Flying the Hungry Skies

"Excuse me, Ma'am, is this your cake?"

"Um...yes?"

"Well, I'm going to have to confiscate it."

"What? Why?"

"This so-called 'frosting' is clearly a 'gel' and therefore threatens national security. Move along.

"But, but..."

"NEXT.

"Whoah, whoah, whoah. Sir, I'm going to have to take that delicious-looking...er...I mean, that dangerous looking Santa cake.

"It looks suspicious."

"But food is allowed through security!"

"Yes, but this obviously isn't 'food.' It's some kind of weapon. And I'm hungry.

"Oh, did I say that last bit out loud? Haha, silly me. NEXT.

[munching] "So, what have we here?"

"Just a little gift for the family back home."

"I'm sorry, but there's no way for me to know that's really a cake and not some kind of zombie snowman capable of terrorizing your fellow passengers. I'll have to take it off your hands."

"No, look! I can take a bite! See? Yummy cake!"

"Nice try, terrorist. Now we'll have to extract that. Sergeant? Take him away. (But leave the cake.) NEXT.

 

"No, no, I'm sorry, animals aren't allowed."

"It's a reindeer CAKE."

"We can't be too careful.

 

"Hold up there, Miss. Do you have a permit R2D2C3PO for that item?"

"There's no such thing!"

"Of course there is, Miss, and I'm the official gingerbread cake confiscator." [flashing badge]

"Did you...did you just flash a Subway rewards card at me?"

"No."

"Yes, you did!"

"No, I didn't. Gimmie the cake."

 

"So I guess you'll be taking my cake, too, then?"

"Nope, that one looks perfectly harmless. Have a nice flight!"

 

Thanks to Mark & CJ, Naureen, Kelly D., Brooke F., Kittie L., Sandy K., and the TSA, who really have started confiscating cupcakes because the frosting is a "gel." Enjoy those flights, everyone.