My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Away In A Bakery

With all the hustle and bustle at this time of year, it's important to remember the real reason for the Christmas season:

Wait. That doesn't seem right...




To be fair, if you sound that out you get "Juices."

So there's that.


Now I'm getting confused.


Chusl, I don't even know anymore.


Thanks to Barbara P., Stacy N., Nicole K., Amanda D., & Amy A. for having the presents of mind to take these pictures.

« Oh Tannen Bums | Main | Rising to the Occasion »

Reader Comments (35)

Juses loves me, this I know,
For the cake wrecks tell me so.
Merry Chidmas just seems wrong,
But it makes a nifty song.

Yes, Jessuse loves me.
Yes, Juses loves me.
Yo, Jessus loves me.
The cake wrecks tell me so.

December 18, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

This only seems fair after all the Hanukkah spelling wrecks.

@SuBee, too funny!

December 18, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterZippy

I will now be signing, "Away in a Bakery" in my head all day. Thank you for that.

December 18, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJennifer

I shall spend the remainder of this holiday season telling people "Merry Chudmas"!!

December 18, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterCathy

Bwah Subee and Jennifer!

I feel a tad bit of sympathy for that last wreckerator because that is what happens to me when I write with a pen. My brain seems to go too fast for my hand and when I look back at what I've written, letters are left out and others are very badly formed. Then again...I'm not a professional cake decorator who gets paid to make things look nice, so maybe I have NO sympathy for this wreckerator!

In honor of Haiku Joy:

Sacreligious cakes
How sad it is to misspell
The name of our Lord!

December 18, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJodi

@SuBee -- LOL
And thanks, CW Team!

December 18, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMaureen

Some Random Thoughts…..

• There was much merriment at the annual “My Name Sounds Like Jesus Birthday Bash”….

• Once word got out in Bethlehem that the “good” name was taken….

• Made by bakers from the failed “No Bakers Left Behind” school of decorating….

• So…like others can’t have a December birthday…?

• Often imitated…never duplicated….

• Winners from the “It Sounds Like Cursing But It’s Not” contest…

@SuBee: wonderful, absolutely wonderful!!!

December 18, 2013 | Unregistered Commentermel

Okay, so what is the correct plural of "Jesus"?

December 18, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJoel Polowin

@Joel Polowin-During Mardi Gras I believe we determined that the plural of Jesus is Jususses and that many groups of Jesuses is Jesusseses.
For example:There are two Jesusses in my math class this year. They are all involved in the schools chapter of Jesusseses for Jews.

December 18, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

@Joel Polowin ~ Ummm... Still Jesus I believe. Although autocorrect says Jesus's and Jesus' pass the test. However, Juses and Jessusi do not.

SuBee ~ You can pinch hit for @Sharyn anytime! Nicely done my friend!

The red frosting poinsettias on the Happy Birthday Jessus make my tummy hurt. And made me check my teeth for stains.

December 18, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJodee

@mel --

"the failed 'No Bakers Left Behind' school of decorating" <snort>

December 18, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterDee, just Dee

And they came to him, asking, "Where is he that is born King of the Juses," and he answereth them, "Yes."

December 18, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterkhereva

I don't know either. It just boggles the mind.

December 18, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterGinger

Joel, unless you are in a Mexican school, there really isn't any plural. Les Jesus, maybe? Even the possessive doesn't have any "tags" on it. "Jesus' death and passion." (Sorry. Went into Preacher's kid mode there.)

December 18, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLady Anne

Rhymes with "masseuse."

December 18, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJenni

As long as the variations of Juses and Jusses et al don't come in riding on their own personal Ru-Wangs...I think we 'may' just manage through this one without too much of an incident! LOL

December 18, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLise

@Jodee and others:
Jesus: singular
Jesus' or Jesus's: possessive (choose your preferred style)
Jesuses: plural

Jesus told me the Coalition of Jesuses would be celebrating Jesus' birthday on the 22nd this year.

December 18, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterR3Test

Well, they went 4 for 4 on "Birthday', so it's a start.

December 18, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterjackwire

@Suebee hahahahahahaha :D the cakes make Jesus weep :_;

December 18, 2013 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

Oh Jeebus, those cakes are terrible.

December 18, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterThe Former CB

Did they mean Jose? Cuz it's not my birthday.

December 18, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJose

Jeez! I mean, Juuz! Stop being intolerant and showing your lack of multiculturalism! Juses a common name in Spanish-speaking countries and it's pronounced "hoo-sase." I learned that from my substitute Spanish teacher Peggy Hill.

@Jose: no way!

December 18, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterpikkewyntjie

I',pretty sure Juses is pronounced "Who says?"

December 18, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLawlady

Away in a bakery, with frosting of red,
They tried to write "Jesus," but flubbed it instead.
The bakers tried writing again and again,
First "Juses" then "Jessus," on why ain't he "Ben??"

The customer's waiting, the poor baker shakes,
But to pipe a "Jesus," more tries will it take!
Will flotsam disguse one last futile try?
They ran out of red; on to green "Jessusi."

Oh! Oh! Oh! Merry Chuslxras!!!

December 18, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterZippy

@Dee, just Dee: I took a decorating course once...I was left behind.... :-)

December 18, 2013 | Unregistered Commentermel

This is what happens when you stop allowing Christmas in public schools...and/or when you hire dyslexic chimpanzees to decorate cakes for you.

December 18, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterNerfbomb

Is "Chusl" a relative of Cthulhu?

December 18, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterFear-ciuil

I saw your facebook post of the first cake and I had no idea what it meant. "Tuses" is an unusual name for sure, but I couldn't figure out what was spelled wrong on the cake!

Maybe a cake like this is the reason for the shortest verse in the Bible:
"Jesus wept."

December 18, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterTricia

@ Lawlady: "Who says?" For the Win! Nicely done! :)

December 18, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterTricia

Ah the joys of looking at these wrecks and dying of laughter trying to pronounce what they attempted to spell lol. I have a feeling they just sound it out as they go and hope for the best.

December 19, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

The plural of Jesus is obviously Jesi.

December 19, 2013 | Unregistered Commenternanalettie

@khereva: hahaahahahaahahaa!

December 19, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterDegera

Merry Chudmas!

December 19, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSusanna K.

Jessuse: n. 1. Preacher 2. Someone who massages the word of the Lord.

December 19, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterRJ

Away in a bakery no room for right speling
The little cake jussuse, cringing he will cause.
The weird yellow frosting poinsettias are sad,
Merry chridmas to aall and all and all a good night!!

Sry. Me no-so-good at writing. >.<

April 4, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterMary

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