The War on Baby Showers

With all the scary C-section and jelly-soaked vagina cakes out there, I think we've lost track of what a baby shower cake SHOULD be.

No, this isn't it.

C'mon, guys, what's wrong with a sweet, heartfelt sentiment?

Or a cutesy character?

(On the plus side, it's nice seeing chocolate curls used for something other than "down there hair." [shudder])

Ok, how about some baby accessories? You know, bottles and bows, pacifiers and... uh...

...pee sticks.

Of course pee sticks.

Guess that beats putting the real thing on there, though - which, oh yes, people keep doing:

Thanks for not jamming the business end into the icing, I guess.

::sigh::

Ok, fine. Go back to your belly and butt and vajayjay cakes, people. BUT KNOW THIS: someday you, too, could be told, "There's cake in the break room!" like poor Lynds here, only to find that THIS is what someone actually brought in to work:

Clean up on aisle 3. Bring lots of brain bleach.

Thanks to Amanda S., Anony S., Rebekah D., Colleen F., Beka K., Corey, Nellie C., & Lynds for ensuring I will never eat a chocolate-sprinkled raspberry donut ever again.

*****

P.S., See, now HERE'S a cute idea for a baby shower: a Taco Tuesday accessory set:

That's an avocado rattle, ermergosh.

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And from my other blog, Epbot:

Hey, THEY Said It, Not Me

Calling all "Qualified" Cake "Decorators"!

Er...

Sure, it's a tough job, but someone's gotta poo it.

Though it does require you give a flying crap:

And be a regular person:

You know, no weirdos.

If that's you, then this job could be yours in a pinch!

A heaping pile o' fun!

Just remember to go with the flow:

But(t) not that much.

(Ooh, looks like the bride finally managed to get... a turd in edgewise.)
(AH THANK YOU, THANK YOU VERY MUCH.)

And thanks also to Anneke D., Patricia S., Amy K., Firas, Gail W., Cheyenne B., & Britani O. for passing on... the excitement.

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You may think the world doesn't need any more poop-themed products, but - BUTT! - I think you'll agree the world DEFINITELY needs the "Gotta Go Flamingo."

Why? Because it's a toy flamingo that comes with its own toilet and NO I'M NOT MAKING THIS UP:

Little Live Pets' "Gotta Go Flamingo"

Wow. Wow. The product photo of a kid pouring the "reusable food" out of the toilet and back into the flamingo's mouth is going to stay with me for a while.

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot: