My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Fire Two!

Think that last wreck was bad?

Well, it was.

Really, REALLY bad.

But now it's time to turn up the heat and fire off a few more fire wrecks. Oh yeah. FEEL THE BURN!

Burn, amoeba, burn.


Finger-licking flames? NOW we're cooking!



But seriously, that's awful.


And speaking of "finger-licking," I think this campfire took the term a little too literally:

The Cheez Whiz isn't helping.



Or possibly Bob.


Harley Davidson has always been known for its "tough guy" image.

That and leather halter tops. (For the last time, John: NOT a good look for you.)

Oh, and also french fries.

Lots of french fries.

Born to be deep fried and salted.


Now, close your eyes. Give me your hand. Darling. Am I...only dreaming? Or is...this...burning...AN ETERNAL FLAME??

No? Oh.

Well alright then.


A toast to Brandi V., Quinn S., Tracey, Holly F., April Z., and Jackie M. for the flame wars.

And also to Basic Instructions for a little inspiration.


« It's Baaaa-aaaack | Main | FIBER!! »

Reader Comments (49)

You light up my life when you do two posts in a day. You warm my heart. You put a fire in my belly to post.

Thanks for turning the heat up today!

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterTricia

That first one is for the debut of the new SyFy movie, "Sons of Anarchy Meet The Blob".

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBADKarma

Did someone just grab bottles of ketchup and mustard and let loose all over that last one? I find it difficult to find a connection between happy confetti and roaring flames, unless they wanted to burn down the entire party...

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered Commentersteelfeather

If the fiery bowels of dysentery could be a cake, it would be Cheez Whiz cake #3. And the added fiber from those plastic pine branches is a total bonus.

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterZizi

The first cake is a scene from the yet-to-be-released remake of “Fantastic Voyage,” only this time they miniaturize a motorcycle with a camera on it and send it into a set of intestines to see what’s cooking…ah, cooked…ah, what’s wrong. The last cake is called “Hey, I’ve got some frosting left in these bags – anyone wanna squeeze something out?”

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered Commentermel

I am questioning what those "rocks" around the "campfire" are made from. They look sort of like potatoes. Very small, discolored, spuds.

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterHope

This post is giving me hot flashes.

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJ.

Eww!!!! The forest one is beyond gross!! The last one is mind-boggling - they actually put that out on the shelf & expected someone to come along & say "Hey, that's just what I was looking for!!"???

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered Commenteranony mouse

burnt amoeba, puppet sock, Cheez Whiz with a chocolate rock,
Harley fries, look out Bob!, flaming icing fire blob,

We didn't start the fire
It was always burning
Since the world's been turning...

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterzoomom

Ketchup and mustard! My favorite cake topping! Mmmmmm!

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterPee Jay

In the second cake the beard of Davy Jones is on fire and trying to reach for the bucket of water to put himself out.

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterIsolder74

The harley-davidson cake looks <slightly=""> like yellow sour gummy worms with ketchup

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterfim chizzle/ratmallow

I heard about this happening to a buddy of mine when he was in the Navy and the boat docked in Thailand. I think there is a shot for that now.

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterRixie

zoomom, now I want John and #1 to sing your version of the song...

(Mostly random non sequitur: After "What's This?" I pictured #1 as Claudia from Warehouse 13...and now when I watch Warehouse 13, I hear "What's This?" in my head.)

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMelindaB

@zoomom: Your comment? Full. Of. Win.

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMelonie

The last one is supposed to be fire? Looks like someone let their kid have fun squeezing out an icing bag!

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterTrekkie Gal

Nothing like ketchup and mustard diarrhea to make my day!

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJeni

The second one looks like it is reaching out to pinch you on the (ahem) buttocks.

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterChristine

"I've seen fire, I've seen pain..."

#1 "Someday girl I don't know when were gonna get to that place / Where we really want to go and we'll walk on the sun / But till then tramps like us baby we were born to run..."

#2 Yes, nothing says 'Happy Birthday' like the Grasping Tentacles of Doom From Heck.

#3 Only you can stop...whatever in the world this is supposed to be. Are those brownies?! Tell me this wasn't visited upon innocent brownies. Someone needs to make a full confection -- give 'em the third degree!

#4 Happy Birthday, guy-surrounded-by-flames! No meta-messages here, no siree...Bob.

#5 Those aren't just any fries, those are chili-cheese fries. Dang it, knew I shouldn't have skipped lunch.

#6 My condiments to the chef.

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

Thank you, Zoomom.
Just thank you.

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

Truly, when I saw the thumbnail of the Harley fries on FB, I asked myself "why is Cake Wrecks showing a sheet tray of bacon"

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered Commentermpmarus

"Why is Cake Wrecks showing a sheet tray of bacon?" The sheer awesomeness of bacon is its own reason.

Basic Instructions is awesome, too. I was turned on to that when I first read about the Fireman Cake.

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

Why am I craving bacon?

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJessicaS

They were ordered by us . . . let's give them Baaaaaack!
How can we sleep while the cakes are burning? How can we sleep while our wrecks are burning?

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterTXRed

The rocks for the 'cheesewhiz' fire are a type pf candy. The Logs, however, caused me to triple take. I found the very same things in the litter box, yesterday. I seriously had my stomach turn over.
OH, The 'Finger-licking' tenticals...umm...memories of watching that anime classic "Legend of the Overfiend". (Which if you have never seen or heard of, count youself LUCKY)
Todays post has left me very, very disturbed. *SHUDDER*

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMommaL

Did they just close their eyes and squeeze on the last one? There is not rhyme or reason to it! Especially considering if it was to have been flames, why are there brightly colored dot sprinkle things on it and other multicolored squiggles?
These posts always brighten my day, and now my afternoon as well!

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDawn Marie

I want to know the name of the Harley-D Kid. Is that Gamlett or Gawlett or maybe Gawhett?

Tasty kitchen tip of the day: Out of red and yellow icing for that firery cake design you are contemplating? Use ketchup and mustard. Surprise your friends, delight your children. Everyone will want to know, "Who decorated this cake?"

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnnie in Texas

Zoomom is awesome!

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKathy

Zoomom & Craig- you win the interwebs!!

(John (thoJ), you'd do well to shave your back first.)

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBarbara Anne


August 22, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterTINY P ELEPHANT

So, um, that second cake there... Anyone else see it as a veiled threat to the cheery banality of a traditional western family celebration? Because it leaves me with the distinct impression that (cue drum roll and ominous music) Cthulhu does not LIKE happy birthdays.

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterStriderGirl

Even I know I can botch a drawing of fire, but at least I know not to put the botched drawing on public display. The second cake looks like an attempt at egyptian hyrogliphic paintings f hands, and the third cake does not look eadible, let alone sanitary. I think I'll stick to a basic cake and whoever I buy it for can live with it.

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered Commentershikiblade

Why did the builders of the campfire use fingers as a combustible. Surely they know that the nails only send out stinky fumes. I mean ... everyone knows that don't they?

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterOtter

The last one looks like the baker was just either really bored....or had a complete lack of imagination...

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDina

Zoomom: you just made my night. You are officially awesome! :D

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterloligon

Oh my goodness! I just found this blog and have been laughing for hours! My roommates had to check on me a few times to make sure I was still breathing in between my bouts of laughter and crying. I recently got a job as a cake decorator and I think that just makes this site all the better. If I had seen some of these cakes before I would wonder how someone would actually attempt to sell something so disastrous. After working at a bakery, I wonder how any good looking cakes get produced. Keep up the great work! I am loving this ab workout from laughing.

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBrett

zoomom, you are awesome!

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSue

Zoomom = brilliant!

August 22, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterbeth

Gross that third cake looks like a bunch of flaming poo. Something tells me the wreckerators of these cakes are quite obsessed with cakes and fire lol. Although setting these wrecks on fire just might be a good idea before the customer sees them.

August 23, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

Do I get geek points for knowing the lyrics you left off of the last cake post? Or does it just mean I am an 80's child and I am doomed for life?

August 23, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMeg

Zoomom rocks - I'm going to be singing that all day now.

The amoeba one - does anyone else see a hand on each side flipping the bird? I wonder what the customer said to upset the baker that badly?

August 23, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSquirrel

Is the campfire cake already cut? It looks like it was sliced, THEN decorated. (?)

August 23, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnon

Those aren't french fries... they're Cheetos! I don't know why they're on a cake, though...

August 23, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterbuffy

So, I hate when people want me to put flames on a cake because I know it will look bad...
But not THIS bad geesh.

August 23, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJennifer

Wasn't that second one in a Futurama special episode?

August 23, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKimberly Chapman

OH! so that last post was FIRE! I never would have figured that out on my own...

August 23, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCourtney

YEA! Someone else make fun of Fire at Will! Our family joke is whenever you hear "Fire at Will" you should respond "Poor Will". Honestly how does anyone know which person is Will?

August 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterHeather

I hate the harley deco set kit with a passion, I work at a supermarket & had to decorate one over the weekend. The kit itself is pretty ugly anyway, but that decorator found a way to make it even worse, ughhhhh

August 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterErin

I work at a walmart bakery....I would never send out something like that. It doesn't matter if it's just for the case or an order, what are these decorators thinking?

April 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterArieana

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