My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen


For many wreckerators, no cake is more of a tongue-out, slightly-hunched-and-grunting impossibility than an animal cake. It's not for lack of trying, mind you. ("Squished Shih Tzu" is actually a bakery standard these days.) For all their trying and failing, though, there are times when the results are actually kind of cute. Kind of. In a mutant sort of way.

For example:

Now, the poodle is a ridiculous looking dog. You can tell by how ridiculous it looks. You would almost think it would be impossible to make it look any more ridiculous, but if so, the yolk's on you! Haha!

Or maybe on this guy.

Now this little fella... a chinchilla. I would very much like to snuggle him.

I don't really know what this is:

But I would also like to snuggle it. And maybe nom an ear.

This is a blow fish:

He obviously disapproves.

And this is a blow fish on antidepressants:

Any questions?

And if you think that bakers only try to make cutesy animals...

"What? I'm cutesy!"

...think again:

From the genus Crocodillius Seinfeldus.

Sometimes wreckorators double their efforts:

And, in some cases, they double their wreckage:

But at least this case also has some nice roses.

And finally, when an animal is really complicated:

"I'm complicated."

Wreckorators tend to just wing it:

"Meh. Hedgehog, hedge pig... same difference."

Thanks to Tim A., Stephanie D., Shirley L., Nathan M., JoeyJoJo and Monique R., who are all toy-gers. Toit toy-gers. Rawr.

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Reader Comments (104)

LOVE the manicure on Mr. Complicated!

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Hedgie hedgie hedgie hedgie what the HELL is THAT thing supposed to be???

Mrs. Tiggy-Winkle is crying.

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterViolaNut

The Blowfish is actually cute.....

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJenni Robinson

I like the chocolate ganache/almond pufferfish! He's kinda cute and happy that you're gonna EAT 'IM!

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterFerralyn

I'm with Jenni. I think the Blowfish cake is cute. But seriously a Hedgehog cake? Is there a pent up demand or something?

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJ.

Thank you for making my day special with a cutsey croc/gator, hedgepig, and blown-awayfish. You guys are AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!

wv:beryle: These aminals are beryle recognizable, but hilarious!

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Remember Q*Bert from the 80s arcade game? That's who that orange pig cake reminds me of.

If you don't remember Q*Bert, go here:*Bert&bav=on.1,or.&um=1&ie=UTF-8&source=og&sa=N&tab=wi&biw=1024&bih=581

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMs. Blasé

Those are some really wrecked cakes! But if a Croc wants me to think that he's cute and cuddly, well, I'm not going to argue too much with something that big!

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterdonkaloosa

Any questions?

Yes, I have a question about the blowfish cake. ARE THOSE FRENCH FRIES!?

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterZanthia

That blowfish is hysterical. And spot on with Seinfeldus!

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCantStopBaking

Is it wrong that the blow fish one makes me think of Seth Rogen?

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterbigbadteddy

"...and this is a blowfish on antidepressants."


February 18, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterscrapopotamos

The sign on the chinchilla actually says "coney bunny (cookies and cream)" not that anyone would guess rabbit from looking at it!

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I can almost hear the animaniacal laughter coming from those cakes. They're laughing I tell you. They're laughing.

Geez, the tongue on that poodle would make Gene Simmons jealous!

I'd nom an ear too, but snuggle? No.

LOL Disapproving blow fish shows disapproval! The other one? What is sticking out of it? Looks like those candy cigarette sticks...some "sharpened", some not....O.o

What is up with crocodiles getting such a bad rap? We're friendly...we smile...we've got feelings....

Why does the dog have *green stuff* on it? Why are its whiskers above its nose? Why does the "pig" look more like a blow fish? Looks like he's blowing real hard too.

Now there's a pig/hog...with...painted...nails...oh, and lipstick...that match the color of its eyes...ewww!

LOL, my late grandma would have pronounced that "tagger".

wv: bensubst: The wreckerators bensubst[ituting] these cakes for real animals.

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLoo-E Loo-I

Wow, I'm really digging the salsa-red nails on that last wreck. "I may be a mutant animal, but I'm a fashionable mutant animal."

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJennifer Armintrout

OK, I'm all on board with the cute blowfish comments, but WTH did they use for the spikes? I thought it was skewers, but they're not uniform enough... maybe slivered almonds?

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJenniffer

Where DO you find these photos?! Super funny, I want a bite of the creepy poodle head!!

Almonds, people. The spikes on the pufferfish are almonds (and I'd bet it's supposed to be a porcupine cake).

Jen and John, if you venture far enough from the cake side of the bakery you may encounter some French-bread alligators. Just sayin'. The ones I've seen have been much better looking than this cake.

Lastly, do I detect a sly Goldmember reference? Points!

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Poodles are actually very smart, friendly, good-natured dogs. I didn't realize this until my grandmother got one, because I was fooled by those topiary things people do to them. But remember, poodles do not choose their own hairstyles.

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterGary

I actually like the blowfish, even though it looks more like a porcupine.

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMarie

@Zanthia: I think they are almond slices. I like him.

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJessica

I love poodles :(
I love cake wrecks :)
the poodle cake wreck kinda scares me.

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterit's the hippy undertones

Hey Don't criticize the poodle. They're smart (mostly smarter than the other dog breed you posted and yes I know I've worked with both). That cut has a purpose!

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterwagrobanite

How can you tell what these are supposed to be?

PS: I love, love, lurve the blowfish cake.

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

It's the Awesome Smiley in black!

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterClassic Steve


Poodles are brilliant, awesome dogs.

They just look silly.

It's not their fault.


February 18, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterjohn (the hubby of Jen)

Love the hedgehogs painted nails...not that one has class!

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAngela

My questions is, Who orders a Blow Fish Cake to begin with?

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterTina, Escrow Goddess

Soooo.... I really LIKE the blowfish cake. It makes me smile.

The others? Not so much.

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda Mac

Not a hedgehog cake.
A PORKupine one :)

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered Commentersitronella

We once had a pufferfish and he smiled all the time. He loved people and would come swimming over whenever anyone went past the fishtank.

He would have loved that cake!

As for the hedgehog cake, I guess it really looks like a hog hiding in the hedges. A real hedgehog is just too cute for it's name.

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Thank you to Gary.
I had a poodle when I was growing up and he NEVER had one of those crazy haircuts (yeah I know they have historic hunting significance.)
He was the smartest dog we ever had and often complained about his breed being the brunt of so many jokes.

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I like the blowfish cake too.
I wasn't going to comment but my word verification is 'scones', which as I sit here in jolly old England is quite funny. Fancy a cuppa anyone?

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCaroline B


Seriously, what is the purpose of of this cut? Please don't think I am being sarcastic, but I would like to know why poodles are trimmed in a way that makes them look so .....odd.

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

for just a second there I was afraid my own blowfish cake was going to be up there... but phew - the blown blog with the fries jabbed into it is even worse than my pathetic amateur effort :)

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterT

I adore the chocolate and almond Happy Blowfish cake.
Thanks for the sly Austin Powers reference too, it made my day!

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterChristine

Glad I'm not the only one who saw french fries instead of slivered almonds on the happy blowfish! And the sign by him does say porcupine, but are we really going to trust the wreckerator to know the difference?

The manicured one reminds me of the mini poodle my friend had; her mom would always have its nails painted at the groomer. It was weird on a real dog and even worse on a cake creature.

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLeftWingLock

awww, I think the blowfish is cute!

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSanni

When I saw the "pig," I said out loud, "Oh my gosh, that's supposed to be a PIG?!?"

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

"Blow fish on antidepressants" - Thanks for the pick-me-up. I laughed out nurse (I'm in the hospital right now) gave me quite a funny look.

NowTHIS is the way to eat a blow chance of a dying a horrible death. ;o)

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKatiMomKat

To anonymous 10:02am,

Coney Bunny should be "Cony Bunny" as it is really a pika, a bunny cousin sometimes called a cony. Gotta forgive the Chinchilla mistake there, as that's a pretty close, based on looks.

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

When I read the title of this post as "Animaniacs", I started singing the theme song. Then I read further down and was more than a little sad that it did not involve Yakko, Wakko, or Dot.

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterStogoe

Actually the hedgehog cake would be pretty good if it didn't have that silly pig face on it.

WV: andst

The Wreckenators caused me a lot of andst.

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterOldish Lady

Why is the poodle balancing a deviled egg on its head? I've heard of some odd cake filling in my day, but this one takes the...oh, nevermind

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLynn

Aww the last one is kinda cute!

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJillian

Eh, hedgeHOG or PORKupine, they both look swine to me.

Sorry. Hungry. And there's a pork teriyaki takeout calling my name from down the street.

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered Commentermsyendor

I love the Happy Blowfish! I'll have whatever he's having... and maybe a little of him too.

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterGin

THIS is how to make a poodle cake -- from Food Netwwork Challenge's "Best of Show" competition. Yes, that's cake -- fluffed with spun sugar. And in eight hours by two pweople, no less.

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterkayk

Bahahahaha genus Crocodillius Seinfeldus! Awesome!

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLaura

I love the blowfish! I think it's cute LOL.

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterGianna

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