My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

When Irish Guys Are Dialing

Today, on behalf of Ireland, the Irish, and people who like Guinness, allow me to say:

Sam is gonna be thrilled, I just know it.

So will Pabrick.

And wait'll he hears about his promotion!

I'm not sure if I should salute or cross myself.

Now, there's a stereotype floating around that we Irish like to drink.

I don't know where this comes from.

And frankly, if I were able to see straight or type this without developing motion sickness, I'd be extremely offended. [hic]

Hey, look! A green golf bag! How appropriate!

[head tilt]

Wait, no. That's Scotland. Sorry. I always get Craig Ferguson and Colin Farrell mixed up.

There's also a common misconception that we Irish have nasty tempers. I don't know who started this rumor, but if I ever find out I WILL CUT OFF THEIR BANGERS AND MASH AND FEED THEM TO THE LOCH NESS MONSTER.


That's Scotland again, isn't it?


So, in conclusion, this is a terrible four-leaf clover:

That, or this Guinness is making me see triple.

Oh, and also: Be careful when doling out kissing commands today. There's a big difference between telling an attractive stranger, "Kiss me, I'm Irish" and telling just anyone Irish to kiss you:

Don't believe me? Well, consider this: all of these guys are Irish:

"Aye, yore a pritty one, ar'ntcha?"

"Heh aheh hehehe."

"Forget those lucky charms, lass, I've got yore pot o' gold right here!"

Yep, we Irish can be a bit creepy. It's part of our charm.

Rock on, Colin. Rock. On.

Thanks to Stacey T., Liz C., Jodee R., Cristina, Claire P., Emily C., Jen F., Rebecca M., Leslie C., Jenaro P., & Heather H., who are all honorary Irishmen today. So wear those red beards with pride, ladies.

« Fill Me Up, Buttercup. | Main | Shamrocks? How About ShamPOOS? »

Reader Comments (124)

That one could say "Kiss me Trish"

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterjbreckenridge3

I love how Adam's ALL into the dancing and Jamie's just standing there being all serious. Awesome!

WV = aphizin. Aphizin. Sounds like some kind of prostate medication, doesn't it?

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterPromise

That first Irish guy looks just like the Ma Na Ma Nah Muppet.

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMiya

Oi, I hate it when I get Colin and Craig mixed up too!

"I've got yore pot o' gold right here!"
I laughed so loud I scared the cat right off the bed.

"Step one
-Cut a hole in the pot"

I love the reference to the Easter Bunny cake. So funny!

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKatiMomKat

Thanks to the little orange haired leprechaun- all day i'm a gonna be all....

doo doo da doo doo..

M'naw M'naw.

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterHawkfeather

oh dear ghost of the St Patrick... that pot of gold comment on the cookies sent me over the edge laughing. Bravo Bravo Bravo Still laughing and choking LOL

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterRachel

Happy Sam Pabrick's Day, everyone!

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterladycrim

Wow. Very poor placement of those pots of gold. Yikes! I do see one point of hope on this post, though. For all the bad clovers you showed us yesterday, that "I *clover* beer" ccc actually has a nice clover on it! Shocking! Hilarious post as usual. Happy St. Patrick's Day, Jen and crew!

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLaura P.

if you're insinuating that Craig Ferguson is Irish, then you are wrong. He is Scottish, much like your golf bag.

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

J, I eat cake on St. Patrick's Day. Sure, it's my birthday, but still. :-)

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterladycrim

But you can't drink a cucumber...

...wait, green beer? It's not natural!!

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterdrcath

"Forget those lucky charms, lass, I've got yore pot o' gold right here!"

Classic! I love it!

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

If Cousin It (from the Addams Family) and a leprechaun "got it on" the result would be that first leprechaun cake! ROFL!

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterTonyT

"I've got your pot of gold right here." *LOL*
"Is that a pot of gold, or are you just happy to see me?"

Keep them coming, Jen!

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMoira Cooper

...OR that cookie implies you're a different nationality & you're desperate to become Irish by being kissed by everyone today. That's how I read that one, at least.

I love these posts! Keep it up!

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMichelle

Those were great... especially like the pot o' gold men... just like a man to have the gold right down there.... why must you tease me....

WV: Scull.... I will kick you in the scull if you kiss me Irish!!!!! (there goes that Irish, excuse me Scottish temper again)

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterNo Cake Fo' You!

The gay Irish gingerbread men are naughty! As to the "Clover" someone must have already been hitting the Irish Coffee that morning.

(Because I now know what it means)
WV: Gorph - When I drink too many beers ugly people gorph into pretty people.

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterPandora

Does the price tag on the 2nd one really read $22.99?!?! Madness!

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered Commentermin

@Shanti - yes, but is there golf? :-)

@Miya - I knew I'd have all kinds of Irish music running through my head today, but never expected Ma Na Ma Na! :::walks off, humming:::

wv - do I hear the dystin sound of bagpipes -- er, uilleann pipes -- and tin whistles, and a bodhran?

(whew, almost messed that one up)

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterEllen

Why is it that the funniest part of the video was Jamie Hyneman?

The pot o' gold picture is burned into my brain and I am afraid I will never be able to look at Lucky Charms the same way again.

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKnit Wit

The pot of gold gingerbread men & the Lt - let me just say that these 1/4 Irish eyes are smiling! :) Awesome stuff.

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterNanette Richards

for the record, i am extremely thrilled.

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSam

What on Earth are the Mythbusters doing in that music video? (Wait, why am I asking? Who cares? IT'S THE MYTHBUSTERS! THEY MAKE EVERYTHING AT LEAST 20% MORE AWESOME!) <3

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterChey

#1 First vowel is an 'o'; first letter on second line could be a fancy 'G' (think General Mills logo), third letter on second line is an 'n'. Thus, being fully decoded: 'Hoppy Gan Patrick Day'. *Now* it makes sense.

#2 'Happy *St. Palrick's Day' indeed. Oh, the irony of the long-lost apostrophe, and properly placed, at that. I know food prices are going up, but $22.99 for a cookie? With spelling issues, at that. Kiss me Irish, dude.

#3 Lt. Patricks must feel honored.

#4 Q: "What are we going to do with those watermelon cakes from last summer?" A: "Bring me those pretzels we've been trying to unload -- I have an idea."

#5 Yes, nothing says 'par-tay' like blue cinnamon rolls* and a tall, foamy mug of...lemon pudding.

*I think they're cinnamon rolls. Though they might be something else altogether. No, I have no opinion on how they were cooked, if in fact they were.

#6 Are we implying that Scotland and Ireland are the same? Because that just won't do. You see, for one thing, they're spelled and pronounced differently. (My ancestors are Scottish, and I approved this statement. Just don't mention 'haggis', whatever you do.)

#8 As I said earlier...

#9 This could be the official logo of those anonymous trolls, er, *wonderful folks* who visit CW when we're all in need of correction. Whatever would we do without them.

#10 The shape says 'Valentine's Day', the red / green color scheme says 'Christmas' -- we're talking a minimum three months that these things have been around. Ah, the power of preservatives.

#11 Love the official comment -- snark it up! Uh, wait -- there's something coming over the intercom: "Roy G. Biv to the bakery, please, Roy G. Biv to the bakery."

-Craig (not Ferguson)

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

There seem to be a number of Anonymouses (Anonymice?) who completely missed the running Irish/Scottish gag. Or who were with you right up until the video.

For you Anons: *It was intentional!*

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterelissa

What Trevor said! ROFL!!!!

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSharna

I think even I was blinded by Pabrick. It doesn't say Pabrick. It's either Pabick or Palrick. The small part of the 'b' is the (alleged) 'r.' It can't be used twice, as that would be against some ordinance somewhere. ;o)

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

(hope I got that right!)

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLeslieAK

MissNay -

I was doing a wonderful job NOT frightening co-workers, just barely holding it together, until I read your comment.


::GUFFAWS, DIES, hides under desk::

WV: Bentromp. Actually, I'm going to just let that stand on it's own.

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKimberly

LOVED this post!!! I was LOLing all the way thru and nearly lost it with the pot of gold crack. You make my day!!!

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBetsy

Craig Ferguson ...on Cakewrecks?

*dies a happy death*

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSarah G.

Modern English did "I Melt With You," NOT a Flock of Seagulls... unless he's trying to look like the guitar player for M.E., in which case he needs to put the microphone down. That having been said, Happy Celtic Heritage Awareness Day! (I don't salute anybody who is mean to snakes.)

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterwidogmom

Holy Schmoly! Did you see the price on those wrecks???? I would need to be drinking me green guiness in order to pay for them!

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDonna

am I the only one who realizes that they obviously had extra heart shape packaging (and possibly pan)from valentines day to make those lepracauns?????? talk about recycling!!!! LOL

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Guessing the Wrecker's train of thought on the fourth cake was an unreasonable amount of fun. "Let's start out with half a watermelon ... then put a crescent of marshmallow fluff at the top ... then, hey, why not, I'll just shove this pretzel in the side. That should do it."

And I seriously thought that other cake said "Kiss me Trish."

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterRebecca

So glad I wasn't drinking anything when I got the "got you pot of gold right here." one. My keyboard would not have survived!!!

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterGwynne

Pot O Gold! bahahahahaha!

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Bwhahaha. Pots of gold. Genious.

Talking of Scotland... can we get a Scottish themed wrecks? Or even a tartan themed wreck? ...Pretty please? ;)

As for Craig Ferguson... well, I can laugh at him 'cause he's a Weegie (:P too any of you out there. heh)

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSukiTodd

And is it surprising that the wreckerators couldn't even get the order of the colors on the rainbows correctly on those strange gingerbread men? Well, maybe that's the least of their problems....

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous


March 17, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterdharmapupil

How could the baker not know that the pot of gold cookies would be taken immediately to the gutter?!

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterThe Black Dog

Is it an EPCOT if the EPCOT-iness is about an EPCOT? So, in Austin at SXSW, sitting on the second story balcony at a bar, having a Guinness, listening to a Scottish bagpipe band...covered my cultural and ancestral bases for today.

"...your pot o' gold right here..." So glad I wasn't having the Guinness now - a nasal rinse with Guinness just doesn't seem right.

@KatiMomKat - Hi, Kati!!! (waving vigorously)

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMiss Mindy

Is it bad that I thought the second cake was trying to wish "Sam" a "Happy Patrick Day" and that the only thing I thought was wrong with it (aside from the arrangement) was that the apostrophe s was missing? Anyone else?? No Just me... ok...

w.v. nottis

Did ya' nottis that bonnie wee cayke overr dere? The one wit' da little leprechaun on et? It's ugly ain't it?

(Sorry, That was my best try at a typed scottish accent, no offense meant)

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterVeggieT

What better way to celebrate then with cakes about beer and gingerbread men that look like creepy clowns? I was reading today that St. Patrick was actually officially British, which makes you wonder with the feud the countries have over bragging rights how confusing this holiday must be for them.

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterManaged Hosting

Am I the only one who saw "Happy Dan Patrick Day" on that first one?


March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The heart shaped things look like the Urdd symbol

Mister Urdd.

like we said St Patrick was Welsh!!

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterdiddleymaz

Oh my freaking gosh! This post was hilarious, and it was all I could do not to laugh out loud at the "pot o' gold" comment - way too good!

@MissNay 11:15 am - major win with the "Step 1: Cut a hole in the pot" joke. After John's comment, now I have to re-trace the past few months and find Jen's original line about that SNL skit. Anyone have a clue when that would have been posted?

WV: harma - Your mind will be totally blown by these wrecks, but no physical harma will come to you - hopefully.

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnne-Marie

What's up with the guy with the tambourine?? He doesn't even make it rattle, not even once? But I totally agree, everything goes better with Mythbusters!! Possible even Guinness and green icing.

Luvya Jen and John Matthew Mangan Yates, och aye!

MC from NZ

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I have red hair so I pretend I'm Irish on this very special day! I love Jamie & the creepy guy dancing on the desk! Thanks for the daily laughs!!!

March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterColony's Cakes


March 17, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterblonderhody

As I'm recovering from a St. Patrick's week cold, that Pot 'O' Gold line threw me into a coughing/choking fit of laughter. I need one of those pots.


March 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

PostPost a New Comment

Enter your information below to add a new comment.
Author Email (optional):
Author URL (optional):
Some HTML allowed: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <code> <em> <i> <strike> <strong>