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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Wednesday
Feb032010

What's That Spell?

For all you football lovers out there, I *think* today's cakes all have football team names on them. (That's my keen deductive reasoning at work again. That, and the teensy plastic footballs.)

PRO TIP: Sometimes "sounding it out" doesn't always work out.

'Course, neither does this:

I especially like the dash. Go - Wreckerators!

"Zoot-a-lo! 'E' is missing!"

(Now try to read that aloud without sounding French. Go on. Eh? Am I right?)

Team Chorger is apparently made up of a single player. Aw. Sad.

This next one isn't so much a spelling error as it is a "Hey-o! Lunchtime!" error:

If the Patriots were from Detroit, this would be perfectly excusable:


What's worse than misspelling your team's name?

How about misspelling the name of your state?

Yowza.

Hey, is there an echo in here?

The NYJ's Jets? Isn't that like saying the ATM machine?
(Oh, see, NOW I'm hitting close to home, huh? Yeah. Don't feel bad; I've said it, too.)

This final one doesn't have a name at all, but I like this decorator's style:

It's simple yet effective, in a poetic kind of way. Which team will win? What's it all mean? Why are we decorating a big chocolate chip cookie with huge gobs of icing? Why?

Michelee U., Robert G., Will H., Rachel B., Lynda B., Molly S., Stacy M., Sarah O., & Elsha H., go! Fight! Win! (And call me when you get back, dahlings; I enjoy our visits.)

- Related Wreckage: Introducing a Good Sport

« Recycled Wrecks | Main | Holy Smokes! »

Reader Comments (122)

I happen to be a tremendous football fan. And how you one be against something that contributes so much to the mirth that is cake wrecks? Love football. Love cake wrecks.

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLaura Sue

The mystery cake wins!

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterThe Shitty Astrologer

The phrase is spelled zut alors, fyi.

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

You are killing me, Jen! The cakes are great, but as always, your commentary knocks it out of the park...or should I say...makes a touchdown! hee hee

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBilinda

Great wrecks! Great quotes! Great comments!

Great googley-moogley, what a great day!

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterlisadh

and here I thought I was a bad speller...

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJessica

#2--How do we know we're not cheering on Vicki? Maybe she's the first girl on a football team somewhere....Especially with lavender icing.

#3: LOVE the effect of the egg-shaped pan. so non-football like. And with the dirtbrown and the careful "stitching"--it looks like an archaeological dig with an exhumed skeleton of...something. Hammerhead shark, perhaps?

4: Poor Chorger. And someone put silly string on his cake.

6: Why are there 90 Patroits? Doesn't that seem a little excessive?

7: the Texes football is looking a little droopy. deflated. something. but not like a decent football. The egg pan would probably have been a better choice than a half round on its side.

9: is the kind of cake that is so all purpose! Who will win the superbowl? who will win the world series? will the baby be born a boy or a girl? will so and so survive surgery? etc. It also seems so philosophical, in an existentialist sort of way. "If I don't have an inscription, am I really here?" "If I am a giant cookie, should I still be in the cake case?" "?"

wv: inscr--the kind of inscription that leaves you hanging, like #9, or better, like #5 where they just stopped writing. presumbably to go to lunch or the bathroom in a HURRY. at least it's not poo brown. what a fun way to decorate a cake. "Happy Birt--" "Good luck, Ja--" Maybe it could be combined with the question mark. "So long ?" "Happy Anniversary Mark and ?" someone just doesn't finish their thoug--
THAT's "inscr"

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Stephanie, you may be on to something. It's a very neutral cake to celebrate whomever wins so you can buy it before the party. But the team colors are there to "celebrate" the fact they're both playing. Good way for the cake not to go to waste, either. Who wants to buy a cake for the losing team?

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

All my exes live in Texes...

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLefty

@Gary--Texas Exes? sounds like a divorce person's support group. I wonder if they tote guns to the meetings.

wv: fouga. "Who can fouga out what the wreckerators were trying to spell here?"

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

@ Anon 11:11
sounds tit for tat to me. science geeks have parties?

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

My favorite in this set is the Go Eagls cake that's made from a mold that appears to be intended as an Easter egg.

hippity hop, hippity hop

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMeredith

Great post!

At my college, the swipe cards were called "JAC" - an acronym within an acronym already, it stood for "JMU Access Card", but of course everyone says "JAC Card", so you've got the redundancy going on, too! haha

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRenee

The "Texes" Cake decorator was listening to "All My Exes are In Texas" and just blurred the spelling.

Cindy

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCindy

that last one might like... a stadium of sorts! With the icing supposed to be seating of two different groups of fans...

Okay, yeah, I'm just guessing in the dark here.

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterNala

Barre - You remember correctly. It was a Snickers commercial. GREAT GOOGLY-MOOGLIES!!!

The only thing funnier than adults obsessed with the American version of Gladiatorial Combat is the cake wrecks which descend from it. I'm just sayin'...

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnn

I saw a similar one about a year ago that was a CCC with a weird blob shape that was trying to look like a football player's helmeted head that said "I'm Ray #52"

Now I just want to try and find one of these cakes so my friends and I can laugh at them on Sunday.

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterThe Black Dog

Yay an "Incredibles" reference!! I heart this site!

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMichelle

To Casey- it's from the Little Mermaid (the French chef says it). It's actually "zut alors".

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

All my exes live in Texes.

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

'Anonymous' sez:
"@Gary--Texas Exes? sounds like a divorce person's support group."

Hey, I didn't name it. My own alma mater calls its former students' club the "Alumni Association." How's that for orginality?

"I wonder if they tote guns to the meetings."

No, that's for the annual UT vs. Texas A&M grudge match.

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGary

The worst part of the "Eagls" cake? If you live anywhere near the city of Philadelphia, you know the Eagles fight song by heart. And the final line of it (meant to be sung in a loud and obnoxious manner) is "E-A-G-L-E-S EAGLES!!!!" clearly, this wreckerator is not from around here.

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKathi In NJ

Ohio! Fonix tapsis werking A-OK. Dunker shine.

@ Anon 1:12 -- By Zeus! Thanks for the spelling rule. Now we can break 'em.

WV: Honym -- Oh, pass out the dictionaries? I'll get honym right away.

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered Commentermsyendor

What is sad about these cakes is not just that they were created, but I bet someone actually paid the bakery for their destruction of a sub-par "Grand Football Event" party.

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKevin

It seems you know more about football than you think. Most people don't even know Detroit has a football team, but you....you know!

And the "Patroits" are the closest we will ever get to a Super Bowl.

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLindalou

Mmmmm...big chocolate chip cookie with huge globs of icing....

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJohn and Sarah Sperry

Looks like it's Sing-Along Time again! :D

(Zut alors, I have missed one!)
Sacre bleu
What is this?
How on earth could I miss
Such a sweet little succulent crab?
Quel dommage
What a loss
Here we go in the sauce
Now some flour, I think
Just a dab
Now I stuff you with bread
It don't hurt 'cause you're dead
And you're certainly lucky you are
'Cause it's gonna be hot
In that big silver pot
Toodle-loo, mon poisson
Au revoir!

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

"Team Chorger"

Hey, looks like Coach Z got a job as a Cake Wreckerator!

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterUlrike

Horrible (and hilarious) as these cakes are, I can honestly say I would gladly eat a piece from any of them (perhaps while everyone else was in the other room watching the "game"). Yesterday's cakes . . . not so much. (Retch)

Liz in Seattle

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

i liked the choclate chip cookie it looked yummuy.
The "?" was probably who will the winner be...

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered Commentermisty pig

I actually like the last cake---it would save you money trying to figure out which team cake to buy!

The "Go Vickings" cake...I think the wreckorator has some unresolved issues about Michael Vick.

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBree

My favorite repeat is DSW Shoe Warehouse. Designer Shoe Warehouse Shoe Warehouse. Cat

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Hooray for the Incredibles reference Jen!!!

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

All these redundant phrases have me singing a little song to myself, which goes something like: "Que será, será…será, será, será, será…" I just can’t seem to stop… :O

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

"ATM Machine" is still not as good as "GCO Georgia Carpet Outlets" I'm just sayin'.

I want the ? cookie frosting melange!! Gimme!!

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSusan

I love the question mark one! That decorator must not know anything about football.

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSexy Sadie

At least none of the cakes referred to the "Super Bowel".

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAndrea

"Team Chorger is apparently made up of a single player." I feel even worse that he has TWO footballs and no one else to play with.

"Somebody come and plaayyy..."

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I didn't read all of the posts but did anyone else notice that the Eagle is holding a NY Giants helmet rather than an Eagles helmet??!?! Rachael B-S

February 3, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterrachael

That reminds me - I used to work at an art supply store directly across from the Kimmel Center (a big music hall in Philadelphia). I happened to glance out of the window of my store the day after they finished building the Center, only to see a homeless fellow spray painting "FLY EAGLES, FLY" on the side of the building. Only..he got to "FLY EAG" and then he just sort of...stopped. And looked at it for a full minute. As he started to paint an "E", a police officer nabbed him. So, for a week, the side of the Kimmel Center said "FLY EAGE", which is just so...charming.

February 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterStephanie Y.

My wife made me "Carinals" cake. Clearly they lost because their "D" was missing.

February 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterChuck

What- not Saints cakes?

February 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLauren

Didn't you pay attention in grammar class? One Texas, two Texes. It's a simple plural, what do they teach people in school these days?

February 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterPhillip

There was a good ad in Australia for our football. A man is doing painting on the field for the 'Crows'. He finishes and looks at his work. A footballer comes up and says 'That's great mate, but who are the cows?' This was a beer ad, by the by. And it was a football field being painted, not a cake. At least with the cake you can remove the evidence... unless photographed.

February 4, 2010 | Unregistered Commentershikishinobi

Perhaps if the Chargers had more than one player they would have won that last game.

February 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJenny Reiswig

My personal favourite is PIN number.

February 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterHeather

Phillip sez:
"Didn't you pay attention in grammar class? One Texas, two Texes. It's a simple plural, what do they teach people in school these days?"

I beg to differ, Phillip. There can only be one Lone Star State. This country couldn't handle two Texes.

February 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGary

Do people actually charge...no wait, better question. Do people actually PAY for these? I mean if it comes down to this, I will buy a plain frosted sheet cake and a squirt can of frosting and do it myself. I mean there is mistakes and then there are FAILS. These are definitely the latter.

February 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBigCanada

methinks the Texes person has this year's returns on his/her mind....

February 4, 2010 | Unregistered Commentervb

Ha - I saw half-moon cookies at my grocery store that all said "Go Vickings" but I didn't have my phone on me to take a picture.

February 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

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