My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Ghost Taunters: Friday the 13th Editions

[dramatic voice-over guy]: "Today, on Ghost Taunters International, the team travels to Geneva to investigate an ancient spa slaughterhouse that was also used as an asylum for homicidal clowns."

"Uh...guys? Does the fountain always do that?"


"Where tortured souls, rubber noses, and victims of unspeakable beauty treatments lie in wait..."

"There's something in the water. THERE'S SOMETHING IN THE WATER."

[sounds of scuffling]

"Oh, never mind. It's just some disembodied arms. And maybe a child's head."

"PHEW! For a second there, I thought we'd found a cold spot."


"And dark forces seem to be the dark."

"Ok, who brought the dog?"


"Are these wayward spirits trying to break free from their unearthly shackles and actually make contact?"

"Okay, I've got a plan. Stay close...stay close!...and..."



[more scuffling]

"Oh. Sorry, Leslie. But really, you might consider laying off the white powder and mascara."


"What shocking new evidence will be revealed in the team's quest for proof of the supernatural?"


[gasping] "OMIGOSH. Someone said my name. Did you hear that? Something said, 'Leslie.' I swear! Did you hear it?"

"I dunno; sounded more like 'Cream Cheese' to me."

"I heard 'Velveeta.'"

"Anyone else getting hungry?"


"Or could these spirits be up to more serious funny business?"

"The clowns are angry. I can feel it."

"Ok, if there are any clowns down here, could you please give us another sign? Maybe this time without killing our camera man?"


"Will the team find answers in this circus/spa/slaughterhouse?"

"This was the seaweed wrap room, wasn't it?"

"How did you know?"

"Just a hunch."

"Or will they face their greatest challenge yet?"

"Ug. You know, in this infrared your pores look DISGUSTING. Seriously. You should, like, exfoliate or something."


"Find out, on Ghost Taunters, International!"


Thanks to Cynthia C. booturtle, Teri P., Natalie B., Chris C., Lyn W., Diana M., & Anna M. for the MASS HYSTERIA.

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Reader Comments (76)

Lucy's obviously the "brains" of the outfit.

April 13, 2012 | Unregistered Commentergabsmom

Is that a Wig O' Intestines, or an graphic example of why not to put too much yeast in your brain? ALL of them: breakfast? lunch? dinner? dessert? I'll pass, thanks..

April 13, 2012 | Unregistered Commentergobbler

As far as shiny brown dog's heads go, cake #3 is not bad. Now, I can't imagine WHY you'd actually want a shiny brown dog's head....

April 13, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterLinda

What a week! You are so right, SuBee -- very educational...and very funny! I am drained -- far too much laughter! Jen and john (thoj)-- you guys out did yourselves this week! Kudo's all around! And Sharyn -- how do you do it? A comment series that ran over three days (by the way -- thanks for taking in Barbara Anne, but can I come and visit you two periodically?) (and...thanks for the compliment --you are far too kind), another funny bit on Thursday, and today an hilarious song!!! You must have a triple portion of funny genes -- or else "Sharyn" is a psuedonym for a conglamerate of comediennes who write this stuff and are "sharin'" a name....but I'm guessin' you are just naturally gifted! Again, thanks for the fun this week, and I'll work on keeping my end up (please note reference to Opus...).

April 13, 2012 | Unregistered Commentermel

I've read of "gooseberry eyes", and now I've seen them. Thank you, Miss Lucille Bowel. I suspect we have a wreckerator into serious camp here.

April 13, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMarkM

*Velma. That's what I get for assuming I had the name right -- I figured it was better to call it on myself.

April 13, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

Do the dog's eyes glow in the dark? That would be 'cool'.

A face mask called 'Honesty'. [Mentally reviewing possible jokes]: No, no, NO, no... The wisest course of action appears to be, 'leave it alone'.

April 13, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

Lucy's eyes are supposed to be blue, not sickly pondscum green.
And yes, it looks like she's wearing a wig made of raw meat.

April 13, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterxevo

I am so confused by the second cake. Why are there body-less arms? I stared at it a while with my head cocked to the side before I could continue to the rest of the post. And then I went back to it after reading the entire post. What the...?

April 13, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterRachel H.

What did poor Kevin do to deserve a cake like that? I want to send him a sympathy card.
Leslie has intestines on her head until you scroll down and realize you were looking at hair on a person's head. Ewww!
I do like the cucumbers though. And the jar of face goo with the brand name of Honesty. That irony tickles my funny bone. :-)

April 13, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMarnieB

ok what's going on in that pool? And why does it make "Kevin" "happy" on his "birthday"?

April 14, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterLetitia

Aieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee you found an IT cake!!!! Nooooooooooooooo lol. I was hoping that was a cake no one would ever find. Now I will spend my time hiding under the bed tonight while my husband wonders what the heck I am doing under there..Maybe just maybe IT won't get me. As for that first cake I had a horrid period thought..yuck!

April 14, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

The Lucy cake looks like it has some Cruella Deville and Tammy Faye (bless her heart!) influences... The fountain cake looks like it belongs in a Carrie sequel in which she got overlooked as a bridesmaid in a wedding she wasn't invited to... Is that pink thing supposed to be an octopus?... And seriously- the clown and random body parts- why? WHY?

April 14, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMelody

Here come all my Pennywise nightmares, all over again!

April 14, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterShazS


April 14, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterEmma

@Melody, if Carrie were involved, the cake would be on fire.

Does anyone know how to contact Carrie? Just wondering...

April 14, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

I just put the clown cake as my new computer desktop. I can't wait until the kids see it.

April 14, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKara

Lucy and the Joker's love child whose face lit on fire and someone tried to put it out with a fork. Yikes.

April 14, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAnne Marie

So i read the first few sentences, and remembered that john calvin went to geneva. and i was like oh yeah, i did a report on him. and then i scrolled down and forgot about that in horror. WHY? WHYYYY??!!!

April 14, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterme

The worst thing about the first photo is those hideous drapes- couldn’t the photographer have gotten a better camera angle? Even a dumpster in the background would have been more tasteful.

The lilac colored undersea creature is the rare horror seal being restrained by seaweed until the full moon passes. During the full moon, their flippers become legs and they leave the sea and haunt bakeries looking for stale tortes. What they do with them is unclear but some researchers have noted a rise in attorneys visiting seaside emergency rooms complaining of being pummeled by pastry during full moons.

In the last pic, the little jars and manicure pieces are flipping amazing. The face looks like something from Westworld (starring Yul Brenner in the 70s- I STILL have nightmares about his gunslinger character).

April 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBarbara Anne

@Barbara Anne, are you trying to make a case for torte reform?

April 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

Ok.... Maybe I'm seeing it differently to everyone else. Or maybe everyone else is too uncomfortable to mention it. Or maWHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON IN CAKE 2? the 'person' in the top left corner... It's got to be said... ARE THEY LEGS AROUND HIS HEAD??? WHAAAAAAAT?????

April 18, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterNikki

Catching up on my Cake Wrecks.... I just had to come in and say that cake #2 really looks like a DNA test. Although why anyone would put a DNA test on a cake I can only guess! "Congratulations -- It's Yours! " Doesn't explain the disembodied doll parts though...

April 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterC.

@C. Congrats...It's-a-girl-and-if-you-ever-buy-dolls-for-her-I-will-dismember-them cake.

April 25, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterkelticat

@Susanna K

Maybe not UTI. Maybe just got hit upside kidneys with broom handle.

May 23, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterrocketride

I'm impressed with the dog...the sculpting is exceptional. However, I only noticed this after I could look past the giant creepy jaundiced eyes and the fact that it looks like it's been dipped in a pool of baby oil!

January 22, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterPenny

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