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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Thursday
Aug302012

Like Aversion?

I read that on Tuesday Madonna was booed by the crowd after she showed up two and a half hours late to her own concert.

So to properly honor the pop star, I've decided to post today's wreck two and half hours late, at which point you can all boo it.

 

....

 

Just kidding. What kind of jerk makes makes people wait two and a half hours for the entertainment they paid a lot of money for??

 (By the way, you all owe me a lot of money.)

Oh, and in the original photo, Willem Dafoe-in-drag is staring at his giant nipple. 

I cropped that out. 

You're welcome.

 

Thanks to Christine M. for the material hurl.

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Reader Comments (75)

While googling Madonna cakes, I came across this cake on a London bakery site:
http://www.thecakestore.co.uk/madonna-cake/#.UD-6KSKJsYs
I can't believe they're charging £95 for something that looks like that!

August 30, 2012 | Unregistered Commenternormajean

I agree with John Jacob... It's kinda spot on!

August 30, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

I am racking my brain trying to come up with a reason why anyone would want this cake. It looks like a manly zombified version of madonna...

August 30, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterShannon

Except for the poor nose and hair, this really is not that bad (I mean, aside from the strange request to begin with)

I mean, the hands are REALLY well modeled... (yes I'm referring to the uncropped cake). Exceptional, really.

It's more a cakewreck because of the content, not the execution...except that nose. Egads, that nose...

August 30, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMeba

Well done Jackwire! You managed to get almost all of the titles, cutting through the matter like a surgeon. And now I'd like a prayer for the poor folks who paid for this thing.

August 30, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterTXRed

I did it, too. I googled "Madonna cake". That was a mistake. Yes, this cake was there in all it's creepy, nippley glory, but what disturbed me even more was the number of headless, limbless torsos with astoundingly pointy boobs. I'm not saying it surprised me, just disturbed me.

August 30, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterzoomom

Well....you just know I had to Google this....it was made by a guy...and someone asked him who got to eat the nipple....he answered that he still has it.....gross, gross, gross...and there is a video clip of the "incident" in Istanbul. Another concert that I don't regret missing....

August 30, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterGrandmaJer

This might be one case where if the microphone seems to resemble something else, it's probably intentional.

August 30, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterlen

@jackwire tip of the hat to you!!!

@june7 I wasn't going to search for this-I know better if Jen thinks it's vile- but you put in a simple copy and paste link so... AUGHHHHH burnitwithfireburnitwithfire

August 30, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBarbara Anne

I like the microphone going up her nose. lol

August 30, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterDonna

Are you sure it wasn't a depiction Janet Jackson done with "creative license"?

August 31, 2012 | Unregistered Commenteranon

Well that just about ended my love affair with cake. Yuck. I honestly hope the wreckerator had nightmares after producing something so scary. Lol never really cared for Madonna and now with this cake I know why..she is scary.

August 31, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

Some of you people need to not only get a sense of humor, but grow up. This was a last minute cake I made for fun for my own Birthday party...that later ended up on Perez Hilton, The Soup, MTV and countless other sites around the world (none of which was mockery). I could care less about mockery anyway but what a crew this place has. I wish you all better, more productive people.

August 31, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterThe Pastryarch

Honestly, I mean, I think it actually does look a lot like her.

August 31, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterLittle Lovables

It reminds me of Michael Fassbender in drag from a deleted "X Men First Class" scene.

August 31, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAlice

Willem Dafoe in drag - priceless!!! This brilliant quip makes the Madonna monstrosity tolerable. For a few seconds.

August 31, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterEva

Um... why is she sticking a vibrator up her nose? On second thought, don't answer that.

August 31, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterHoundmom

@Pastryarch: I am an emergency room physician, a nationally ranked triathlete, and father of three. I make the birthday cakes for their parties, and throw in a couple of gingerbread cathedrals for the holidays. Sorry, but I don' t have time in my life to be a better, more productive people.

August 31, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterjackwire

Willem DaFoe in drag, courtesy of the movie Boondock Saints
http://www.theaterhopper.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2009/10/dafoe-drag2.jpg

You're welcome.

August 31, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAndreaLynnette

Um, I'm a bit more worried about the phallic looking object that "Madonna" is attempting to shove in her mouth!

September 1, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterGloria

Looks like she's trying to stuff the microphone up her nose. P.S. We waited 1 1/2 hours in Florence.

September 2, 2012 | Unregistered Commentermelanie

Willem Dafoe?

I was thinking that looked more like Rowan Atkinson (Mr. Bean) in drag!

September 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterWilliam

LOL:D

September 8, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterawesome muffin

The best part is now all of you have "Madonna nipple cake" or some variant thereof in your search history . . . Not that I have room to talk. You should see my search terms when I'm checking for plagiarism in student papers.

Cake made just for fun?
Perfect! Haikus are fun, too!
Dildo microphone.

October 30, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

@Haiku Joy - I'm glad someone's trying to fight plagiarism in our schools! And as for your haiku...heeheehee :-)

December 25, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKarateLady

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