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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Wednesday
Mar072012

There's a Moral in Here Somewhere...

Attempt #1:

"This is hideous. And why is there a giant blank space?"

"That's where you put a 'Happy Birthday' candle!"

"So it'll read, 'Happy Birthday 1st Theodore?!'"

"Is that a problem?"

 

Attempt #2:

"Ok, the inscription is fixed, but where'd all the decorations go?"

"Decorations?"

 

Attempt #3:

(AKA when the manager-who-used-to-be-a-baker steps in to "fix" everything.)

"THANK YOU. Was that really so har...wait a second.

"'Theardare?'"

 

Thanks to Sam and her dad for documenting what must have been the most frustrating bakery pick-up EVER. (And for the record, they just brought the last one home. Because the third time's the charm - or when you remember little Theodore can't read yet anyway.

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Reader Comments (70)

I love my "old-fashioned" name. (I got a lot of "my grandmother was named..." growing up.) I think my name is classic, and I loved that I didn't go to school with 7 other girls with my name. Theodore will be just fine, as will Walter. :)

March 7, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterTampamom

Innovation3M, I am happy to make your acquaintance. I am sorry you endured such terribly poor service and I hope that abysmal excuse for a designer is safely out of business.

I read your post with great interest indeed.

I have been lurking here for some time, after posting a comment somewhat similar to yours. Frankly, I am amazed that our reactions are so much in the minority.

With so many people in this country's service industry not only doing sloppy, substandard work, but to add insult to injury, not even bothering to *care*, is it any wonder that so many jobs are being sent overseas? It's not like cake decorating is a job that can be outsourced, but if anyone can get a better job done outside the country, AND cheaper, with almost no increase in time spent waiting, well, who wouldn't go for that??

March 7, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSharon

Hey, Trekkie Gal, there's a reservation at the Epcot bunker. Check in under the name J. Tiberius Kirk

March 7, 2012 | Unregistered Commentermsyendor

I can't imagine telling someone that their child's name is too old-fashioned and a burden for that kid. Perhaps Theodore was named for a relative--it's clear that Walter was named for three of them. Personally, I prefer classic names to the trendy names that every third kid has.I know someone who named her daughter Sylvia, and I love it. My daughter is Caroline, and as far as I'm aware, is the only one in the entire school.

March 8, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMelindaB

I think I would just use that last cake they took home as the kids smash cake anyways lol. The adults can have either cake one or cake two to enjoy. Wreckerators I hope to avoid you this birthday year by just having dessert at Chili's. Saves on cake and crying if they wreck it.

March 8, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

Excellent points, @Sharon. You're not as much in the minority as you might think.

March 8, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

Firstly, I would like to point out that the priniciples of evolution should also apply to Sam and her dad - you gave these idiots *three tries*??

Secondly, Innovation and Sharon - woah, lighten up, dudes! It's CakeWrecks, not a dissertation on the state of the global economy and the ways in which shoddy customer service has contributed. Sheesh.

And finally: I heart Cake Wrecks. It never fails to remind my that no matter how badly my day seems to be going, there's someone out there for whom it's going even worse.

:o)

March 8, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJoan

@msyendor- Tiberius? I thought this was 2012, not 12. Poor kid.

March 8, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

Craig, I like your story!

ftw, you are not the only one impressed by the fact that the balloons did not look like sperm.

And I'm printing Apocalypse Kitty, aka Theardare, and keeping him on my desk at work.

March 8, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterRae

Dear Joan,

I'd cut Innovation and Sharon a little slack; if I had to pay someone $600 for a printing job that turned out crappy I'd write a similar dissertation myself! Heck, I'd even include a thesis on the dismal state of our public school education!

The spelling and grammar Nazi in me is thankful that CakeWrecks is around, if only to remind me that I am not the only one who shudders at things such as the misuse of "your" and "you're!"

Jen and hubby of Jen, long may you live...

March 8, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterDaisy

@Daisy, I second.

To me, Cake Wrecks and the comment crew are celebrating the idea that someone still cares. I could look at some culinary disaster area and think, "at least it's probably edible," or "it's only cake," but how boring would that be. In addition to contributing to the decline of America in the global economy.

DOC is all about the idea that someone cares. That's why we risk -- well, I'm sure we risk something -- to 'correct and serve'.

March 8, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

@ Craig - "To Correct and Serve" - I'm so thankful not to have had any food/beverage in my mouth when I read that! HA!

March 8, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterLis

@Craig, Andrea & Theardare (the apocalyptic cat) you all win the interwebs. Congradulashuns.

I swear, this group just gets funnier every day. Relentless cheeriness, unending bickering and now the Epcot bunker is taking reservations?? Whose palm do I have to grease with a twenty to get a good spot- or are they still hiring?

March 8, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBarbara Anne

@ Barbara Anne

I hear you, Barbara Anne. We speak the same savvy language which knows that in the post-Epcot world, the monetary unit is cupcakes. You can grease my hand with a tray of 20 cupcakes anytime. I can't promise it will do anything but make my palm greasy, but hey, worth a shot, right? Maybe I'm the one with the key that will open the tunnel which will lead to the posh quarters in Epcot. One never knows about these things.

Especially me, I'm always the last to find out anything.

March 9, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

Hey, what's this key on my ring?

March 9, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

DOC staff can get in the bunker any time, but I like Joy's idea.

** A wild JOY appears! **
** JOY uses HAIKU! It's SUPER EFFECTIVE! **
** JOY obtains a KEY! Perhaps the KEY unlocks a BUNKER somewhere... **

March 10, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

Hey, still to the cake and stop judging the parents on their choice of names. That's none of your business..

March 12, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJanice

@Craig

I'm wiping tears of Joy from my face. It's true.

March 29, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

I am not one to take to the sauce myself, but there are plenty of people from the hick town that I am from that would love these cakes, including some of my own family members. lol

Looks like Barby needs rehab. lol

May 30, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterTerrie

I had to come back and read this entry as we approach the anniversary of this wreck. :)
Not that I think anybody who commented last year will be back to see this, but just in case:
@Bea-It was all the same one cake that we paid for, they just kept refrosting it. It was crazy how thick the frosting was when we cut into it,
-I have no idea why they refrosted after the 2nd time instead of just adding.
-We call him Theo or TJ, so we may not have been in such a pickle had we told them one of his nicknames rather than his full name, less letters to mess up, lol!

* and ftr, I didnt even notice til way later that the last cake had his name misspelled. I peeked thru the box lid when my dad arrived at the party location, and didnt see the name clearly. Im glad I didnt notice, or I may have had a Theardare the Cat type reaction. ;) *

February 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSam

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