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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Tuesday
Aug172010

Fairy Tale Endings

WARNING: Today's post is not family friendly, on account of it being a little TOO "family friendly." IF you knowwuddamean.

Ah, children. So innocent. So sweet.

So blissfully unaware of how much their castle cakes look like a gaggle of man cannons.


I believe this is from the Netherlands. (Eh? Eh?)

Oh, oh! OR, if it were in Troy, then this would be a TROJAN castle.
(Get it? See what I did there? BOOYA.)

I'd say this customer got royally shafted:


[Zing!]

I mean, just look at that top tower: totally cockeyed!

[Pow! Zam! Whap!]

Still, this next castle cake really can't be beat:


[Sha-ZAM!]

Yep, that's some stiff competition, right there. Definitely has the upper hand.

[Rat-a-tat-tat! BzzzING! Ker-PLUEY! Eckie Eckie Eckie Eckie piTANG RoooBoing ezrowsurh]

Lauri, Lisa M., & Sarah H., they say "a man's home is his castle."

Frankly, I can't top that.

Also, 3 geek points if you correctly ID the Eckie Eckie line.

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Reader Comments (160)

Monty Python!

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAshley

Monty Python, duh!

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Monty Python and the Quest for the Holy Grrrrail!

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterM

MONTY PYTHON AND THE HOLY GRAIL, KNIGHTS WHO SAY (FORMERLY SAID) NI!

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCryptid Hunter

Oh good lord...

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJW

Monty Python and the Holy Grail (the Knights Who Say Ni)! Nice...

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterZermanator

The Knight Who Say NEE!
Now, Bring me a shrubbery.

Normie

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Poor, poor, little children. They will grow up and look back on their birthday and cringe, haha.

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterdragonrose18

What a shame. The first cake would look sweet if not for the castle shapes. Or are they supposed to be mushrooms? (Was the baker on mushrooms?)

The "eckie" line is famous enough that I won't identify it directly. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to sharpen my herring.

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterClassic Steve

Monty Python and the Holy Grail!

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJulia

and the holy grail...

didn't everyone memorize that back in 8th grade?

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterNicole

Today was a cracker. Thanks for the laugh.

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMarie

The first cake is a bit of a stretch of the imagination, IMHO, but the second cake ?!??!! I wouldn't raised, no pun intended, all kinds of h$&@ about, and def not paid for, let alone served to a large group.

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Phallic Castle Cakes: Not Just a Cock and Bull Story

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

MP Holy Grail of course - "We are the Knights who say nee" until they become the knights who say that mess :P

WV: "mount" the knight needs a new mount? The knight needs to mount a few of them there castles? uhm- there is just too much to do with that one :P

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKaren

"We are no longer the Knights who say NI!" well you know the rest. :)

Wow, those are some truly disturbing cakes. You only HOPE the children's minds haven't already been pulled into the gutter at a tender age and MAYBE they just think they're misshapen mushrooms. Reminds me of the cover art from The Little Mermaid...

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGrnEyes

Monty Python and the Holy Grail! Oh Dennis, there's some lovely filth over here!

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJenniffer

Monty Python and the Holy Grail, specifically, the Knights Who Used to Say "Ni," But Now Say, "Ecki Ecki Ecki..." etc..

Oh yes, I am a fan!

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRoger. The Shrubber.

Gaggle of man cannons!! Hahahahaha!

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCarlie

Give us a hard one next time! Knights who until recently said NI and now say "Ekke Ekke Ekke Ekke Ptang Zoo Boing Zow Zing!"

For extra geek points, I point out these knights also protect "peng" and "Neeeee-wom"!

I love that movie, and the cake wrecks are HILARIOUS. Silly castles...

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLeine

Ni! made my morning, thanks :)

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRbeforeE

WE are no longer the nights who say Nih! We are the knights who say "ekki-ekki-ekki-ta-pang!!!" Monthy Phyton, of course. If you want to pass, you must bring a shrubbery :-D

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCath

Bring me a shrubbery...

shrubbery will yield another 17+ rated photo day

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterUpupaepops

Is it just me, or on the second cake do the ivy tendrils on the lower "towers" kind of look like veins? Which, of course, just adds to the theme, I guess.

WV: Legiteri- The bakers need some therapy to make their cakes more legiteri.

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterthesacredandtheprofane

Awesome post, I recognised the eckie eckie with a major facepalm but the post was especially funny :P Was in tears from your Netherlands quip xD

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLulu

" gaggle of man cannons."
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
That is beyond funny.

I also really enjoy the comment that boasts "shrubbery will yield another 17+ rated photo day" Inspiration!

It's just a flesh wound.

Ahhhhhhhh!!!!

I'll not dignify the reference, simply ask for a shrubbery.

To hide behind from these 'man cannons'.

*snort* You've done it again.

~~Di

Must mention my wv was 'cones'... rather connective, don't you think?

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

MONTY PYTHON AND THE HOLY GRAIL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterScarlotti

Oh yeah! Laughing my head off and Geek Points too? Sa-weet! Loves me some Monty Python.

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJamie VanBeekum

Oh Honey, You have to be a bit more archaic than that! Your fan base and Monty Python's has to be made up of at least 75% of the same people :)

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMelyssa

Each day I look forward to my am wreck break.. today you have me in tears. Thank you.. Monty Python and the quest for the Holy Grail is one of my altime favs... Now I will have to watch it again tonight.

Sandy

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSandy in SoFla

You must bring us...a SHRUBBERY

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterVal

LOL LOL man cannons...

Seriously, best post ever. ROFLMAO!!!

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKaren @ Citrus and Candy

The Knights who say NI! I'm off to get a SHRUBERY!

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterShauna

The Knights who FORMERLY said Ni, obviously!

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLarissa

I saw "Spamalot" in Fayetteville, Arkansas - Home of the Arkansas Razorbacks. When the Knights who say "Ni" went into their "We are now the nights who say. . ." line they added "Whoooooooooo Pig Sooie" into the mix. I don't think many things in my life will amuse me more than King Arthur calling the hogs!! The crowd went wild, it was hilarious.

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

My main objection to the first one is the colour scheme. Purple towers, orange cake, blue flowers, blech.

wv: deoutabl The puremindedness of these wreckerators is deoutabl.

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDidoCarthage

Monty Python! (Though I actually prefer Ni!)

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered Commentermimi

I need a shrubbery!

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

oh, those glorious knights who say ... ni! that totally made my morning, and i am highly impressed, as i would have had no idea where to start spelling that.

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered Commentertangeria

Makes me wonder how I ever looked at a castle cake withOUT falling into the gutter.

And now, I probably never will be able to anymore. Gee, thanks.

Some call me....Tim.

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterFlartus

There are even...veins...or what looks like veins, on the second one! How could they not notice???

I know I live in the gutter and all but I also know I am far from alone!

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRachel

Monty python. :)

Love the "sound effects" during the post. hehe

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLaura

TheSacredandtheProfane, totally missed the Ivy Veins. I had to go back and look at the second cake again.

aaah monty python is a lovely break from Power Point Presentations.

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterHeadPickle

Excuse me while I try to wipe the cherry kool-aid off of my monitor...Need to remember to not take a drink before reading...

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDonna

Monty Python! The Knights who say Ni!

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKelly

Looks like these were inspired by the Little Mermaid castle. Remember that?

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterdrumnate

Are those veins on the second one??

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSheila

WHERE do they put silver sprinkles on man cannons? I've never been to a Chippendales show, but maybe the idea came from them? I will have nightmares from the second one, with all those black cracks/veins, and the lovely gray icing waves at the base.

"You don't become a king just because some watery tart lobbed a sword at you. That's no basis for a system of government. Help! help! I'm being repressed!"

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKeeley

"eckie eckie ecki" -- spake by the Knights who say Ni, in Monty Python & the Holy Grail! Awesome!

August 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJan

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