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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

5 Bakers Who Bit Off More Than They Could Chew

My friends, cake decorating can be hard. Why do you think we have so much material? But bakers can make their jobs a lot easier by just knowing their limitations.

For instance, bakers, say someone asks you to make a groom's cake that looks like their BMW:

...but you're just figuring out what "edible markers" are.


In that case, maybe say no.

See how much better that would have been?


Ok, now let's practice together! I'll play the customer.

Hi! Can you make me a cake that looks like this shoe?


Now you say, "No. No, I can't."


I'd really love Maleficent on a cake! Can you do that?


"No. No, I can't."


Aw, then how about Tinkerbell?


"Sure! No probl... I mean, no. No, I can't."



See how easy that is? And hey, being able to say no to orders you can't do will give you more time for the ones you can!

Or you could just fill the donuts.


Thanks to Lesley H., Molly H., Sheyla S., John A., & Michelle R., who advises steering clear of the Stay Puft donuts, since we all know where THAT leads.


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Reader Comments (38)

It's precious to me that the Superman baker couldn't even get the colors correct. If you're gonna make a backward S that looks nothing like the logo at least make it red! I love my morning Cake Wreck laugh!

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterAnne

The level of wreckiness of cake #1 is dependent on who chose to put Barbie and Ken next to it. Sometimes we get the wreck we deserve.

Maleficent is 55 years old and Tinkerbell is 61! In fact, they might be wearing shoes that actually look like cake #2 by now. Give them a break. Not everyone can afford Renee Zellweger's surgeons.

Now for Beckham. He will never be able to play football the way David Beckham does. He will most likely never have the body David Beckham does....................... (sorry, where was I?) But he will grow up with the knowledge that, no matter what, he will always be able to make a Superman B-day cake better than the person who made this cookie. You go, little Beckham.

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

One of these things is not like the other
One of these things just doesn't belong
Can you refund all the customers' money
By the time we finish this song?

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

Poor Tink looks like she has been eating the cake...

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered Commentermiss_paper

Who threw Barbie under the Beemer?

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterShirley Fowley

For years a fairy queen I've been
For years I foiled the Demon King
But alas I'm getting on the years have flown somehow
And I feel that Fairy Snowdrop isn't wanted now

Nobody loves a fairy when she's forty
Nobody loves a fairy when she's old

She may still have a magic power but that is not enough
They like their bit of magic from a younger bit of stuff
When once your silver star has lost its glitter
And your tinsel looks like rust instead of gold
Fairy days are ending when your wand has started bending
No-one loves a fairy when shes old

So time to lay off the pies, Tink!

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterCaroline B

Still trying to figure out the shoe cake thing. What's behind it? Another cake or part of the same cake? Neither of them look like a shoe, but who wants to eat a shoe anyway?
Except maybe this guy:

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterFM

The car cake really isn't all that bad. And they didn't do all that badly with the second one; that *is* a complicated sneaker. I'd pay for them both without batting an eye, myself.

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterBea


October 27, 2014 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

Looks like they stopped at

Fancy footwear
Can you make?
Yes, but this is
Not that cake….

Causing mischief, evil, the definition be,
Fits this baker to a T.

Tinker Bell?
I fear it’s a trap….
Whatever you do,
Don’t clap! Don’t clap!!

A gift from Superman’s elder aunts,
A pair of reversible underpants….

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered Commentermel

That Malficent cake looks " Muy Mal" ( very bad) and that Tinkerbell cake....YEEEEK!!!!

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterBigg3469

Oh, Sharyn-*giggle*-if I were the customer, I couldn't guarantee that I'd wait even that long!
The "Tinkerbell" cake isn't at all that bad (cough)... So, she's put on a FEW pounds! More servings for the party-goers! And so WHAT if her wings look as if a mammoth marble gravestone has fallen onto her back? Tink doesn't NEED wings; she has her pixie dust. Who wants to make something of it that her missing foot ended up on her right wrist?! Nobody's perfect. But someone should probably take the pixie dust away from that least while he/she is *working*. Ya think? =^~.-^=

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

Did somebody call Stuporman?

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterClassic Steve

As long as these wreckerators FILL the donuts and don't try to decorate them, we should be OK.

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterTLC

Maybe I've just seen too many wedding wrecks, but I didn't think the car one was bad.

As for Tinkerbell, I'm more concerned that her feet seem to have fused into a single golf-ball sized node. 0.O

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterChaosTheory

If you squint and turn your head sideways, that last one *almost* looks like the original Superman symbol from the 30s... But not enough.

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterCarol

Edible paper is looking better every day, isn't it?

Meanwhile the car isn't that bad. Except that it looks like it is stuck in a mudslide. But it at least looks like a car. Maybe not his car, but definitely a car.

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterTricia L

@FM I think, but am definitely not sure, that the other cake is a shoe box.

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterCarol

Tinkerbell's legs seem to have turned into bananas. Did someone cast a nasty spell on poor Tink?

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterRenee

He bent the "S" like Beckham!

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterChris

At some level, I'd hope the decorator would just KNOW that they don't have an artistic bone in his/her body, just print out the design on edible paper then trace over it with icing ... that would HAVE to look better than some of the freehand attempts

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJDub

The Malificent cake - yikes, yikes, yikes. o_O That is all...

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterStephanie

There used to be a joke in the UK that many people drove BMWs - that's British Made Wrecks - unfortunately most of these appear to be USAMWs

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered Commentertoonfan69

Actually, #3 is a pretty darn good likeness of an angry Minnie Driver!

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterKrista

Did they just like color that BMW's windows with a runny out felt tip pen?

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterBecca

Well looks like one cookie decorator is trying to make a golden age Bizzarro a thing.

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterIsolder74

On a minor note, I've done car cakes many time. It is at least good that this one still looks like a car. It can be hard to get a cake to be the right shape but from experience I do know how to remove small bits of cake until I get the right forms. I've made a 57 Chevy, a 74 Corvette and a Mini before. The cakes I am the most proud of are my fire trucks that I make for the firefighters from my are both on anniversaries of 9/11. When it comes to making a car cake I've found that the best scale is to use ding dongs as the wheels and work out the cake size based on the car from there.

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterIsolder74

Definitely not Barbie's dream car! Also, maybe the Tinkerbell is actually Tonkerbell from SNL.

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterLuLu

That may not be much of a Tinkerbell, but it's a pretty darn good Joan Blondell.

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterChakolate

that tinkerbell cake is perfect for a fat tinker bell....that's what i'd look like on halloween LOL

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered Commenterladymolli

Obviously, the last decorator decided to go with Bizarro's insignia instead of Superman's.

And that Tinkerbell cake looks so dumpy and frumpy, they must have used Lena Dunham as the model.

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterPurpleRanger

I'm sorry, if you aren't good at free-hand drawing, there is just NO EXCUSE for messing up. You print out a picture of the thing you need to draw, poke holes along the outlines, put it on the cake, and dust a little cocoa powder, which will fall through the holes and give you a lovely way to connect the dots and "free-hand" a great representation.

I am HORRIBLE at drawing, and have never free-handed a picture in frosting in my life, but I used the above technique to make my daughter a Tinkerbell cake and it came out really awesome, especially for an amateur. There's just no excuse.

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterLisa S.

Goodbye, Bizzaro Baker am say Yes! To make Superman Cake. Make cookie instead. Hello.

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJason

At least the car is recognizable. Without the helpful interpretive assistance, I'm not sure I would have known that was a shoe. :-)

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterGinger

Pretty sure that's what I would look like if I wore a Tinkerbell costume. o.O

Today marks the 5nd day of computer/internet/server/phone issues at the office. Hey, at least the Xerox machine is working (ish) and I haven't had to sticker any illegally parked cars yet.

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJodee

@mel - That last verse made me laugh out loud! =)

As for the cakes, the car is almost cute in a cartoonish sort of way - it might have been a hot at a kid's party. But at a wedding, not so much.

Both shoes - the real and the cake - look like they lost a duel with a pink-ink squirting octopus. But then again, I remember the fluorescent orange pair of kangaroo shoes (remember those, with the little zipper pocket for a housekey or a dime for the paypone?) that I was so fond of in grade school - footwear is a funny thing.

October 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSeabird

Lol what on earth has happened to poor Tinkerbell.. She looks very full of cake. As for Maleficent.. maybe she got run over by a steamroller lol. Can't wait for Halloween to see what wreckerators destroy next.

October 28, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterArlene Marie

On second thought, stay where you are.

Maleficent's hand looks like a fork with nail polish, apparently she broke her jawbone, and what are those yellow things floating around her? Colorful, floating ants with lots of legs?

October 28, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterChocogirl

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