The Clucking Dead

Because bakeries are running out of ideas, I give you:

John Deere Zombie Chickens!


Also known as The Clucking Dead.


On a scale of 1 to gouging-out-your-own-eyes, how disturbing is this?

Personally, I think it falls somewhere between "Ped Eggs" and toddlers-who-won't-break-eye-contact.

But really, the best part are the buttons. Go on, think about it.


Ever heard the expression, "getting sh**-faced?"

'Cuz someone took that WAY too literally




Angie wanted to get her friend a cake, but there was a problem: apparently "Happy 50th Birthday, Melissa" wouldn't fit.

But don't worry, the baker was still able to squeeze something out:


So moving.

(Do you suppose the baker was wiped after this? Flushed with success? Ready for the next stream of orders? Hey, where are you going? [HAHA THAT WAS STILL A PUN] Come back! I haven't used my famous "You're in trouble" line yet!)


Thanks to Sarah P., Dimitra L., Gina V., & Angie W. for caring enough... to give a crap.

I’m so excited, y’all; I’ve been waiting to post this one for AGES:

Squatty Potty Dookie The Pooping Unicorn


And from my other blog, Epbot: