My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Shake It Off

Some songs are Taylor-made for Cake Wrecks.


I said, "Funnel cake."
This looks more like brains

But it's too late to change, mmm-mmm
It's too late to change, mmm-mmm.


Are you sure that's the date? [chuckle]
I guess I'm running late.

I'll take it anyway, uh-huh.
But I'm not gonna pay, uh-uh.


Wedding cake's oozing
Won't stop, keeps on pooling

The bride's gonna lose it
Any time
Tell her, "We'll eat it anyway..."


And if Dora's on your funeral cake, cake, cake
And Diego isn't dressed for a wake, wake, wake

Baby, why don't you just take, take, take, take
Take 'em off, take 'em off?


'Cause the baker's gonna bake, bake, bake, bake, bake
And add sprinkles 'til your teeth ache, ache, ache, ache

Baby, try a little shake, shake, shake, shake
Shake 'em off, shake 'em off


[Here comes the wrap part!]



'Cause the baker's gonna bake, bake, bake, bake, bake
And sometimes make a mistake, stake, stake, stake, stake

So Sue when you get this cake cake cake
Shake it off, shake it off!


Thanks to Abbe M., Vivian G., Laurel G., Rachel R., Jill D., Michelle L., and DG. You guys are great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, gre... oh, is that enough? Great.


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Reader Comments (40)

That unexpected Sprinkle Face made me laugh out loud! =-)

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterSeabird

Wrap part.

Thank you.

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

I feel as if that last cake were Taylor made for me.

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

What day is Buttday? I have several people I would love to recognize....

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered Commentermiss_paper

I'm thinking #1 looks more like intestines!

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterMelanie E.

Pbbbbffffft....That's me spitting coffee all over my keyboard, desk and monitor, laughing my arse off! You have outdone yourself Jen or John! The 'wrap' part? Genius! My daily laugh is complete and continues, thank you! Now if you'll excuse me, I have to grab the paper towels and spray cleaner for the coffee spill, errr, uh I mean 'spittle" but it's worth it!

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterCookiemama

The stuff on the blue box cake is supposed to be fondant, right? It looks more like Ultrasuede. But maybe with a few more years of practice, the decorator will be ready for Sunday Sweets. ;)

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered Commenterms_xeno

Does that really say "Happy Buttday?" Poor Sue.

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterKay

Flappy new year to all; and may I be one of the first to say that THAT "song" is one of the most annoying things I've heard in the last...well...EVER? I'd like to give the songstress a good SWIFT kick in the bundt!
(Oh, and the "wrap part" did tie things up nicely, and I did appreciate the ending. A lot.) =^~.-^=

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

LOL...great Tayloring of the song to the cakes...and, knowing you have a speedy, creative mind, no doubt you did it Swiftly! Loved the wrap part!

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered Commentermel

Oh god that wedding cake D:

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

Sue is having a buttday? Is this a liposuction cake?

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterJulie

First cake: Yumm, entrails cake! My favorite!

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterGrammar Gracie

There is at least $8.98 worth of sprinkles on the face cake.

And a Happy Buttday to you too. I think you've found the cover of your next book.

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterTricia L

Are you running out of submissions to choose from? I keep seeing repeat cakes in your posts. The "oozing wedding cake" was posted in October "Wreckin On the Dock of the Bay".

[Editor's note- Hi Tara. No, we've got about 13,000 unpublished cakes. The problem is that sometimes, we end up putting up something that we didn't mark as posted and neither Jen nor I remember it being up before. It's surprisingly hard to remember each of the 15,000 cakes on the site. Sorry about that. -john (thoJ)]

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterTara R

Wow. those are outstandingly bad. This is why I love this site. Happy New Year Yates!

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterKathleen

Buttday should totally be a thing!

Wait -- then they'd have to make cakes for it. Nevermind, abort, ABORT!

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterErica

Sadly, I think 'Buttcake' is a Fake Wreck. The dot of the 'i' has either been shopped onto the upright of the scrawny 'h', or picked off and placed there pre-photo. It's still an excellent pic, 'butt' not a pure-bred wreck.

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterBeth

That butday cake is about two weeks too late in addition to knot beeing slepped rite. But thanks for the gud thought!

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterSue W.

Sharyn your song parodies are simply the best! The wrap part put me over the edge though. Thanks for the laugh. I really needed it today!

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterSandy

Cake #3: Did they frost while it was hot?

Happy Buttday, one and all!!!!

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterKat in VA

Is that actually fondant on the wrap cake? How does one fold it that well without tearing it? I'm really curious about this. I'm going with a previous poster - betting it is really ultra suede, because fondant just doesn't act that way.

Yes, that is complete bafflement you are "hearing" in my words...

Poor Sue. Not sure how you can feel good about being wished a happy butt day. Kinda seems like sarcasm. doesn't it?

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterCatherine

This has been the best part of my day. Hands down.

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterJewel

I'm normally a lurker but I'm stepping out to say I really enjoyed today's post. Thanks for the laugh.

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterMegan's Mom

That wedding cake looks like a bunch of frozen ground beef patties of different sizes stacked on top of each other.

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterRay

I'm pretty sure that Wrap cake is NOT fondant, but simply edible (I hope!) paper.

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterBin

Le sigh.

When you said, "Taylor-made" I immediately thought of James Taylor.

I'm officially a geezer.

Get off my lawn!

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterChakolate

Sorry, I've got "Let it Go" still stuck in my head, but the post works with that, too...

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered Commenterwildmaven

The sprinkle face looks joyfully evil, like it can't wait to hear how many people end up with broken or chipped teeth when trying to eat it.

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterE.Anne

Beth: no, I disagree. The Happy Buttday cake looks genuine to me, except possibly that the disgruntled customer may have taken a fingernail to the i dot, which is in the right place but a bit faint. Picture yourself as a wreckerator who has started 'Happy' too far to the right and allowing it to sprawl recklessly so there isn't enough room for the next word. In 'Birthday', the r gets squashed in the attempt to save space, and when you have done h you have to start the ascender of d too near it, so that the bowl of the d, done from right to left, obliterates the arch of the h.

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterTachybaptus

Shriek. That third one looks like a stack of hamburger patties with beaten eggs thrown over it. If I was on the receiving end of that, I would sue the bakery back to the Stone Age.

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterNancy

I really needed a Sharyn song today! We are in the process of trying to find a new receptionist at work. It's not going well... Now I want that cookie with all the sprinkles so I can dance around the office singing "Shake 'em off, shake 'em off"! Wait, then I'd have to clean up the mess. Maybe I better rethink this...

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterJodee

Well done, Sharyn

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterMaureen S

When I was pregnant with my first son, he had fetal surgery for spina bifida. Basically, the surgeon cut into my abdomen, cut into the uterus, exposed my son's butt, and sewed up his back. Then the surgical team put everything back and I remained pregnant for 100 more days until I had him at full term.

Some parents of kids who have had fetal surgery call their fetal surgery dates their "Buttdays," because it's the day the kid was almost born--but just his/her butt was exposed. Not sure if the last cake is a fetal surgery baby or not, but there really is a (small) group of people who order "buttday cakes."

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterSled Hockey Mom

The wrap cake looks more like a napkin draped over part of the cake. Extra fiber?

January 6, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterNobodee Home

Well they can't say they want sprinkles now. I think the wreckerator tossed several bottles of sprinkles on it just to be sure lol. I wonder if it is safe to eat? Ah well most of these would make me run away not get a fork as it is lol.

January 7, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterArlene Marie

Yummy! Happy New Year!

January 7, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterMatt

Contrast the sprinkle-face cookie/cake with the infamous "I want sprinkles" cake; now that's some good irony!

"happy buttday"...classic!

January 7, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterNerfbomb

Yay, that's my wedding cake in #3! It was actually delicious lemon pound cake @Nancy It tasted good and I was pretty amused- but I won't be buying anything custom from them again!

January 8, 2015 | Unregistered Commenterhysilvinia

On this post I have to ask.

Who would even thing that serving a wedding cake only iced with the crumb coat is a good idea?

January 8, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterIsolder74

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