My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Eat Your Heart Out, Shakespeare

[walking into spotlight]

[striking dramatic pose]


Poo bee...

... or NOT poo bee?

That is the question.

[raising fist to the heavens]

Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer 

the slings and arrows of outrageous fortunes,

Or to take arms against a sea of tribbles!


and by opposing...




[raising both arms and bellowing]

Tie dye!!

To seep no more!

And by a sheep,

today we end the heartache

and the thousand natural shocks...

... is that a hair?! EW!


'Tis a consummation devoutly to be wished.

Tie dye, to seep, perchance on buttercream!


There's the flub.

Blow, winds, and crack your heartfelt thanks to Jennifer T., Janet, Carol F., Lilly P., Amanda M., Alli S., Christy L., Sarah F., Sarah Jane, Brittany B., Paige H., and Karyn T, our Shakespearean pros.



PS: Been a while since English Lit 101? Then here, let me google that for you:

"To be, or not to be, that is the question:

Whether 'tis Nobler in the mind to suffer

The Slings and Arrows of outrageous Fortune,

Or to take Arms against a Sea of troubles,

And by opposing end them: to die, to sleep

No more; and by a sleep, to say we end

The Heart-ache, and the thousand Natural shocks

That Flesh is heir to? 'Tis a consummation

Devoutly to be wished. To die, to sleep,

To sleep, perchance to Dream; Aye, there's the rub."

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Reader Comments (90)

*applauds enthusiastically!*

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered Commentermillbrit

Genius! Brava! Brava!

And if you have not already, I recommend the Canadian show "Slings and Arrows" -- it's awesome.

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered Commentermolly

I never did understand that soliloquy, but now it is perfectly clear.

That said, those rainbow tribbles are just so darn cute! I'm guessing #10 is carrot cake, otherwise I can't see the significance of the decorations. Unless Jimmy & Matt are rabbits?

On the bright side, there are no misspellings today...

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterPatti

*standing ovation!*

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLoyal Fan

BRAVA!!! *APPLAUSE*APPLAUSE* ! That was sheer, sick genius, Sharyn! While the Bard may not be quite up to "eating his heart out", it could be that he's spinning in his grave...=^e.e^=

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

Ok, I confess, I like the rainbow tribbles.

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterOldish Lady

Hamlet + Cake Wrecks = AWESOME

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered Commentermik

So. Very. Well. Done.

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterChristine

Brilliant!! And I teach English, hitting Hamlet about every other year, so it hasn't been a while. I love it!

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKara

A rose by any other name...
Thanks Professor!

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJodee

I personally happen to like those rainbow puffball things, but great job otherwise!

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAviva

Ahh perfect :D

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

Huh! For years and years, I've had it in my head that it was "Ah, there's the rub." Now you tell me that it's "Aye"?? But...but..that sounds so "Popeye"! Oh, well--it's nice to learn something new every now and then!
Veddy good job, Sharyn~I toss you a virtual rose! =^~.~^=

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

Well done as usual, Sharyn!

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterwoodnwheel

Oh, and I wanted to add that we know that "Mr. Bill" himself had a great sense of humor, so he likely would have enjoyed this "rendition"!

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

(standing) Bravo! Bravo! (enthusiastic, bordering on wild, yet restrained applauding....) Somewhere the Bard...or maybe Sir Francis smiling. You have made English majors who are also Thespians and lovers of puns soooooooo happy! Clearly, the cake's the thing wherein thou'st humour doeth take wing....

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered Commentermel

Wow. Just... Wow.

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterShannon

YES! I want this as an Oral Interp piece now. I wonder if I could get the local speech teacher to go for that?

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMetzgirl

By a sheep, I mean,
by Martha Washington's wig,
I shall be avenged!

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

Ahh...Sharyn, this post is fantastic! Hamlet has always been one of my favourite plays -- especially his soliloquy.

This version is awesome...I will be smiling all day :)

Mel, I <3 your comment

...and for the record, those rainbow tribbles are rather cute ;)

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterEmily


You make my heart smile.

When will you open your own shoppe? You could still write part time for Jen & have your own blog as well. Right after reading my daily cake wreck humor I would sit at the feet of your blog to take in parodies of songs, soliloquies, sonnets, oh my.

It's obvious you love it!

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterTricia

Aye, there's the flub - love it!

Thanks for telling us those first two were bees, 'cause I wasn't seeing it. Can someone tell me why they're barfing up pinky-orange gel? I Googled beehive cakes, but none of the results had anything similar.


September 3, 2013 | Unregistered Commentervj

Two questions: first, why are the second set of bees vomiting? And second, since when is Q*Bert pink?

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterNagzilla

I can't decide whether to applaud or to ask you what drug you're on (and can I have some?). *chortle*

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterElissa

I lost it at "sea of Tribbles." Sharyn, your genius truly knows no bounds. Thanks for the giggle-fest. :)

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterStephanie

"Though this be madness, yet there is method in 't."

As if I needed a reminder why Cake Wrecks is so awesome. Where else can you find a mashup of Shakespeare and mashed cake?

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJ.

@ vj & nagzilla : My 6 year-old daughter likes to remind me that honey is "bee vomit" whenever we pull out the honey bear. She knows more about animals than I (from tv), so I'm going to believe her. In that case the wreck is scientifically correct yet disgusting, along the lines of the childbirth cakes, though not nearly as far on the disgusting scale, thank goodness.

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterTricia

Sharyn: Brilliant! I hope to see you at the Shakespeare Festival next year.

VJ: I think the orange goo is meant to portray bees carrying pollen, or making honey. However, bees carry pollen in sacs on their legs, and honey is made in the hive. So, epic fail on all parts.

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterTLC

Sorry, but the wittiness of today's wreckage reporting was overshadowed by the simple "Traditional" sticker on the sheep packaging.

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterwildmaven

Why are the Poo Bees on the second wreck vomiting orange marmalade?

Oh, and... BRAVO!!!! BRAVO!!! (wiping away a shed tear)...

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBADKarma

Ew, a hair!? I am laughing so hard right now! Thank you, this is genius- and Haiku Joy: Martha Washington's wig? LOL the perfect follow-up. Now, where do I go for a flotilla of tribble cakes?

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterms anthrope

Excellent post Sharyn! My brother in law is a thespian extraordinaire here in Hampton Roads, and The Bard is, of course, his favorite. I had to print this out, I know he would never come to the site first, he's going to howl when he reads this tonight!!! Thank you for the laugh, I needed it!

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterPam

Is it weird that I read it in my head in a masculine British voice? Loved it!

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSamantha T.

Oh, that this too too solid frosting would melt, thaw, and resolve itself into a poo....

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKris

"Dost thou think because thou art virtuous there shall be no more cakes and ale?"
Twelfth Night

Let's hope there will still be cakes, at any rate. And this web site. xoxo

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterFM

@ vj: The "pinky-orange gel" is "honey". What else could it possibly be? Don't answer that! =^>.<^=

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

BRAVA!!! Well done, Sharyn!

I bow in your general direction chanting, "I'm not worthy!"

PS - One can have great frosting with a bad cake. One just needs to lick it off.

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterlisadh

And now there's Bacon. [He] can do anything! I've been monitoring the "who wrote Shakespeare" debate for years, tending to side with the Bacon camp mainly to tease my sister, but ya gotta admit: calling a play Hamlet is a pretty obvious clue.

#1 I see slabs of fondant (?) but it appears to be hollow. Did we forget something, by chance?

#2 Bees do produce honey pretty much by regurgitation (let's get serious -- they don't have hands, so the only other alternative is even worse), but I could do nicely without such a graphic reminder.

#6 Exactly how fast did this cake have to be spun to get that effect? And how long did cleanup take after the 'trial and error' phase? "For the third time, Bevis, slow it down."

#8 "I think we should see other people." I agree -- this was supposed to be a three-hour cruise, but we've been here for years. Sticking around after the others were rescued seemed like a cool idea at the time, but how are we supposed to come up with new gadgets without the Professor? Speaking of, just how did you make that cake, anyway?

#9 Manager's Special level of contempt for customers, maybe -- I'd return that if it was free.

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

Brava, brava, brava, Diva!

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAlison in Indiana

Meep! <3
Sorry, love that word. ^-^;
Great post and a wonderful prose~! *applauds*

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterOkiku

Oh, Sharyn...By the way, did you happen to wear an apron today? I only ask because some of these wrecks look like they could make quite the mess for anyone *handling* them... =^~.~^=

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

hi jen. you are doing a great job with your blog and keeping me laughing all the way in zimbabwe.keep it up
today i especially liked the 'i think we should see other people' cake. i feel sorry for the poor soul who received it

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered Commenternyasha

Poetry, shear poetry. To sheep, perchance to scream.

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterEvalyn

Brilliant as always, but as a Shakespeare fan, I am in love today's post.

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterDegera

"I think we should see other people" is quite the cop-out! What kind of chicken-s*** person DOES that?! Bright side: at least it doesn't say "I see dead people."

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

The 99% that was Sharyn was brilliant of course.
The 1% that was Patrick Stewart's voice in my head wasn't bad either.

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

Ahhhh a English lesson and a good laugh. My day is complete, my friend!

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterCarrie

Thank you for making my favorite soliloquy funny!

I do agree with Craig though. I have long known that honey is bee vomit. That wreckerator did not have to remind me in such a clear fashion. smh

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterGinger

"For in that sleep of death, what dreams may come?"

You forgot the best line, the clincher of the whole thing!

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterember

Brilliantly done! Thanks for the smiles!

September 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterHolly

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