My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Turkey Countdown

Ok, people, T-Day is in exactly one week! So let's sound off.


Turkey Roach?



Turkey Snake?



Turkey Bride-of-Frankenstein?

"Here - but to be frank, this hair is a little out of season."


Turkey Ball?

"I prefer Butter Ball."


Turkey Flaming Football?

"My ball. My ball. My ball is on FI-YUR!"


Turkey Groins?

"First one to make a 'stuffing' joke gets his wattle torn off."


Turkey Face?

"I am not a human being! I AM AN ANIMAAAL!"


Aaaaand last but not least... Turkey Poo-Wang?



Ok, look's like we're all here! So let's get out there, peeps, and make this a Turkey Day they'll never forget.


Thanks to Cara B., Edward G., Robert S., Hannah W., Julie M., Lori C., Hannah W., & Crystal E. for reminding us to be thankful... for pumpkin pie.

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Reader Comments (49)

The smirking corn!!!

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKate

Umm, I think I'd like to forget it, thank you...

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

Sung to "Who Are the People in your Neighborhood?

Oh, who are the turkeys in your bakery case?
In your bakery case
In your bake-ry case?
Oh, who are the turkeys in your bakery case?
The turkeys that you'll see today.

Turkey Roach scuttles around the case
Turkey Snake will strike you in the face
Franky's bride will blankly stare at you.
While Butter Ball goes rolling through.

Flaming balls will make a turkey dance
Turkey groins should really put on pants
Turkey Face will make a point or two
And Poo Wang isn't good for you.

Yes, these are the turkeys in your bakery case
Aren't they a disgrace?
Turkey toxic waste
Yes, these are the turkeys in your bakery case
This year I think pie sounds OK.

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

Is Turkey Face wearing his legs as a muffler?! CREEPY.

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterDelphine

"Oh, Mr.Gingerbread!! Is that a turkey in your pants, or are you just happy to see me?" *blush*
@Sharyn: "Poo Wang" really cracked me up! (I was going to say that it got a rise out of me, but I'm not equipped that way!) =^~.-^=

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

I lost it at Turkey Roach. Lol.

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda

I'm completely left aghast that someone would think it's a good idea to pipe turkey heads on the groins of gingerbread men. *shaking head*

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterDrockbox

This (turkey) roach is on fiiiii-re! (With apologies to Alicia Keys)

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAngela

Is the caption on the second-to-last one a reference to a Mitch Hedberg joke? If so, I love this blog even more now. :)

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered Commentermelanie sparkles

Yup, it is pie for me, too, this year. How unscrumptious these cakes and cookies are!

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAlison

The 6th cake – actually cookies: Not the fullest decorating bag the bakery and caught up in the Thanksgiving decorating frenzy, Ralph was a bit confused when his colleague said “I dare you to put some peckers on those gingerbread men.”

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLittle Boy Blue

The Face of Bo goes seasonal.

The masses flee in terror.

...And there was great rejoicing...

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBADKarma

My god, and to think of all the unemployed people out there...they could set up bake shops if this is the standard D:. Sharyn HAHAHAHAHAHA :D

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

unfamiliar shapes
thanksgiving bird massacre
o turkeys most foul
bird brains make holiday cakes
and customers weep inside

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered Commentertanka

POO WANG! Bahahahaaa!

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterColleen

Peach Pie, Pecan Pie, Pumpkin Pie, umm... Pineapple Pie? Anything would be better than a Turkey Roach ::shudder::

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJodee


Sign me up too for the pie Alison.

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJodi

I personally think the turkey groins are jealous of the gingerbread guy with the ear of corn groin...

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered Commentermiss_paper

My ball, my ball, my ball is on fire!
We don't need no icing let the motherclucker burn!

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterXena

Is it me or did none of these decorators use the plastic eyes correctly? Flip over put nose in the loop so it doesn't show. Seems simple...oops right wreckorators not decorators.

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterPuddyKat

While the turkey penises (penisi? Peni?) are great, I was rather um...impressed by the ear of corn penis that the other gingerbread man was sporting! Wowza! As my dad would always say, "anyone want to have a corn on the cob eating contest? But you have to start from the top and work your way down!" Yeah...he's kind of a dirty old man. Lol!

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered Commentershannon

I want to unlearn the term "poo wang".

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterRobin

Thanksgiving just wouldn't be complete without a Turkey Poo-Wang. Thanks!

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterzoomom

Yet another post that makes me wonder how a wreckerator can see a photo of something -- in this case, a turkey -- decorate the cake, compare the two and say: "NAILED IT!!!!! WOO-HOO!!!!!"

And even more baffling: why anyone would attempt any sort of turkey decoration on a gingerbread MAN.

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterTLC

"Oh, we have some gingerbread cookies left over from last year!"
"What do we do with them?"
"Why, we put turkeys and corn on them, of course! NOBODY WILL EVER NOTICE."

...just... HOW. How are these bakers so cra-z?!

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered Commenter-Unknown-

...I didn't think "Turkey groin" when I saw the cookies... I wanted to know what Gingerbread Man was doing back there. The farmer and sheep image flashed for a second. I'm off to look for a therapist.

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterPaloma

Ok, I'm still stuck on the Turkey Penis cookies. They look like they're stacked up. How does that even work without the frosting getting all smeared and stuck the back of the cookie on the top?

OOooooo... so many horrible thoughts just went through my head and NONE of them are safe for work! O.O

@Shannon, I blame you. Or maybe your dad.

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJodee

Is it just me, or does the turkey ball have tassel pasties on it's turkey breasts?

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterRobin

The "sup" caption on the last one just about killed me....

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBonnie B.

Oh my that last two are terrifying. That are the oddest gingerbread men ever.

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBarbara

I still don't understand how professional bakers can't manage to make a turkey cake. I know it isn't that hard I've done is myself several times!

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterIsolder74

Hmmm...I just doesn't look like a corn penis, it looks like Gingy is getting lucky with an ear of corn.

@Little Boy Blue, you made my day with the pecker comment!!

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJodi

*sniff!* It's my favorite time of the year. The wreckerators never disappoint!

This past weekend I was at a cupcake decorating class and since it was themed to the time of year, we learned how to make turkeys. As I was piping the brown icing, all I kept thinking was "don't make it look like poo!!"

Two out of three's not bad, right? :-/

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterlisadh

If that corn groin thing is all frosting, I am so down.
Also Poo-Wang looks like he would hit on anything with boobs, but in that creepy smooth way.

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKelly S

I'm with Paloma. Exactly what is Gingerbread Man doing to to those turkeys?

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterStevenHB

@TLC - There's you're mistake; you assume they have seen at least a picture of a turkey! Personally, I think these cakes look like they were made with longing, by a person who really longed to see a turkey.

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterzoomom

EGADS-what a bunch of dirty-minded PERVERTS we have here!! Y'all are completely disgusting, filthy, and reprehensible! I LIKE that in people! Carry on! =^-.-^=

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

The jokes write themselves. The last one looks like it might be related to Sweetums.

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterE. Anne

Poo wang is now my favorite, move over asshats!

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKathie

@Jodee: i read the first paragraph of your comment and laughed so hard I started snorking. And I thought EXACTLY what you said in the second paragraph even before I saw it!

Great dirty minds think alike!

E. Anne is right. On this post, the jokes writ themselves. . . . . .

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterTLC

The baker who made the second wreck did a pretty good job on the tail feathers.

November 21, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLiv

Between the Eat Beef on #2, the wattle-threatening phallic gingerbread men, the poo wang, and shannon's dad (I think I'm in love!), I need a cigarette!

November 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterZippy

I agree with Liv, the tail on turkey snake is alright -- but I don't think they've ever seen a turkey face... Where is the beak? It kind of looks like poo wang's bloodied cousin.

November 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterDeerfeather

Well poo wang now has me laughing hysterically. Wow. I cannot believe the wreckerators cannot see what they have caused. Much laughter and no eating of cake on this Thanksgiving that's for sure lol.

November 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

First time EVER I have laughed out loud at your posts. Chuckled? yes. Giggled, yup. But never out loud till today! hahahaha

November 22, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterkiki

First time EVER I have laughed out loud at your posts. Chuckled? yes. Giggled, yup. But never out loud till today! hahahaha

November 22, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterkiki

@zoomom, Great Firefly reference! Ha ha! I was thinking the exact same thing. :)

November 22, 2013 | Unregistered Commentersandy

#2: turkey-snake says "eat beef"...? it's "eat ham"....ham<\i> is the alternative thanksgiving meat, not beef! derp!
#6: I get the turkeys (sort of) but "corn on the crotch"? please, no. why did the wrecker have to drag an innocent vegetable into that horrible display shelf?

the "poo wang": O_o Oh dear God...what is that white...blob...doing there....?

November 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterNerfbomb

"As God is my witness, I thought turkeys could fly" WKRP in Cincinatti

December 6, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterxanne

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