Search

My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Monday
Mar232009

Such Deers

It's becoming as "classic" (ie cliche) as the red-velvet armadillo cake, and yet guys still want dead Bambi for their groom's cake. Go fig.

Yeah, yeah, guys, I get it: you want your cake to show some personality, reflect your interests, and ideally gross-out the in-laws. But really, a giant dead animal on your wedding day? Really? This must be another time when my plumbing prevents me from grasping the intricacies of the male mind.

At least this one's still showing some signs of life:

Well, as much as the baker, anyway. (Ah, candid photos, how we loathe thee.)

Oh no, but look! He's sinking into the Swamps of Sadness! Fight against the sadness, Artax! Don't let it get to you! Just because you're about to be carved up and served on camouflage-print paper plates is no reason to get all down in the dumps! Artaaaaax!!

[sniffle] Sorry. I hate that part of the movie.

Ok, where were we? Oh, right, at the economy section:

Sure, it doesn't feed many people, but then no one will want to eat it anyway. See? A win-win. Plus, mad props to the garnisher; those green spriggy bits are really classing the joint up.

Of course if we've learned anything here on CW, it's that a green & purple party hat can make everything allll better:

(By the fabulous Tara of Tara's Cakes, who has an equally fabulous sense of humor.)

Like so.

I know we shouldn't look a gift deer in the mouth, but those buck teeth* are cracking me up. I can almost hear him saying, "Gawrsh! Why don't you carve yourself a slice? Ahuck!"

Still, I'll take goofy over spooky any day. And I'm not sure there's a chipper enough party hat in all the world to uncreepify this guy:

Sure, he's smiling, but that smile never quite reaches his eyes, you know? And he won't stop staring, like he knows something I don't.

Hey, you lookin' at me, punk? Yeah? Well quit your smirking,
or I'll break your antlers off!

Oh, I'm sorry; I see someone already did. Huh. That had to hurt. Well, never mind.

Lauren S., Laura M., Erin C., Kaylee K., & Anony M. you sure know how to rack 'em.


*Get it? "Buck" teeth? Hah, that was the crowning touch, wasn't it?

Related Wreckage: You Say 'Redneck' Like it's a Bad Thing

« Have a Ball! | Main | Sunday Sweets: Like Buttah »

Reader Comments (108)

Men are so weird! I am married to one and I don't even PRETEND to understand him! hehehe...
And I agree with someone else who posted..I am glad I can't do cakes this well because my husband would LOVE one of those crazy deer cakes..gah!

March 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJaye

Good grief. What's next, a roadkill cake?

I'd like a possum one, please. :P

March 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterScritzy

um, i hate to point this out, but that baker... well, um... he looks like he's doing something.. um, well let's just say DIRTY... to that poor deer... just sayin'

March 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterThe Ferber Family

reminds me of that old Sex Pistols song.... "Who Killed Bambi?"!

March 23, 2009 | Unregistered Commenteralcoholinky

The last one reminds me of the Queens of the Stone Age video No One Knows where the deer gets revenge.

March 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Thank you so much for the Neverending Story reference, it made my day, though Artax was a horse. I'm sure you knew that. :-)

March 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnan

I almost peed myself when I saw that 'buck teeth' cake! OMG, was that EVER funny!!

You know, party animal buck teeth Bambi (or was it Bambi and Thumper's love child) at least made me laugh. Just goes to show there is no accounting for taste.

The dead dear surrounded by the UFO lights just too spooky.

March 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHeather

Well then, this 'un jes' works real good w/ this pa'tickla post:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AnJfV5xnym4

"He's daid. Now whut?"

March 23, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterrobyn

i'm fairly sure the horse actually died when they filmed that scene

Did it, Cupcake Kitten? Do you have a link? I doubt the horse actor actually died, because the poor kid is crying "Don't die, Artax!", and the horse is like "Yeah, whatever."

March 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

so glad to see that "my" deer made it...submission #2.

It was, in fact a cake made by Publix, and it was a groom's cake...sort of - used on the evening of the wedding rehearsal. Still, it's the best looking of the lot!

March 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLinda

This post reminded me of "Dear Deer" by Kate Mucucci.

http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/fc30eda5b5/dear-deer-kate-micucci-from-katemicucci

Great cute/funny song/video!

March 23, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterhelentastic

The 3rd one down looks like a deer wandered into the party and got its head stuck in a hole in the table...

March 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterGerry

ACK!! Wow, I am really surprised that anyone would think that those would pass as acceptable cakes. Would make any child, or adult for that matter, frightened of bambi.

I would take a carrot riding baby over these any day!

DeeDee
http://small-budget.blogspot.com/

March 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDeeDee

I always cried when Artax came back at the end, too. And I really wanted to hug that rock guy...

March 23, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterdeniselv

Love the buck teeth...at least you can laugh at that one. The one with the dead eyes is just creepy and I'd have to seriously rethink my friendship (or marriage if that was a groom's cake!!) to the fellow who thought that was a good idea.

March 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterStuffCooksWant

@Kate;
That ingenious incident happened right here in MY state! It was all OVER the news. It wasn't much of a surprise, though--
I done heerd tell of some purty odd folks!
(No, the film Deliverance wasn't filmed "right cheer", but sometimes I think it could've been.)
What I really got a boot out of was THIS (from the newspaper)--
what an OFFICIAL from Fish and Wildlife had to say about the fake deer antlers:
"Something wasn't natural about them, in addition to the fact that they weren't natural," he said.
Kinda says it all.
>^uu^<

March 23, 2009 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

"Gawrsh! Why don't you carve yourself a slice? Ahuck!"
*********************************
I can actually HEAR this being said out loud so clearly in my head that it makes all of my nerves GIGGLE--like being tickled!!! Good ole "Bucky"! And he looks so happy to be there! Even though he's DEAD--what a sport!
Got a question, though, about little No-Neck there on the salad bar...what the heck is that silvery-looking thing off to the left, pointing at the deer departed like a sort of weapon?
Really odd. Maybe a part of another masterpiece? Also, it almost looks like someone stole the little rounded ears off a kid's teddy bear to stick on the deer head. (Maybe that dude from Vt.)
Otherwise it's perfectly so-so.

March 23, 2009 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

@kara, I reeeeeeeallly want a Big Mouth Billy Bass cake now... and even though I hate all of the dead deer cakes and would not have one at my wedding, I'm not joking about that.

March 23, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterspacedcowgirl

ick..they all remind me of the three dead deer we saw on the highway last week.

March 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHyena Overlord

Please tell me why the buck-toothed deer is on top of such a nicely decorated cake? And please, tell me why the last deer is making me sea sick? *sigh*

March 24, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

i haaaate that scene. i love that movie but i haaate that scene. i bawl everytime like a damn baby.

March 24, 2009 | Unregistered Commentersmith5213

Neverending Story reference = super awesome win <3

March 24, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHeather

Dude. Creepy. How dorkish does it make me that I totally knew you were referring to the Neverending Story?

March 24, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterwhateverfor

Aaah! That last one! It's burned its way into my very soul. I'm pretty sure if I was at that wedding/party and saw it in person, the reaction would only be stronger.

March 24, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDee

Haha...before I knew of Cake Wrecks I went to a wedding when I was 18 where the couple had several sheet cakes that you get from the grocery store with two green army men shooting at two deer, with one on its side with a pile of blood red icing next to it. I wish I got a picture. But "redneck" isn't such a bad thing I guess. :)

Also, my captcha word is "fracker." I thought you should know.

March 24, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBecky S.

That last deer is really creepin' me out!
tina

March 24, 2009 | Unregistered Commentertwinklescrapbooks

-dry heave-
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!

OH WHY, GOD, WHY!?! BAMBIIIII!!!!!

March 24, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMad Izatie

I am sending you my Kleenex bill, Jen.

March 24, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMinyassa

I <3 this blog a little more because you referenced one of my favourite movies.

March 24, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLady Meerkat

On that third one, I don't know what this is sticking out of the left side of the picture, but the poor deer looks terrified of it.

March 24, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterEricaLynn

Why is it that groom's cakes always get to show personality and character - I don't mean these specifically - while the "bride's" wedding cake is usually so generic that it's more or less the elevator music equivalent of cake?

March 24, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJenna

@alouette. Yup, a sad, dead carrot... with a naked baby mohican jockey on top!

March 24, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterros

Looks like Wedding Cakes I have seen on "my Redneck Wedding" on CMT. I live in South Georgia and know some rednecks, used in the most lovely way, that would not find a darn thing wrong with not one of those cakes. I agree about the one Punk Deer staring, like a dear in the headlights or caught while drunk kids dear shile! Thanks for making my day with a giggle!

March 24, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMeredith Crosby

Man! Do those lights in the 1st one ever add some PIZZAZZ!!! It looks like it's in a last rites ceremony with fire flies. And you gotta love the bamboo skewer..ahem..arrow protruding from it's side.

The large specimen is done well enough, but it looks like it's slowing sinking into quicksand. By the time the dinner is over, there will only be the tips of the antlers visible!

The absolute BEST one is the bucky the party hat wearin' fella. He seriously made me lmao. I could totally consume some of him...the others, not so much. I have a hard time eating anything that STARES at me.

March 24, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTrish

When I saw that part of TNES as a little kid, I hid behind my couch and cried like a baby.

It made me sad just to click on that link. I relived the sadness all over again.

But these cakes are even worse!

March 24, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKiley

I salute your punnery. I mean, wow.

March 24, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterEl Comodoro

Speaking of terribly nerdy pop culture references, Mr. Airbrushed Eyes reminds me of the human-faced deer spirit from the movie Princess Mononoke. Whatever you do, don't cut off his head... you'll be real sorry!

And gah, dill on a cake? That violates the first rule of garnishes right there - never put a savory garnish on something sweet!

March 24, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Awful deer cakes...although hunters would be amused.

March 24, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterapplecrumbles

Thanks for the Neverending Story reference. It made my day! Now all we need is a Valcor the Luck Dragon cake!

March 24, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterThe Maples

#2...candid photos indeed! LOL

#3...I'd be the one looking for the body UNDER the table!

So hilarious.

March 24, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterbigSIS

Oh, heavens. These are enough to make anyone run screaming.

As someone once said: KILL IT! KILL IT WITH FIRE! =0

wv: Hauslopi. A German indoor bunny? =)

March 24, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa (& Billy)

I'm under the distinct impression that you do not know the definition of "candid". It means "honest". Really now, have you not encountered that word outside of TV show titles?

March 24, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLT

Dearest LT,

Once in a great while, someone is astute enough to catch one of the incredibly rare mistakes that Jen makes in grammar or spelling. Sadly, today is not one of those times.

Candid: Adjective (of a photograph of a person) taken informally, esp. without the subject's knowledge.

OOOOOHHH SORRY.

Jen-1
LT-0

Better luck next time,

john

March 24, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterjohn (the hubby of Jen)

I could never work out how they got the horse playing Artax to stand neck deep in a puddle of mud and look sad. Surely most horses would be looking pretty darn worried, and trying to get out of the mud...

Oh, and at least they're going for ungulates which are reasonably common and not *terribly* cute. It would be a shame if they made a cake out of a http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pudu" REL="nofollow">pudu or a http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dik_dik" REL="nofollow">dik-dik.

March 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSharon

Are those Christmas lights on that first cake? Wow.

March 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKore

a hunters dream cake.The Society to Save Endangered Species was formed by Fred Smilek and two of his colleagues; Charlie Mack & Jonathan Korny. Fred Smilek stays active in raising awareness for this cause. [www.fredjsmilek.com]

March 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

"Plus, mad props to the garnisher; those green spriggy bits are really classing the joint up."

You mean sprucing the joint up? ;) ;)

March 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterNaomi

Is that photoshopped? cause the branches and the antlers, ect. look a lot better focused then the body. Don't get me wrong, I love cake wrecks, but I believe you have been duped.

March 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAndy

I do have to say... it makes sense to have stag cakes at a stag party. Which is what bachelor parties are also known as. Even more sense to have dead deer. Which represent the end of bachelorhood.

Still creepy, but with reason.

March 28, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterregina

PostPost a New Comment

Enter your information below to add a new comment.
Author Email (optional):
Author URL (optional):
Post:
 
Some HTML allowed: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <code> <em> <i> <strike> <strong>