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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

It's Kind of a Cross Between "Shushing" and "Churning"

And if that doesn't work, he gives it a good battering.


Thanks to Mickie D., who prefers taking a bite out of crime.

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Reader Comments (45)

Ha Ha. Maybe they meant to say "cursing crime." Batman's gone existential...he doesn't actually fight crime, he just curses it's existence.

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKati

If you take a criminal to Chursh maybe they'll believe in Cheesus. The people on Glee would be happy, anyhow.

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMimiheart

Maybe it's Churning and Cursing....

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKathleen

My first thought was that the cake was for a little tot that can't get all their words straight yet. If I had a tot that said something bizarre like that, I would TOTALLY get it put on their birthday cake, in everyone would know it was intentional.

But, then, I spent all day chasing after my two year old, and am kind of fried. And biased. ;-)

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAunt LoLo

Loved the "Wreck the Halls" trailer!!!

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKarla in CA


Maybe it's a request from the parents because they're 4-year old's crazy about Batman and refers to "crushing crime" as "churshing crime". It's possible.

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSuzie

How come these posts are from the future (as in, I thought that you always posted at like, 8ish in the mornings and I can see these late at night the day before the correct date)?

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSavvy

Whatever that means! The batman and all that is okay, just the writing and so forth. Maybe we can add churshing to the dictionary.

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered Commentershikiblade

I'm guessing the thought that it's the kid's pet word prolly isn't so very true - the pic is taken at the party, and most likely by the parent (or at least attendee, who would have gotten the story). If it was intentional, it wouldn't be a wreck, right?

But yeah, I totally did a card once for my brother that had all the pet words from the flamy (that's "family" for the rest of you) - it was hilarious!

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJude

I love that the "'quotations"' come in threes!

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBabyCakes

Obviously they meant "crushing crime" but... holy hell... not even close!

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJess

Wait, the Batman symbol is in quotes...

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCourtney

Curious minds want to know: was this the same bakery that produced Jerry Spachla Party? Whose accent can we blame this time?

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnne-with-an-e

And is Churshing Crime in the ever elusive triple quotes? Wow, that's '"special!'" :-)

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJen @ Cup a Dee Cakes

A four year old can't spell all that well, so I doubt they'll even notice, shrug.

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBernice

Maybe it's from the "Churshing Bakery." They realized they couldn't read the order form, so they simply acknowledged they were going to blow it and wrote their confession on the cake. It's like a "dying declaration," which is assumed to be true because a person wouldn't lie on their deathbed. On cake, it's called an "icing declaration," because a person wouldn't go to all the trouble to change tips and write out the declaration if it wasn't true.

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

And no one points out the quotation marks around the Batman logo or the quote and a half around the offending words??

Serious wreckiness.

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

I don't think those are quotes around the Batman symbol. I think they are motion symbols. Like the symbol is flitting about. Or vibrating or something....

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterErin

Its like a live version of word verification!

"After a long day of *churshing* crime with Batman, Roman settles in for a nice piece of cake. Even though he can't forever keep this cherished cake, he will always have pictures of him and his family with blue/black teeth to commemorate this special day."

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBecky

Maybe it's supposed to say "Chasing Crime" and the " three quotes" are actually trying to express movement?


August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCC

And the three quotes are another great aspect of the cake! I love it.

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterTrevor

Anyone else see that as a "g"? I'd say it was something about "ghurshing" crimes -- crimes that involve ghurshing noises. Like, oh, bubbling toxic waste. Or sewage.

Wait, we were talking about cake, right?

I hope it's not molten-chocolate.

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterChristian

Imagined conversation -

""Baker"":Okay boss, this one is ready to go.
Boss: And what word is that supposed to be?
Baker: Crushing
Boss: Hmm, that spelling doesn't look right, I know let's add a bunch of quote marks all over the place and distract them. Maybe no one will notice....

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterHeather J.

Well, Batman doesn't have any superpowers, so he needs all the high-tech toys Bruce Wayne can buy...we just didn't know that one of them went "chursh". Learn something every day with this blog.

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSaraCVT

Just stand back when you light those (((Roman candles))) ....

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered Commentermel

The things around the logo are not quotes-it's supposed to be the spotlight, although they did not make it clear. As for the cake it's self< wher are they hiring these people from????

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMINDY1

Ladies and gentlemen of Cake Wrecks, it is now our duty as nerdy English speakers to make "churshing" an actual word.

Sample Definition:
chursh: (vt) to destroy utterly, leaving only the faintest traces behind.

"If {Batman/the Joker} was smart, he'd just chursh {the Joker/Batman} and be done with it."

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMr Frog

"'Holy flotsam, Batman, The Chursher has turned us to plastic!"'

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMomcat

Heh. Aheheh. "Battering." Aheheheheheh.

Does anyone else think those are not triple quotation marks, but rather, wiggly marks? My thought was that the words were moving back and forth along the side of the cake.

I think it's supposed to be "chasing" and the person ordering wasn't used to talking with his retainer just yet. Or else, had a big bite of food in his mouth.

Seriously, that "battering" pun is so bad, it's good. I'm still giggling.

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMay

This one 's for everyone who misses the WV.

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

SO close.. :)

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterkat

Took me far too long to figure out this probably meant "crushing"

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered Commenternnaylime

it had so much potential! until i see that the decorations are plastic :( I dont even know what the word was supposed to be in the 1st place!

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterjen

Crushing crime???

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMaggue

Maybe it's a Roman term. You know, like Ronaldus Maximus. ;-)

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

No, no, no... you're all wrong. It's *obviously* a cake for a four year old fan of the movie "Mystery Men". I mean, come on! Pee-wee Herman's character superhero Spleen was always "Churshing crime"!

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDebby

I have a chursh on Batman (all of them, actuallly, from Michael Keaton to Christian Bale).

Very funny Mel & Craig!

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBarbara Anne

Batman would have the decorator dropped into Arkam Asylum before you can say, "Holy crime against pasty, Batman!"

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBeth

new favorite verb!

August 18, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterfim

'"Chursh'" you, ChakeWherckers!

August 20, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnnie in Texas

Is it just me, or does Batman look like he's River-dancing?

August 21, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterGale

looks like batman's out for a jog instead of fighting crime or 'crushing crime' as it may will be. Maybe they meant 'chasing crime' ?

August 26, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterali


August 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLATONYA

Looks like it was meant to be "crushing". And to be honest, those don't look like quotation marks, they look more like parenthesis. As in "(((churshing crime)))". Which is just as ridiculous as triple quotation marks.
On a side note, the "'Holy flotsam, Batman, The Chursher has turned us to plastic!"' made me laugh so hard that my stomach hurts now.

August 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKatie

Batman resolves to
join kick aerobics class and
find speech therapist.

January 4, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

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