My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Return of the Corpse Bride

At first I thought this was a zombie cake made for Halloween, so imagine my delighted horror when I realized... it's a wedding cake.

Raise your hand if you need a manicure!

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go scrub my fingernails until these facial tics go away. [twitch]


Thanks for the hand out, Jennifer M.

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Reader Comments (51)

Awww.. who wouldn't want an undead hand and butterflies for a wedding cake?

*raises (living) hand*

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

That cake (cakes? looks like another one in the background) is made of pure awesome. And zombie. But since zombie = awesome, this cake is awesome squared!

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda

For a zombie cake, are the nails really that bad? I actually think this is a pretty darn good cake. I'm sure it's what the client asked for, and I think it's well done. This might be the first time I totally disagree with you guys on a wreck.

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterTrevor

Sung to “Chapel of Love”

Goin’ to the chapel and he’s gonna get buried
Goin’ to the chapel and he’s gonna get buried
Needs a manicure before he’s gonna get buried
Maybe he should wear a glove.

Thing is here, we are too, whoa oh oh
Man hand in lace makes us so blue
Today’s the day we’ll all say,”Ewwww.”
And we’ll never unsee it anymore, because he’s…

Goin’ to the chapel and he’s gonna get buried
Goin’ to the chapel and he’s gonna get buried
Needs a manicure before he’s gonna get buried
Maybe he should wear a glove.

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

So is it a zombie wedding cake? Because that's the least disturbing option presented.

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMollyscribbles

Well...the lace on the hand really does make the difference here.

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJessica

Aw, it's Mrs.Thing! How sweet; there really is someone for everybody! (Okay, maybe not everyBODY, but you know what I mean.)

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterzoomom

Looks like "man hands" from that Seinfeld episode was the model for this one. Ew.

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAnnie

I think the scariest thing is that you can see
another one behind it.

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAna

That is soooo not a wreck - I love it!

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCaroline B

I think it is a cake for a Halloween wedding.

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterdrkala

Ana — I think you're seeing the reflection of the back of the cake in a mirror.

The execution of some of the "normal" decoration on the cake isn't great, but the hand is great.

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJoel Polowin

Actually, this cake is very well done, even though it is kind of weird. I think the one in the background is a reflection.

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterPatti

Wait, was it supposed to be a zombie hand? Somehow, I get the feeling that maybe it was supposed to be a regular hand (why anybody would order a disembodied hand I don't know). But I hope I'm wrong. I really hope it was supposed to be creepy and mannish . . . . and gold?

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterHeather

I think behind it is a reflection in a mirror . . .

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterEmilyRose

It's a gorgeous cake ... right up until you see the hand coming out of it. Why? I mean really WHY!!!??? Go over the top and really zombie it up if it's a zombie wedding cake, but other than that ... WHY?

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJanelle

I think it's very cool. My only dislike is that the hand looks masculine, but I'm sure it was meant to look like the bride's hand.

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterdoodlebug

You guys, I'm no expert but I thought the undead didn't have a reflection.

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterzoomom

The second cake is actually an image in a mirror.

If this is what the happy couple ordered, it's really, really well-made and full of "awesome". If the happy couple asked for "lifelike", it's really, really well-made and full of "fail".

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBADKarma

Quicker commenters have covered almost everything, so I'll just say this: that looks like one cheapo engagement ring. A pearl? A SMALL pearl?!? Oh well, I guess the cake cost a pretty (?) penny.

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMaryM

Hmmm... Based on the background and the little kid who's looking at this cake, which is clearly in some kind of a display case, my guess is that this was at some kind of a wedding show. In which case it's even weirder, because people usually TRY to put their best work out for those shows to lure brides to hire them. Why would this cake entice anyone to hire the baker, unless there's a big demand for disembodied hand cakes around there?

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterkara buntin

Is there a face inside the cake or is that just the reflection of the photographer off the glass?

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterOH

Although not commonly seen, this cake acknowledges of one of the oldest wedding traditions. Ages ago, when diamonds and gold were expensive relative to the income of the average young man, it was often impossible for the groom to afford an engagement or wedding ring. While engagement rings were frequently forgone, as a matter of practicality, for the wedding ring the bride would commonly use her grandmother’s ring. Unfortunately, these were typically difficult to remove once the grandmother passed on – they had been purchased when the grandmother was much younger, and by now her fingers had increased in size with age – so the usual practice was to separate the hand from the wrist, preserve it, and then give it to the eldest granddaughter’s father for safekeeping until the girl was to be married. When such a time came, it was then that the suitor, indicating that he wished to marry the lass and would like to use the ring, would approach her father and ask for her hand in marriage.

@Sharyn: spp
@zoomom: first comment -- clever and funny (as usual); second comment -- traditionally, only vampires do not cast a reflection in a mirror...

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered Commentermel

The hand is BEAUTIFULLY done I think the creepy zombie thing is 1. the color is bad 2. the skin of the knuckles and the nail beds is so well done it is heading into uncanny valley territory.

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterunholyghost2003

EWWWWW! Gross. All the way around.

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterElisha

I would definitely call it a wreck. It 's too gold to be a proper zombie hand, and doesn't look nearly undead enough, either. The fingernails look to be a poor attempt at replicating a French manicure; that and the lace covering would lead me to believe that it's supposed to be the bride's hand (if the bride was a very large drag queen, that is). Perhaps the bride did ask for a "corpse bride" cake, but I wouldn't say that's what she got--it's more of a case of not enough corpse and too much bride.

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJade

Love this. Also, not real sure, but pretty sure the picture hanging down from the ceiling is a picture of me, when I won the Champion Cake Baker at the State Fair!

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKaran

Hey Sharyn, if you feel like doing an encore today, I think P!NK's "u + ur hand" just might work. :)

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterzoomom

A tad creepy maybe but AWESOME. Hands are so hard to draw, let alone sculpt, to say nothing of sculpting one out of EDIBLE anything... this is stellar!

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered Commentermouse

Swapping the hand for a skeleton hand would make this a totally sweet Halloween wedding cake.

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterbookwyrm

I'm reflecting on Epcot.

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCarol

I especially LOVE the butterfly on the pointer finger! It's all in the details.

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMorgen

I can answer a question this time around! People seem to be asking what the occasion was and why it was in a display case!

I have seen this cake with my own two eyes--because it was an entry in our State Fair this year. The most horrifying thing about it was that it didn't win first. Now THAT was monstrous, especially 'cause I saw the two that beat it--THOSE should've been the ones featured here! All that lumpy fondant....

But yes, that was an amateur entry at our State Fair's Halloween-themed Cake Decorating contest.

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMerv

That hand is so, so disturbingly real looking! (And, BTW, it looks a lot like my "man" hands.) I can only imagine what the wedding favors were like...

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMaryanne

Huh, the first thing I thought was: Oh how sweet! The cake that really says 'Our love will NEVER die!" Ha ha ha ha! I'm pretty sure this was intentional, and despite my aversion to zombies I think it's awesome. :)

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJess T

I must admit the cake is rather well done, however, according to CW Statute I-H8SYLNT6RN: "...a cake that is well made may also be a wreck if it causes the consumer to eat life-like bodies and/or body parts including, but not limited to, fetuses, buttocks, feet, HANDS [emphasis mine]....." and also CW Statute 1TSMYBLOG50NYA: "Ultimately, a wreck is anything Jen says it is and if you don't agree, we'll sick Theardare on you. Read the fine print - your soul belongs to me! Mwahahahaha!".

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAndrea

That is so AWESOME! I wish I'd had the courage to do something crazy-fun like that for my wedding back when swirly butter cream was the norm. Get those Aunts & Grannys horrified hearts a'pumpin!

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterPattymouth

At least give those Man Hands a French Manicure!

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterLaxmom

@mel - THANK YOU for explaining the origin of the term "her hand in marriage" !!!! Why is the hand coming out of the cake? Why is....just Oh why?!

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterChrisB CT

@mel: Bravo.
@zoomom: Bravissimo -- you're on a roll! What a great idea for a song. I'm afraid I don't have time for a complete encore today -- how 'bout the refrain: "It's me and my hand's a fright."

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

@Andrea: A Cake Wrecks attorney, citing Cake Wrecks law. I'm in awe!

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterTLC

Very well done. A perfect cake to shock the wedding guests!!

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterLollypop

I sooooo want to see the wedding pictures.

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered Commentersam

Daphne, I don't think you really want an exact model of your hand - no, that just doesn't seem necessary. Are you sure? Well do you think that you should wash them first? Ew.

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSunny

While pretty well done, this is still a bizarre cake-but some have theme wedding, so i'm going with zombie theme wedding here. Lolol@sharyn

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

@Andrea -- if that's not a reflection but is instead a second cake, they may also have violated the Statute of Imitations.

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

Well that bride has huge hands that's all I can say lol. Man that would be perfect for a halloween wedding but I have a feeling that isn't the case here. Hope that they liked the cake and that the wreckerator didn't have to flee in fear of being hit with it on the way out the door lol.

October 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

It's just a prop from the previously-unknown Ed Wood movie: Cross-Dressing Zombie Brides From Hell

October 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterDenita TwoDragons

I love the design. Sure, there are design elements that could be done a bit better: some of the lines aren't even, the fingernails are maybe a little odd, the color seems off.... but y'know, not all female hands have Caucasian skin tones, long skinny fingers and perfect manicures. Also remember: *zombie* hands are supposed to be kinda bloated. But jeebus, people...this is an _ameteur_ cake. If I was black and if it'd been me asking for a zombie Halloween wedding cake, and getting this one, I would have been thrilled.

October 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAJ

Just asking a question: isn't a corpse supposed to be skinny?

October 18, 2012 | Unregistered Commentergabsmom

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