My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

For Me?

Just had to share one last Valentine Wreck - because it was for ME! Well, in a virtual sense.

Sensitive Wreck Seeker Kate W. sent me an e-mail with the following message:

"I just wanted you to know that my heart boats for you. And not even the loud and obnoxious kind that overturns old men while they're fishing, but rather the put-put-put kind that's hard to steer. How's that for romance?"

Uh, a little more confusing than romantic, honestly, Kate.

Oh, wait! There's a photo:

Ahh, NOW I get it. And I'm touched, Kate, I really am. But not in the creepy, time-to-press-charges kind of way, but in the innocent, I-like-anyone-who-sends-me-cake kind of way.

Note: yes, technically that *is* an 'e', but at first glance it looks like an 'o', so I'm going with it. You should, too.

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Reader Comments (40)

looks like an "o" to me.....

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSarah

I don't understand how cake decorators can have such terrible icing-writing skills. Those words look like they were written by a 1st grader...and don't get me started on the whole "4 U" thing. I HATE that. Just write out the dang words!

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSara Doane

We call that Atrial Fibrillation.

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered Commenter5thsister

That's funny!

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterElleah

On the other hand, I'm quite impressed with the heart-monitor line across the top (the actual word currently escapes me . . . )

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterNaazju

Wow, you actually posted it! I'm so excited! Regarding my comments, I guess they make more sense when you see the original post I made in my blog: (Okay, maybe it doesn't make any more sense there, but at least I can claim not to have started it.) :)
--kate w.

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered Commentermelydia

I was a cake decorator. My training was someone handing me an icing bag and then telling me that I was going to be the cake decorator from now on.

I am glad that no photographic evidence exists from those early days.

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDon

"I don't understand how cake decorators can have such terrible icing-writing skills."

I totally agree Sara.

If I wanted sloppy cake writing, I'd do it myself! (Or ask my 12 year old nephew to do it for me.)
I'm paying someone else to do it because I want it to look nice!


Oh well. If they didn't screw it up, we wouldn't have these lovely cakes to laugh at.

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJennifer

From personal experience, writing on cake with icing is hard.. but it does look like and O

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAshley

At first I thought it said "My hurl boats 4 U".

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterThreadds

THE reason I don't do cake decorating or crafts that require writing mine wouldlook worse but then I am not a supposed professional either. th color of thered there brings dracula to mind for some reason...

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterskinny minny

It may be intended to be an e, but if it looks like an o, acts like an o....guess what? It's an o!

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBaking and Mistaking

A funny thing: my handwriting on cakes is vastly superior to my handwriting on paper. I have very nice icing-writing, but hand me a pen/pencil, and you might as well forget about deciphering it.
And that is sooo an "o".

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJasry


February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

Maybe the decorator was trying to stick with the medical theme and wrote it to look like a real doctor wrote it...maybe.

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKatie

It actually says "My heant boats for you...."

So it could be a *brand* of boat, called a "heant" and someone is giving it to his beloved for Vaslentimes' Day. (then, the only thing missing is the apostrophe on "boat's" i.e. "My Heant boat's for you")

Don't be such a hater with all of the criticism, Jen! You're such a sweetheart, but sometimes you take it a little far. I really think my explanation could be the correct one.

...No, really.....

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterheartafire

What? Nobody else's hearts boat? Mine does for about a week in the summer...

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterthelannatron

Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwww! tee hee

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKathryn Magendie

Definately an O. And even if you don't get any training, that shouldn't keep you from practicing.

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLizardbreath

The writing is so bad I thought it said: 'My huge boobs 4 U' for a minute. Given the artfulness of the cake, it could have. It's so hard to read shuddering, sinister icing text sometimes.


February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Next Valentine's Day, I expect to see a cake that does say "My Heart Boats 4 U", with a little heart in a boat.

Not too little, or it might look like something else.

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterD.B. Echo

I just have to point out that the EKG isn't correct, technically.

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSheila

"E" or "O" issue aside, that EKG does NOT show a beating heart. As another commenter mentioned, it looks like atrial fibrillation, or, put another way, someone who didn't take the two seconds to google what an actual heart rhythym looks like.

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAriel

I totally thought it said, "My heart boats 4 U."

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTHE OFFICE OM

Yeah, but "my heart's in afib, so somebody better load me up on AC's and put my cardiologist on call" just wouldn't fit on the cake...

(At least it wasn't V-tach, right?)

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSpecial Sauce

Ah, the perfect cake for those who like to remind their paramour of their own mortality. And boats.

Also, previous posters are saying 'EKG'. Please do not tell me that in the US Cardio is spelt with a K... Surely not. Alongside '4 U', I think my little heant might get boaten at such liberties with language.

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterGlory von Hathor

I love this site. I was a professional cake decorator in a previous life. It really isn't that hard to write in icing.

My training was watching my mom (who had taken Wilton lessons) and getting a book out and following the directions to teach myself.

Now a UNION job as a cake decorator is much more demanding, they do the whole apprentice thing and everything so you really learn the craft, not like what the poor folks in the grocery store bakery experience.

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterValerie

The Dr. iced this cake. He scribbled 'My Heart Beats 4 U' in prescription handwriting. snicker, snicker...or,he must have been drugged when icing.

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLonnie
February 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

That was just funny...=D
I think the person who decorate that cake must learn more on how to decorate and write better than it does!!!=)
But i do like that presentation..
Love it..

February 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSolo

Mmmm what an interesting cake blog. I love it!

February 18, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterroentarre

It looks like an 'o' at second glance too!

February 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTypo Tat

and i thought i was the only one that was going to comment on that rhythm...

ps my word verification was "sunhos"
ohhhh yeah.

February 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

well that explains the strange CCC on yesterday's post then - it's not Texas or Ohio, it's a heart boat.

February 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCaite

I want to see a guest blog from Don who said "I was a cake decorator. My training was someone handing me an icing bag and then telling me that I was going to be the cake decorator from now on."

I'm in Canada and we say EKG and ECG both. I suspect the inventor was German and we just took the untranslated acronym with Kardiogram.

WV: ponsil - You might be on an EKG if you have your ponsils removed under general anesthetic.

February 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAviatrix

It should say my heart beats irregularly for you because that is not a very healthy looking wave pattern there.

February 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

yeah, that beat's not only irregular but it's missing a few I'm wondering how long that heart is going to be "boating" for this other person!

February 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I just wanted to say hello, found you via Pophangover and I love your blog. I'll be back!

February 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSara

lol really bad icing. Fred Smilek is the acting president of the Society to Save Endangered Species. It was founded two years ago by Fred Smilek along with his two best friends Charles and Jonathan.

February 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

@Valerie -- great, UNION cake. Does it have that same crap-tastic flavor that GM and Dodge vehicles do?

Blah unions. You get paid what you're worth.

June 30, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJoe Fox

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