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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Tuesday
Mar032009

"And in the Mornin', I'm Making WAFFLES."

Today's Wreck is so unrecognizable I figured I better give you as many clues as possible before showing it to you.

Clue #1: He's big, green, and lives in a swamp.

Clue #2: He's a cartoon ogre.

Clue #3: His name is Shrek.

Clue #4: He looks like this:

Ok, have you guessed who it is yet? Here comes the Wreck! (Choo choo!)

AAAAAUUUGGGHHH!!!

Ahem.

Ok, so it's shiny, toothy, and has a homicidal glint in its dead, dead eyes.

On the other hand, now we know what would happen if the Incredible Hulk and Sloth from the Goonies ever had a love child. Right, Michelle Y.?

« Parting is Such Sweet Sorrow | Main | Nah, These Won't Traumatize the Kids at ALL »

Reader Comments (134)

This is very obviously a goblin, not an ogre. The chin is the marking.

March 3, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterriftinsanity

AAHHH! as soon as i saw the name of this post, i freaked. 1 of my favorite movie quotes ever!!!!! we needed a shrek-wreck.....thanks jen!!!!!!!!!

March 3, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

It looks more like one of the mean gremlins fed after midnight in the movie "Gremlins"! Only green.

March 3, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterkhek

Something about his dead-eyed stare, combined with that ridiculous grin, sets off all my giggle triggers. Heeheeheehee!

Dermingl: What Shrek's skin does as it slowly dissolves and mixes with the acid gloop covering his face. Or at least, that's what it looks like.

March 3, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterFreezair

Oh my God! That is the ugliest cake I've ever seen. I don't think I could eat that...the green...the black...the ugly face...UGH!

March 3, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSallyMae

Seems Shrek paid a visit to the local nuclear plant. That probably explains the shine and the mutated face.

I don't know about you, but I'd take dead blue elephants, dead pig butts, and the headless bobby soxer anyday over this!

---Bree

March 3, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Hulk and Sloth love child??!? Hahahahahahahahahahaha!!

March 3, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterEllen C.

Oh dear

March 3, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterPrincess Talula

Sloth love Chunnnnnnnk.

March 4, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterC

Are you sure that's not supposed to be a Vogon?

March 4, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJoe

TOO FUNNY! It looks like those green things in The Secret World of Og!

March 4, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJacqs

Oh, my God...that is hilarious. I'm laughing so hard I'm crying!

March 4, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMisha

He looks like the "Green-head-on-the-wall" wizard on the Wizard of Oz!!!

March 4, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTeri

*cringes* They expect you to actually eat that?! O_O

March 4, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

oh my..that cake looks like a galum (spelling) from lord of the rings....

March 4, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMaire

Mother of God! That is horrifying!

March 4, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnna

It's Yoda's beatnik brother. See it, with the little thin beard? "Hey, all you Jedi cats and kittens..."

March 4, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Regarding the "Incredible hulk/Sloth" comment, I only have 3 words: "Hey You GUUUUUYS!"

Ryan P

March 4, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMoraelyn

Shrek got hit with something; just can't figure out what.
~Amy B

March 4, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

I immediately thought "WoW goblin" too. Maybe I've been playing too much World of Warcraft.

March 4, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterwondermart

OH MY! That is the most sick cake I ever seen!

I love to see that you get so many comments :) keep up the good work, and thanks for posting!

March 4, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I submitted this. It was just as grotesque in person. The eyes were very gelatinous and wiggly like jello and they were yellowish. It was for my three year old daughter's birthday. None of the kids seemed to care but we adults laughed (I even laughed after I got over being so annoyed about it).

And as gross as it looks it was actually REALLY tasty.

-Michelle

March 4, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMichelle

I didn't know Peas and Boogers was a Crayola color.

March 4, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAri

HOLY CRAP!! This may be the worst wreck yet. For realz. :S

March 4, 2009 | Unregistered Commentervelocibadgergirl

Does anyone else see E.T.? I'm laughing so hard I'm crying, but I'm sure I see E.T. ... after too much space radiation.

March 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSteph-chan

It looks like the goblins from World of Warcraft.

March 6, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterslythwolf

My kids always complain that I never laugh out loud... unless I'm reading your blog, then I just can't hold it in. Too funny.

March 6, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterEllen Gormley

That Shrek cake looks scary!

March 7, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterEmma

I showed my 3-year old (a HUGE Shrek fan) this cake.

Me: Who's this?

him: (blank stare)

Me: (scrolling up to picture of Shrek) Who's this?

him: Strek!

Me: (scrolling back down) OK, now who's this?

him: (blank stare)

There you have it. It's officially not "Strek"

March 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMrsEmbers

Just don't feed it after midnight, get it wet, or leave it out in the sun.

March 31, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSophia Nightengale

Conjoined twin mutant turtles that just a minute ago were on top of the Empire State Building but are now on Shrek's head.

August 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTags

That's just DISGUSTING!

September 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHanny Banany!!!

omg, that's one demented shrek!

November 10, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Shrek's adventures in the nuclear power plant part 2: How reactors work... From inside.

December 21, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterG

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