My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Santa Auditions

"Thank you all for coming to the Punxsutawney Mall Santa Auditions! We're here to find a special Santa 'stand-in' [winkwink] to take pictures with the kids this weekend. So, let's bring you in one by one, and have you give us your very best Santa greeting! Ok? Ok!

"First contestant, you're up!"

"ARR! Marrrrry Christmas, ye landlubbers!"

"Um...sorry, but I think we're looking for someone just a little more traditional. Next, please!"


"Bark! Bark bark bark bark!!"

"I'm confused. Are you a dog or a seal?"

"Not really sure, love, but look! I can throw things in the air!"



"Merry frickin' Christmas."

"Oh, my, is that really a proper Santa attitude?"

"Lady, quit screaming. Santa's head is KILLING him."



"How much for the women?"




"Ohhh kaaaay. I'm going to back away slowly now.


"Well, that's everyone, so I guess we'll just have to go with Mrs. Claus again this year. That ok with you, Mrs. Claus?

"Mrs. Claus?"

[ .... ]

"Look, I know you're great with the kids, but maybe you could consider, you know, talking once in a while."

[ .... ]

"Or blinking."


Thanks to Nick K., Michelle C., Laura C., Kim P., Sarah M., & Katie C. for the Silent Fright.


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And from my other blog, Epbot:

« Sunday Sweets: Stare-Worthy Christmas Cakes | Main | The 12 Wrecks Of Christmas »

Reader Comments (11)

1) Don't ask this pirate Claus to help. He won't do anything.
2) After delivering all those presents, Santa is dog tired. He's all pupped out. He's going to sit in his recliner and look at his Christmas plant - the pointersetter.
3) Santa needs to go into quarantine with a very severe case of pinkeye.
4) "Here's leering at you, kid."
5) Who let Dr. Frankenstein back into his lab over the holidays?
6) This is why you never get into a staring contest at the North Pole. Her eyes are now permanently frozen open and she'll need a lifetime supply of eye drops.

December 21, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterMike

I kind of wish pirate Santa was a thing. Also, grumpy Santa is one of the best CCCs I've ever seen. Not that that's saying much . . .

December 21, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterHeather

#5 is Achmed the Dead Terrorist!

December 21, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterKaren C

# 5,Silence (night), I keel you!

December 21, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterAnnie

Is the first one really supposed to be Santa? It looks like a deranged Pokeball.

December 21, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterJason

Sure the first one isn't supposed to be a Poke Ball? Or Electrode?

December 21, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterClassic Steve

Hysterical!!! Thanks-

December 21, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterEllen P

Did Santa melt into a Poke ball in that first one? That is the only thing I could think of lol. As for the rest I would back away slowly and pretend I didn't see any of them lol.

December 22, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterArlene Marie

“How much for the women” is a Blues Brothers reference, right?

December 22, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterCynthia

If it weren’t for the mustache and the earring, I’d swear that first Santa started life as a pokéball!

December 22, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterSeabird

The one above. Mrs. Claus is Achmed the dead terrorist TRYING to be Santa . . . . for some strange reason.

December 25, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterBridget Ilene Delaney

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