My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

If The Shoe Fits...

...then you for SURE won't be getting far in it:

Thanks to Jennifer M. for that visual image. ("Heel, toe. Heeeeeeel, TOE! Heeeeeeel, TOE!")

And it's such a pity the baker didn't have, I dunno, some form of small-scale model to reference, isn't it?


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Reader Comments (57)

It took me a long time to work out that thing on the toe is a tiny handbag, not a sticking plaster.

It's a shame because the top half, the pink bit, looks fairly well done. Do you think they handed the heel over to an apprentice to finish, like a surgeon who can't be bothered to close?

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterVicki

Sung to "These Boots Are Made for Walking"

That cake is made for balking
And that's just what I'll do
Try to sell me that cake
And I will balk in front of you

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

What a difference an inch makes!

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLDM

This is the one time that I wish that had been a CCC. It would almost be forgiveable then. Almost.

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterCatherine

The ground is covered with snow this morning in Omaha, and we're still in a Winter Weather Advisory. That was mind-boggling enough for May 2.

But then I saw this cake. It took a full 2 minutes to see that the beige thing was a purse, not some kind of strange sole protection device.

And the rest:: Feed this to someone who has Imelda Marcos Syndrome. They'll never buy another pair of shoes again! It's a sure cure.

Sharyn: Thanks for the Nancy Sinatra reference!

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterTLC

There is no excuse for this. None. I don't care HOW busy the wreckerator was. Sheesh.

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJoan

Thank you Vicki! I had no idea what the purse was till you said something. My husband said it looks like she stepped in gum.

I guess this is what happens when you try to squeeze in an extra serving of cake.

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMuria

@Sharyn, somehow I knew that would be the selected song for today. Love it!

I'd hate to see the foot that did fit in that....uh....shoe.

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMary

The frightening thing is that I think I may just be a CCC (patooie!) covered in vast amounts of icing. The heel looks like it might be 2 cupcakes. Ack!

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterEmily

That is no where even close to a grocery store cake. That's a home baker or a regular bakery lacking any skills.

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered Commentercrissy

Hey now, the tiny, flesh-toned purse kind of hides the disparity.

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterET

The baker had just read Steve Martin's Cruel Shoes.

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJessica H

Mary> I believe that cake would actually fit my feet. Now, that heel? I might actually need one that thick because of the rarity I do wear heels.

Yeah, didn't know that was a purse, either. Thought it was a toe cushion or heel grip.

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSaraV

the pink part isnt bad. Had it been me, I would have just made the heel part a LOT lower and made it look like a shoe. It wouldnt have been exact to the cute little plastic model, but it wouldn't have been this monstrosity either.

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKrysmon

Reminds me of the Steve Martin routine, the "Cruel Shoes".

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJim L

I heard this cake won first prize at the National Cake Decorators was a shoe-in....

@Sharyn: spp!!!!

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered Commentermel

I've seen enough wrecks here to not be shocked by how bad this cake is, but I am totally baffled why the tiny beige shoe and purse (thanks for pointing out what that was) are even on there. Any ideas folks?

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterHeather

Shoe-cake, you baffle me... Shoe cake, you baffle me... Shoe cake, you baffle me... There's a template next to you... O_O

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBADKarma

I believe that the "heel" part is meant to be an old-style Nokia cell phone case ( It seems like the giant shoe is meant to be constructed from the accoutrements of a Sex In The City character.

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMichael K.

@Heather: Because it's easier than writing 'shoo' on the cakeboard.

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJust Andrea

Are you sure that’s a shoe and not a noisemaker? Because that’s totally what it looks like.

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterNagzilla

A cake for a girl so fabulous, that even her accessories have accessories.

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterjackwire

@LDM: That's what she said.

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLaxmom

LOL @mel! **wiping up coffee** when will I ever learn.

13 yr old MiniMe would LOVE a shoe cake for her birthday! I'll show her this and hopefully she'll change her mind.

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJodee

Michael K. - If your theory is correct, then it's an Epic Fail on even more levels. Kewel!

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBADKarma

@Heather, I think the miniatures are white chocolate candy molds. They're too perfect to be hand-molded.

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLDM

That's odd, it looks like someone suddenly realised this was meant to be a high heeled shoe not a pump or a ballet shoe, so they just panic slapped a sole and huge heel on there.

Are you guys sure that's a purse?

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterEmma

I thought the person stepped on Silly Putty. Also, the heel looks like the handle off of a hammer or something.

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLeigh Ann

Maybe it's a rum cake and the 'chef' was dipping into the ingredients.

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSamantha

Is the heel make of cupcakes??? There are two lumps. If so, this takes the cake for cupcake disasters

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterTee

No, you can't fool me. I know a Star Trek The Original Series Type II Phaser covered in pink icing when I see one.

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterIan Osmond

Are the tiny shoe & purse made out of Silly Putty?!

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterO2BNAZ

sorry, some things are not meant to be represented in cake, and the bottom of a shoe is one of them. But without making that faux-pas, we wouldn't have Cake Wrecks.

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMeghanKelly

Would you believe it's actually a Top Secret Control Shoe Gun (with pump-action trigger)?

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterjbrecken

@jackwire - LOL!!

My son just signed up for tap classes, so my first thought was "that's a strange-looking tap plate on that weird shoe."

Silly me.

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterlisadh

I honestly can't forgive this because it would have been so easy to template it rather than trying to freestyle the cut. I'm concerned that I knew the beige toe thing was a handbag right away. Maybe I need to lie down.

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKristen

It is a shoe gum, geesh am I the only one who sees it. ;) ;)

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJewels

I am so confused. Did 3 different people make this cake????
Tan, black, and pink icing all seem to be very different 'art' work.

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterpenelope

Looks like an orthopedic high heel..

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterDanielle

Although if she'd been going for a banner atop a castle turret, I would say she'd done pretty well. It's all in your perspective.

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterApril Fool

Ok. I think I figured this out. It's supposed to be a cake for a 7 year old girl. Who loves shoes. And her mom/baker/whoever thought it would be clever to meld the two (the big 7 and a pink shoe) together. Then when it looked confusing they whipped some plastic accessories on there just to make sure the message got across. Yep, nothing solves a poorly conceived piece of doo-doo like a mini plastic shoe and purse-thingie.

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMountain_Woman

I'm pretty sure this is a ballet slipper cake pan with a heel added onto it (possibly out of cupcakes). Hence why the top shape looks somewhat normal and the whole heel looks bizarre.

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterElle Dee

@Ian Osmond: Thanks, now you've said that all I can see in my minds eye is a redshirt gazing at his icing smeared phaser in dismay as his death rushes toward him.

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterEmma

So I guess I'm the only one that saw the thing at the toe and thought it was a panty liner?

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSusan

@Just Andrea ~ Salted caramel babies O.O Bahahahahahahahaha

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJodee

Maybe it is meant to be a gun-shoe cake. If Maxwell Smart can have a shoe/phone, certainly someone can invent a combination gun and shoe. No? I didn't think so, but I tried.

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterNancy

Never judge a cake decorator until you've walked a mile in her horribly deformed shoes.

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

When I first saw the picture, I thought it looked like a strange gun, and that miniature shoe was the trigger. Then I realized that this IS a shoe.

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJemWolf

A blind man could do better D:

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

Lady GaGa would wear that.

May 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBarbara Anne

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