decided to see how ridiculous they can get their cake to look!

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Sexy suds is a home decorator. You can tell by the aluminum foil covered cake board. Even the worst bakeries wouldn't do that.

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The worst part has to be cutting into the cake. It's just so... murdery.

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterChelle

Cake Wrecks? No, Cake RETCH.

I maintain my support for formal rules (punishable by death) stating that no internal biological process (heck, maybe some external ones too) shall ever be recreated using fondant or the like. Ever.

This almost got as ugly as those toe-tag cadaver cakes.

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterEl Comodoro

The bubbles cake would be cute if it weren't, you know, a naked pregnant woman with an ooze-covered plastic baby inside.

Seriously, I guess I haven't been to enough baby showers lately. I had no idea decapitated amputated pregnant torsos were all the rage.

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMJS

See, I was just expecting these to be MUCH worse, based on the build up you gave them yesterday. Stil.....

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTrevor

I will admit, for as awful and tacky as fishing the plastic baby out of custard sounds - it probably was reallllly funny if you were there at that shower. And the bubbles on that 2nd cake are pretty. I'm clearly having a "glass half full" kind of day.

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCake for Breakfast

lol that was a rather ingenious and very strange idea to put a baby in the cake :)

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBilby P. Dalgyte

How very creepy. The second one reminded me of all the weird pregnancy dreams of taking the baby out of my belly to play with it or check on it and then putting it back when I was done. But they usually involved a zipper. :)

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHotHeaded

OMG...that does remind me of frozen Han Solo!

Now as for the 2nd cake, again I don't like it personally (nor the plastic baby idea) but it sounds like the people who planned it sure had fun so why not?

I wish we had pics of the c-section.

WV: comin That baby's comin!

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterPink

it's SO wrong but it's SOOO funny. i can't wait for one of my friends to get preggo now!

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered Commentervery married

I agree with those who said the 2nd one was clever, but I do think they're both just creepy. WICKED creepy, lol.

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDiane - DB Impressions

Personally, I think the idea of cutting open a cake belly is beyond creepy, but if that's what the Mom-to-Be wants, then I say have at it!

And the 2nd cake may be an amateur baker, but I think it's the best belly cake I've seen so far.

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAngie

You had me until the forcepts/baby extraction/custard placenta bit. Gah, indeed.

With that said, Custard Placenta is like the best Indie band name ever.

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJeremy

When I scrolled down to the second cake, my four year old started singing "It's the Mickey Mouse clubhouse!"
Sometimes his eye is better than mine.
Good stuff (custardy baby excluded, of course).

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJennifer

There words. (Although I KNOW that "sexy" isn't among the first thousand words to finally surface...)

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDangGina

If you look at the zoomed in version of the second cake, the belly button is the *cutest* little curly q.

I mean...bad. Bad bad.

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAyse

I agree--the first one does remind me of Hans Solo frozen...and the second one made we wonder if the poor woman drowned. Yikes.

wv: nockin: I am not knocking Star Wars, I am agreeing with Jen

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterjoyce

Custard and plastic baby. Ick. But, I guess we can be thankful they didn't add in some raspberry jam...

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterStuffCooksWant

Oh good lord...

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAleesuhn_Muhree

the first cake makes me want to cry. it's hysterical and ridiculous at the same time.

this isn't a prego belly cake, but it is a headless, arm/leg-less torso cake that appears is going for the sexy-torso-cake thing. I think the worst part of this one is the panties/bikini bottoms and the line going between her legs. CREEEEEPY!

aside from the creepy factor, it's seems to be well made.

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterChristy

I have to admit to being a touch let down...okay--a lot.
I guess I was expecting something in the realm of a "How To MAKE a Baby" scenario. You know, REALLY "spicy." (Why not? There seems to be no real limit to the depravity these bakers are capable of. The tackier the better, seemingly.)
That first one looks like something that was washed up on the beach in a shark-infested area.
Those clear half-bubbles, though, are darling. (Whoa! I found a redeeming quality...sort of.)

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

Okay, I've never posted here before, but I come here daily. I have to comment on that second cake. A custard filled belly and a "baby" being delivered by forceps. GROSS! The only thing that would make it worse is if the cake was red velvet!


April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I love the bubble cake! Anyone who has been massively pregnant will recognize the bathing problem so amusingly presented here - there is no bathtub in existence deep enough to accomodate an at-term tummy. You can submerge most of yourself, but you end up looking like a collection of volcanic islands in the ocean.

It's actually the most realistic pregger torso representation provided so far!

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The bubble-tum cake has a certain essence of vintage Lil Kim to it. Just a few Swarovski crystals and it's ready for the red carpet.

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterGlory von Hathor

plastic baby and kitchen tongs
laughing too hard to type anymore

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Is it wrong that I love the bathing belly cake complete with custard and fetus filling? Too cool.

All I got was a sheet cake. :(

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSherene

How horrible is it that I now WANT a belly cake JUST to send to Cake Wrecks when I have my first???? HA HA!!! These just make me laugh So much!!! Although, I have to admit, the one you posted where she was actually clothed was my favorite. it was actually kind of pretty...but again, kind of awkward to cut into. Again, bravo on a an EXCELLENT site that keeps me laughing every single day!!!!!!

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKirsten

OK, somebody help me. I'm know not a Star Wars devotee, but I know who Han Solo is...I just can't seem to find him in the first cake...pregant pause as I await assistance.....

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I'm afraid to admit this but...those are both kinda classy...modest...not too to awful.
Huh, must be the preggo brain (34 weeks and counting)

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKat

One of our co-worker's wives is expecting in October and I was discussing the shower with another co-worker the other day. My brain started boiling when she asked if I did belly cakes. Thank goodness we got interrupted by actual work.

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterThe Courteous Chihuahua

Ok, I have a sick mind. I admit it. But I can't be alone in associating "Ready to Pop" with the gigantic white blops all over that second cake. In my head, that is a cake for someone who really likes pregnant bellies, if you know what I mean.

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLulubelle

The plastic baby in the custard-filled cake is HILARIOUS!!!! I wouldn't do it to one of my friends, and I'd HATE for someone to do it to me, but that is FUNNY!!!

WV: pablan - Yeah, I have a sick sense of humor. Got a pablan with that?

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterNikki

Okay that is waaay to funny - after I finished reading your post yesterday I was thinking "why hasn't anyone thought of putting a baby in those bellies?"

I guess someone beat me to it...darn.

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAlexia

Cheers to the baker for recognizing the Wreck-tacular-ness.

I suppose it could have been worse.


April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterXOXO

The first one looks more like a guy with well-defined pecs and a beer belly than a pregnant torso to me,

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterjackie31337

Ted S. (Just a Cineast) said "Hans" Solo?Thank you for giving me the opportunity to share the always funny" REL="nofollow">Star Wars: Retold (by someone who hasn't seen it)

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterjackie31337

It is HAN Solo! It must be a major misconception to call him Hans because that's not the first time I've heard it. We made so much fun of my father-in-law when he called him Hans, in fact we still joke about it years later! Jen - I thought you were a sci-fi geek? Star Wars mistake aside, I love Cake Wrecks, it always starts my day off with a laugh: )

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKim in the Kitchen

Custard and baby. Interesting. I like the sudsy belly better than the top one, though.
~Amy B.

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

My husband was watching "Trashiest Weddings Ever" last night. I suppose that these are examples of the baby shower cakes these sort of people find appropriate. Fortunately, I will never be invited to either one of those occasions.

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

For the love of all things... well, of all things... STOP it!!! I have always thought these were a little strange, but now that I've got baby #2 in the oven, I'm more scared of them than ever!

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterWinona

I don't think I would be able to eat a cake that I had just seen a baby delivered from, even if it was a plastic one. LOL!

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered Commentercottoncolors

I'd never eat it, but the 2nd cake is seriously genius!

April 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa Newman-Evans

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