My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Transformers Going Down in Flames

I recently got an e-mail from Chunks the Pioneer, who told me she is a HUGE Transformers fan, and naturally went to the first 11:59 PM showing of Transformers 2. She also said,

"After seeing it [the movie] I got to thinking, why haven’t we seen any Transformer wrecks in honor of this occasion??? Please don't make me beg!"

Well, Chunks - may I call you Chunks? - first and foremost, I find it interesting that seeing Transformers 2 made you want to see (other?) things that are poorly made.

Hah! I kid, I kid. (Or do I?)

That said, I'm happy to share my extended collection of Transformers Wrecks with you. 'Course, you'd think there would be several Transformers cake kits out by now, but no, there's still just the one:

As you can see they spared no expense with it, though. Why, that piece of cardboard is actually printed in color.

The best thing about this design, however, is that no Wreckerator on earth can replicate it. It's true. "Pointy" is simply beyond this groups' skill set:

Optimus Prime battles the red fingers of doom.

Optimus Prime battles the great ketchup spill of '09.

Oh, wait, I take it back: this Wreckerator did manage "pointy":

But with fronds like those, who needs anemones? Eh? Eh?

And lastly, my favorite:

Mmm. Speckly.

Interestingly enough, this Wreckerator's '72 Pinto has those exact same flames airbrushed on the front bumper. Which is pretty darn ironic, if you think about it.

Hey Meagan D., Misty M., Alicia A., & Barbara N., what do you call an Autobot in denial?
Answer: A boat!

(Get it? Denial? De- Nile? The river? Yeah, us ex-JC skippers rule, thankyouverramuch.)

- Related Wreckage: Optimus Wrecks

UPDATE: My apologies to Chunks the Pioneer, who I mistakenly assumed was a guy, since she is, in fact, a girl. And thanks for having such a great sense of humor about it, Chunks. ;)

« Goodbye Captain Eo | Main | This One's For The Ladies »

Reader Comments (84)

I see following directions doesn't always produce results!

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBaking and Mistaking

Why is Optimus driving toward the fire, anyway?

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterdeckardcanine

You were a JC skipper! Awesome!

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterM'Lynn

"But with fronds like those, who needs anemones? Eh? Eh?"

OMG!!! Hilarious! Sorry, that one really gave me the giggles! But those cakes- so horrible, seriously, can't they learn how to make points? What's so hard about POINTS?!?


June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKritterBugg

While not total wrecks, it is disturbing to see how many people can't get car flames right.

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Hahahahahaha with fronds like these, who needs anemones!

That's A material.

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

"who needs anemones?" ROFL!

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterEm

"who needs anemones?" ROFL!

WV: guily: Oh, stop looking so guily, Marlin. You didn't lose Dory. And you'll find Nemo. Honest.

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterEm

The awesomeness of this site went through the roof with the revelation that you were a JC Skipper!

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSarah

anemones... Ha!

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered Commentertonyia

The second-last one looks like it's been topped with chillies...

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMs Avery

Those are, uh, nice. Yeah, lets go with nice.

Wasn't there a Hot Wheels design quite similar to this? Or was that post Transformers too? I am too lazy to go look. ha


June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Awesome fronds and anemones pun. I love it!

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

okay not to get really graphic but my son had the very top Transformers cake for his bday last year and it turned his poop blue for a week ! lol

(and the Optimus Prime toy broke right away)...


June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterG. Johnson

Somebody please tell me that there are some Michael Jackson wrecks floating around out there that we'll be seeing in the next few days.


June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJagyularr

Fronds? No way. The Teletubbies just learned how to make it straight instead of coiled.

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I'm ignorant of the Transformer's world. Which is fine by me.

Angie (from over at

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHalf Assed Kitchen

Honestly, if it wasn't for the ever-so helpful sign, I would have assumed those were Hot Wheels cakes......

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMalMal

Love the Finding Nemo reference!

And as I was one of the suckers who went and saw the midnight opening show, I can tell you that these wrecks are far more entertaining than the movie itself.

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAndre

Can we call this collection "More than SHOULD meet the eye"?

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterThe Brain

io9 has a bunch of nerdy cake toppers, including quite a few Transformers ones here: . I'm pretty sure the one of Optimus Prime and Smurfette qualifies as a wreck.

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSara Jo

Hahahahahaha "anenomes" hahaha... oh gosh I know its a bad joke, but it made me CRACK UP! :-) Thanks.

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLauren

Ha ha! I love the first one, it makes me think of the robes on "Manos, Hands of Fate"!!

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLaurenH

I thought that the pointy one looked more like the Cracken! Let's mix Transformers and Pirates of the Caribbean!

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSue KuKu

I've often said that being a JC Skipper is my dream job. You just gained a zillion cool points.

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMissCritta

I work in a supermarket bakery, and I can assure you, there's a new kit for the sequel.
Of course, Bakery Crafts doesn't have it listed on their site. Boo.
All it is is 2 tiny sculpted plastic figures and a plastic lay-on. The design... is gray gears on a slightly less gray background. It has great wreck-potential.

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBrittanica

Love the fronds/anemones crack! (Does it come on a t-shirt?) I nearly swallowed my gum trying not to laugh out loud in my cubicle at that one. You have my undivided daily vote at Blogluxe.


June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

These are beyond awful! You'd think the cake designer would come up with some kind of template so that the design could be easily replicated.

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

If you took the truck off that second one & added some tropical fish it would look like coral.

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDani

oh, dear. That is just... sad... all of them.

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMorgan the Muse

really? no MJ tribute today? come on, jump on the bandwagon.

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRachel

Agree with Brittanica- although we got silver airbrush paint. Silver. Wonder what that does to your poop.

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKbaker

Love the Finding Nemo quote!

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered Commenter*~*Lis*~*

Oh, my well...I guess in these examples, lazy decorators rule.

The one with the really pointy flames is well done except for all the junk on top, which I can't stand on any cake...unless it's fabricated by the decorator and it's all edible !

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLynn

Hey, I think we should be THANKING Publix for all of these special Wrecks. There's hardly a birthday party we attend these days that isn't made just a little bit happier with a Publix disaster. And even their website keeps in theme - only true Wreckerators can cross over to web design and misspell the word "Lightning" as "Lightening," and "Scooby Doo" as "Scooby Do," as you prepare to pony up your $50 online. What would we do without Publix?

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHeidi

You were a JC skipper! That's so awesome! It's also unsurprising with your ability to pun.

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterErin

Even something that simple gets borked. Amazing. How come these no-talent hacks have jobs while talented people languish unemployed?

VW: woringu

I'm woringu, do NOT order cakes from Wal-Mart.

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMiranda

Not a transformers fan, but the Finding Nemo refference made this whole post worth reading.

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMrs. B

YOU WERE A SKIP??? No wonder you rule....

It's a dream of mine... to introduce people to the legendary.... front side of rock :)

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered Commentermzmclean

I love going to grocery stores looking for wrecky cake! Even with plastic decorations things still seem to go horribly wrong...

I love your site!!!

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJillianCupcake

You were a JC Skipper? So was one of my best friends. She's working elsewhere for the mouse these days.

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKaren

Coming out from lurking to also chime in that "But with fronds like those, who needs anemones? Eh? Eh?" is pure awesomeness.

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJennifer

Ok, the fronds and anenomes joke was officially the funniest thing you've ever said. Clever doesn't cover it.

Speaking of which, that one is the only cake I wouldn't immediately send back to the bakery!

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterI Love Baby Quilts!

What is a JC skipper?

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Nice pun!

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLindalou

My son had this cake 2 years ago for his birthday and the store who made it (starts with a Wal and ends with a Mart) did a great job in my opinion...Considering....It was definitely better than the ones you just showed..LOL

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

So I've got to ask, on the sample cake are the flames Fondant/ They look to me like Fondant cut from a template.

Oh, and given the sell by date, I assume this is pro:

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterWookieeGunner

The Wreckorators certainly got "the touch"...of disaster. o.o
(Bahahha, G1 TF reference. SCORE.)

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The speckly description for the last one is perfect! I totally started laughing out loud because I couldn't have described it better myself!

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Dude, you were a JC skipper? That is truly awesome! Speaking of which, I've been reading the blog for a little while, and I haven't seen a post dedicated to Disney themed wrecks! Maybe I have to dig a bit deeper into the archives. But if not... there should be one :P

June 26, 2009 | Unregistered Commentermollymouse

PostPost a New Comment

Enter your information below to add a new comment.
Author Email (optional):
Author URL (optional):
Some HTML allowed: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <code> <em> <i> <strike> <strong>